Jack and Jill Wedding Shower.

Okay here's the issue. I asked my bridemaids to PLEASE not give me a traditional wedding shower 'cause it's just really not my thing. Anyway, I heard a Jack and Jill is with both guys and girls. Does anyone have the lowdown on how the 'Jack and Jill' actually work?

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our jack and jill shower was a cocktail party - we had apetizers and drinks in the afternoon, everyone just mingled and talked

we opened the gifts after everyone left- which i prefer -

this was our Pennslyvania shower - it was very similar to our LI engagement party- but this one had different people invited so it was ok - i am having a more traditional shower on LI - Jack and Jill showers are a nice alternative if you do not have an engagement party

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Our co-ed shower was basically just a big party. Everyone brought gifts and we had his and her wishing wells (wicker laundry baskets) a DJ, a pretty cake, lots of dancing, drinks, and some light food, buffet style. It was at a KoC and we had around 100 people. We also did not open our gifts there. We opened them when we got home.

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We're actually going to one this weekend. I thikn they can be fun, but I know that DH hates them. He feels like showers are for girls and he doesn't see why he should have to go- and the one this weekend is for his twin brother.

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We are having one. Basically, it is going to be a BBQ at a relative's house. We will probably open presents in front of everyone. My family and FH's family have never really met (our Moms have met, though). I thought it would be a good way for everyone to get together and hang out before the wedding.

Of course, FH isn't thrilled about it, but he's going.

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I would NEVER do that to my FI or any male. I think they are so over tired of wedding stuff and could care less about opening a bunch of pots and pans. Just my opinion ofcourse

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I am having one its scheduled for this weekend. My sister told me all the details. I hate surprises.
They rented a lounge. There is going to be games, a dj and plenty of food.

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Thanks girls!!!! I was hoping it would be like most of you said. We both really just wanted to have a party without having to open the presents in front of everyone and act surprised that I got the bedding, china, cookware etc. that WE PICKED OUT!! It would be just to nerve racking and not our personalities at all( Just my Opinion!!). We don't do the engagement party thing in my family so I think a Jack and Jill would be great yet not repetitive. Thanks again! Keep the ideas coming!!!

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I wanted one but DH didn't like the idea. I think its great!!! My sister had one

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Posted by sweet.pea

just a note, i think guests might think that the bride and groom 'just want more gifts' when you have a jack and jill. so, it *can* be misconstrued as greedy.

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I not sure why just because men (usually husbands /boyfriends of the ladies who would be invited at a 'typical' shower) are invited, it would be construed as being more greedy.

Frankly, I didn't want a shower AT ALL, but it is important to my mother, so I am going along with it. I don't care about the gifts at all (I didn't even want to register either). I am looking at our shower as a way to get both families together to meet and hang out before the wedding.

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Posted by conigs25

I would NEVER do that to my FI or any male. I think they are so over tired of wedding stuff and could care less about opening a bunch of pots and pans. Just my opinion ofcourse

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Ditto! I like the idea, but the FI would totally feel uncomfortable! He comments about them to begin w/as they are! All girly, frilly, etc....just another reason for women to get together, spend money, and swap stories.

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Posted by alicegetsmarried

Thanks girls!!!! I was hoping it would be like most of you said. We both really just wanted to have a party without having to open the presents in front of everyone and act surprised that I got the bedding, china, cookware etc. that WE PICKED OUT!! It would be just to nerve racking and not our personalities at all( Just my Opinion!!). We don't do the engagement party thing in my family so I think a Jack and Jill would be great yet not repetitive. Thanks again! Keep the ideas coming!!!

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ill give you an idea heather...how about not getting one!!! keep making fun of me

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my FH actually wanted to be there....but we didnt see the point to have jack and jill b/c its so expensive...why have the wedding...but FH wanted to be there to tank everyone etc..so hell come towards the end

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Posted by nferrandi

We're actually going to one this weekend. I thikn they can be fun, but I know that DH hates them. He feels like showers are for girls and he doesn't see why he should have to go- and the one this weekend is for his twin brother.

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We were thinking of having one also... My FH wants to do it, but our groomsmen are all like uh NO were not going to a shower...

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I also told Steven just screw it and come to the shower anyway... He wanted to bring DJ equipment (he is a dj) and play the games with the microphone and all that jazz..

We were only going to invite the regular guests (family no men) and our groomsmen we have 8 and his dad.

I think it would have been fun... might still do it I dont know....

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Posted by sweet.pea

also, its more expensive for the ppl throwing your shower.. still screams 'i want more gifts' to me.

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Not necessarily. We are having a backyard BBQ with immediate family and a few friends (we are NOT inviting everyone who is invited to the wedding). Not everyone has a shower at a hall or fancy restaurant. I am considering our shower to be more like an engagement party (since we never had one).

It is unfortunate that you are making a sweeping generalization, but to each her own.

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i WISH my FI would go for a Jack and Jill!

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Posted by sweet.pea

just a note, i think guests might think that the bride and groom 'just want more gifts' when you have a jack and jill. so, it *can* be misconstrued as greedy.

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in most cases that is def true..but in heathers case they have the same exact friends..they've been best friends for 10 years..so any girls that are invited are pretty much couples with the guys they are friends with..so if its one gift per couple its kind of the same thing..i think they deserve it because the last thing they are is greedy...and they didnt have an engagement party...now that is something alot of people think is greedy..because its gifts then..the shower...and the actual wedding..but its true..to each is own..i hope this didnt sound snotty ..its not meant to be.