Brides Helping Brides ™ - Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

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Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

12-3Princess Posted: Sep 14, 2005 04:13 PM+

12-3Princess MEMBER SINCE: 12/04 TOTAL POSTS : 3093 WEDDING DATE: Oct 29, 2005

Posted: Sep 14, 2005 04:13 PM

Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

MY FMIL is hinting around (and straight out asking at this point) if she can be with me, my bridal party, and my mom on the morning of our wedding.

I am getting ready in my hotel room in the city with my bridal party and mom.

I feel that I really didn't want ANYONE from his family seeing me prior to the Church... Other than his sister, who is a bridesmaid. Is it unreasonable for me to feel this way? Anyone else feel this way?

What's customary?

103005FallBride Posted: Sep 14, 2005 04:15 PM+

103005FallBride MEMBER SINCE: 2/05 TOTAL POSTS : 7249 WEDDING DATE: Oct 30, 2005

Posted: Sep 14, 2005 04:15 PM

Re: Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

I do not feel you're being unreasonable at all. I agree with you. Me...it'll be just me and my Grandma.

Pmpkn087 Posted: Sep 14, 2005 04:34 PM+

Pmpkn087 MEMBER SINCE: 5/05 TOTAL POSTS : 876 WEDDING DATE: Nov 25, 2005

Posted: Sep 14, 2005 04:34 PM

Re: Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

I agree with you. Why wouldn't she want to be with her son? Plus, this moment is special to you and YOUR mom should be the one who is with you.

You should simply say 'I'm sorry, but I want those few hours to be shared with my mom and my bridal party.'

N.Y.bride Posted: Sep 14, 2005 05:13 PM+

N.Y.bride MEMBER SINCE: 3/05 TOTAL POSTS : 7207 WEDDING DATE: Jul 28, 2005

Posted: Sep 14, 2005 05:13 PM

Re: Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

I hate to disagree, but I think its a great time to include her.

Not saying you have to do it this way, but I could tell you she was so happy to be included and I think your MIL might be kind of hurt if not included especially if shes been hinting around to it.

The morning of my wedding all the guys got ready at my house and my mom, his mom, my BMs and I got ready at my moms house. We had a GREAT time!

Its your wedding and you should do what you really want. I just thought it was a nice thing to do.

ML110 Posted: Sep 14, 2005 05:44 PM+

ML110 MEMBER SINCE: 12/04 TOTAL POSTS : 1431 WEDDING DATE: Jun 25, 2005

Posted: Sep 14, 2005 05:44 PM

Re: Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

i know where you're coming from. luckily, i had an 'out'- my FMIL was staying at a hotel that was like 40 minutes from my house ( near the reception hall) so i told her ' i don't want you to get lost that morning trying to find your way to the hair salon that i'm going to, so here are the names of a couple hair salons closer to the hotel' LOL it worked out better anyway-- and i mean really, why wouldn't she want to be with her son?

Summer05 Posted: Sep 14, 2005 06:32 PM+

Summer05 MEMBER SINCE: 5/04 TOTAL POSTS : 3789 WEDDING DATE: Jul 01, 2005

Posted: Sep 14, 2005 06:32 PM

Re: Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

I got ready with my mom, BM's and my grandmother. DH got ready at our house with his boys. FMIL got ready at her house with her husband and other children.

Love_my_Freddybear Posted: Sep 14, 2005 07:03 PM+

Love_my_Freddybear MEMBER SINCE: 6/05 TOTAL POSTS : 2015 WEDDING DATE: Dec 03, 2005

Posted: Sep 14, 2005 07:03 PM

Re: Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

Posted by 103005FallBride

I do not feel you're being unreasonable at all. I agree with you. Me...it'll be just me and my Grandma.

AWH how sweet!!!!

12-3Princess Posted: Sep 15, 2005 10:14 AM+

12-3Princess MEMBER SINCE: 12/04 TOTAL POSTS : 3093 WEDDING DATE: Oct 29, 2005

Posted: Sep 15, 2005 10:14 AM

Re: Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

I'm thinking her son really needs her that morning . . . .

DAVALJO2 Posted: Sep 15, 2005 10:19 AM+

DAVALJO2 MEMBER SINCE: 10/04 TOTAL POSTS : 1296 WEDDING DATE: Oct 21, 2005

Posted: Sep 15, 2005 10:19 AM

Re: Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

Well this is her son's wedding, and maybe she wants to start bonding with her new daughter. Its harmless. If his sister can see you, so why can't his mother.

12-3Princess Posted: Sep 15, 2005 10:59 AM+

12-3Princess MEMBER SINCE: 12/04 TOTAL POSTS : 3093 WEDDING DATE: Oct 29, 2005

Posted: Sep 15, 2005 10:59 AM

Re: Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

Posted by DAVALJO2

Well this is her son's wedding, and maybe she wants to start bonding with her new daughter. Its harmless. If his sister can see you, so why can't his mother.

His sister is a close friend of mine and a bridesmaid. I want to spend the morning with my mom and bridal party. I think there's nothing wrong with it either.

bluesashbride Posted: Sep 15, 2005 11:25 AM+

bluesashbride MEMBER SINCE: 9/04 TOTAL POSTS : 2445 WEDDING DATE: May 21, 2005

Posted: Sep 15, 2005 11:25 AM

Re: Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

Posted by N.Y.bride

I hate to disagree, but I think its a great time to include her.

Not saying you have to do it this way, but I could tell you she was so happy to be included and I think your MIL might be kind of hurt if not included especially if shes been hinting around to it.

The morning of my wedding all the guys got ready at my house and my mom, his mom, my BMs and I got ready at my moms house. We had a GREAT time!

Its your wedding and you should do what you really want. I just thought it was a nice thing to do.

I completely agree with this!

italia6973 Posted: Sep 15, 2005 12:11 PM+

italia6973 MEMBER SINCE: 10/04 TOTAL POSTS : 1148 WEDDING DATE: Oct 22, 2005

Posted: Sep 15, 2005 12:11 PM

Re: Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

I think it also depends on your relationship with her too. If you get along with her and want her there thats great! I personally do not want mine with me the morning of. I also lost my mom 2 years ago so I really don't wnat his mom stepping in, plus I really don't like her at all! I'm just having my BM's and my aunts with me.

FunBride Posted: Sep 15, 2005 12:19 PM+

FunBride MEMBER SINCE: 8/04 TOTAL POSTS : 392 WEDDING DATE: Jul 30, 2005

Posted: Sep 15, 2005 12:19 PM

Re: Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

on my wedding day i wanted to be ALONE with my mom and grandmom. His mom knows me well enough to give me space. It's customary for the MIL to be with her son.

kam29 Posted: Sep 15, 2005 12:30 PM+

kam29 MEMBER SINCE: 7/05 TOTAL POSTS : 497 WEDDING DATE: Apr 29, 2006

Posted: Sep 15, 2005 12:30 PM

Re: Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

How does your FH feel about this?

12-3Princess Posted: Sep 15, 2005 01:29 PM+

12-3Princess MEMBER SINCE: 12/04 TOTAL POSTS : 3093 WEDDING DATE: Oct 29, 2005

Posted: Sep 15, 2005 01:29 PM

Re: Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

Posted by kam29

How does your FH feel about this?

He would like to spend the morning with his mom...

alex110879 Posted: Sep 15, 2005 01:31 PM+

alex110879 MEMBER SINCE: 8/04 TOTAL POSTS : 481 WEDDING DATE: Dec 30, 2005

Posted: Sep 15, 2005 01:31 PM

Re: Your Wedding Day and FMIL - - - -- repost from BHB

I am only considering it as to avoid having my fmil near my fh. They are a depressing family that harp on the dead and all she ever talks about is his late father who passed away 18 years ago. He has Crohns disease so whenever he gets upset he gets deathly ill, particularly when his father is mentioned, so that is why i am considering it, it is a good way of monitoring the things said.