Invite wording if FIL are not paying a thing?

Ok, my friend from RI just called & said -'Ask your wedding people a question for me!!' Her FILs have not offered to pay a penny for their wedding. (not even the groom's dinner...) She doesn't want to put FIL's names on the invites b/c they did not contribute to the wedding. She also does not want to just put just her and FH's name on invites, b/c she wants to give her parents recognition. How does she word her invitations so people know her family paid for the wedding, but without making FIL look bad?

Re: Invite wording if FIL are not paying a thing?

If her name is Jane Smith and He's John Doe then either


Mr. and Mrs. Abraham Smith

request the hnour or your presence at the wedding of their daughter

Jane Marie Smith

to

John Francis Doe

__________________________


OR


Mr. and Mrs. Abraham Smith
request the honour of your presence at the wedding of their daughter

Jane Marie Smith

to John Franci Doe

Son of Mr and Mrs. David Doe

Re: Invite wording if FIL are not paying a thing?

Mr. and Mrs. Parents of RI Friend
request the honour of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter
RI Friend
to
RI Friend's FH
son of Mr. and Mrs. RI Friend's FH's parents
...

Re: Invite wording if FIL are not paying a thing?

what if parents ae paying for entire reception , bride attire, shower and odds and ends

grooms parent are paying for band, limos, flowers, video/photo

Then what do we do???????is it still ok to do son of>

Re: Invite wording if FIL are not paying a thing?

Same here Grooms parents did not pay for anything and my Parents are paying for the reception hall and Limo's and my dress and attire.

Me and Fh are paying for the invites,Flowers,favors, Honeymoon

So how should I word mines? The same way right but I don't know if FH parents should be on there at all? Or would that make them feel bad?

Re: Invite wording if FIL are not paying a thing?

See what your FH thinks about it.

I think putting 'son of' si kind of ambiguous.

Also, traditionally, the bride's familypays for the receptions, etc and grooms family will pay for a few things like RD and honeymoon, but they are still not considered the 'hosts' of the event, the bride's parents are, as they are paying the majority...so i think 'son of' is fine there... it really doesn't tell anything either way about the groom's aprents, but lets you know that the bride's parents are hosting.

If you want to acknowledge both sets of parents rqually you can put something like

Mr. and Mrs. Abraham Smith
and
Mr and Mrs. David Doe

Request the honour of your presence at the amrriage of their children

Jane Marie Smith

and

John Francis Doe

_______________

or 'together with their parents..

Ms. Jane marie Smith and

Mr. John Francis Doe

request the honour...

Re: Invite wording if FIL are not paying a thing?

In case the above was ambiguous, I think 'son of Mr and mrs...' is ok if the groom's parents are paying for part of the wedding (but a smaller aprt than the bride's family), and it's also ok if they are not giving anything...

if they aren' giving anything you don't really need to put them at all, but you may want to acknowledge them that way to be nice...

Re: Invite wording if FIL are not paying a thing?

What about if my parents are payng for 1/3 of the wedding and FI and I are paying for 2/3 (FH parents not contributing)...then what??

Re: Invite wording if FIL are not paying a thing?

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Posted by eogara

Mr. and Mrs. Parents of RI Friend
request the honour of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter
RI Friend
to
RI Friend's FH
son of Mr. and Mrs. RI Friend's FH's parents
...

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Our inlaws didn't pay crap and this is what we had for our wording.

Re: Invite wording if FIL are not paying a thing?

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Posted by jaclyncalderon

What about if my parents are payng for 1/3 of the wedding and FI and I are paying for 2/3 (FH parents not contributing)...then what??

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I'd do 'together with their parents' in this case, or just put your parents as the hosts. My parents were only going oto contribute a little, but I was going to put them as the hosts anyway, b/c it's traditional, and I don't really need the credit for paying for the wedding

Re: Invite wording if FIL are not paying a thing?

Does it really matter who is paying? IMO I don't care who is paying. I want both sets of parents on the invites as a way to recognize them and I want them to all feel included/special. We will be saying 'together with our parents'.

Re: Invite wording if FIL are not paying a thing?

We had a similar problem. My parents have passed away, and my FI and I are paying for the wedding -- but his parents keep talking about money they will give us. I don't want to count on anything -- we are about 3 months away!!! So, we used this:

Together with their families,
Alison.... and Joseph...
invite you to join them as they exchange marriage vows....

Re: Invite wording if FIL are not paying a thing?

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Posted by J&S

Does it really matter who is paying? IMO I don't care who is paying. I want both sets of parents on the invites as a way to recognize them and I want them to all feel included/special. We will be saying 'together with our parents'.

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No it doesn't matter who is paying, but I can understand if a bride wants to give recognition to her parents for making a financial sacrifice so she can have a wedding. --When the groom's parents are giving nothing. I think she wants people to know that the wedding wouldn't be taking place if it weren't for her parents. It's not about snubbing the grooms parents, it's about recognizing the bride's parents.