Sticky situation

My fiance and I are really concerned that we are going to hurt a friend's feelings.

I've been friends with a pair of twins since I was a little girl. We have remained close all these years and my fiance has even gotten to know them quite well.

However, one of the twins is much closer to both my fiance and I. He is the one that we usually call to make plans or to seek advice from. He is one of my best friends and very close to my fiance. His brother usually tags along when we get together and is very dear to us, yet not quite as close.

My question is, how do we ask one brother to be in the wedding party and not the other? Though its apparent we are closer to one, I'm not sure that the other brother actually realizes that and we really don't want to hurt his feelings.

Any advice?

Re: Sticky situation

If it was me, honestly i would probably ask both.

Re: Sticky situation

I feel the same.. i'd have both

Re: Sticky situation

I'd ask both since they are both your friends and just not to cause hard feelings

Re: Sticky situation

I agree with above.

Re: Sticky situation

If you are truly closer to one more then the other, I'd say just ask the one brother and let the other brother have another task at the wedding such as handing out programs,etc.. include him in your wedding but not as a groomsman.

Re: Sticky situation

No way around it...ask both.

Re: Sticky situation

that is a hard situation, if i had to make that decision i would honestly just ask both, as to not harm anyones feelings and keep the peace...thats JIMHO tho

Re: Sticky situation

i would ask both - its only fair - do you have an extra girl to pair him with?

Re: Sticky situation

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Posted by Blu-ize

No way around it...ask both.

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i agree also

Re: Sticky situation

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Posted by lisaslove

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Posted by Blu-ize

No way around it...ask both.

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i agree also

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agree

Re: Sticky situation

I think you should just ask them both.

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i agree with the other girls...there really is no other way around it...you're going to have to ask both

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I would ask them both as well.

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I also agree...you should just ask them both

Re: Sticky situation

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Posted by Blu-ize

No way around it...ask both.

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I agree with her. Thats a tough thing to do.Good Luck!!

Re: Sticky situation

i would ask both!!!

Re: Sticky situation

If you don't have the room to ask both to be in the party, tell them both together that I only have room for one of you to be in the party so I am going to put both of your names in a hat and the name I pick out I would like to ask to be in the party, BUT before you talk to them you have to do a little setup. Put the name you want in the hat first, stick it to one side of the hat so you know where it is. Then when everybody is together make sure they see you write both of there names and put it in the hat, then when you pick out the name you pick the paper that was already in the hat stuck the the side and that is your person Then to play it safe right after you pick the name tell them you have to go to the bathroom and throw the names away.
Or
You can ask them both

Re: Sticky situation

It seems as if asking both is really not an option for you. I would tell both twins that they are very dear to you. Ask the one brother to be in the party and ask the other to do a reading. Good Luck!

Re: Sticky situation

Thanks to everyone who gave me advice, I'm going to have to keep thinking about this one until I really come up with a decision. I'll keep you posted. But please, I'd still like to get more opinions and hear different POVs. Thanks again...