I'm a bridezilla

Well last night FMIL told us that she would like to host rehersal dinner. She wants a guest list and wants to have control over the dinner. I freaked out. I don't want to give up any control over anything, my mom called me a bridezilla. I just don't understand why she needs our guest list. I know it is nice of her to offer but I'd rather her say here is some money to help pay for it, not give me your guest list. Am i a bridezilla!?

Re: I'm a bridezilla

Eek!
Unfortunately, if you want to know what ettiquette dictates, she is in the right.
If she is throwing the party, everything is up to her!
I say, take it as a gift. It sux to not be in control, but just think of it as a surprise party! You didn't plan your shower, right?

Re: I'm a bridezilla

You're not a bridezilla. Let her take some planning from you though. But if it adds too much stress, see if you can do it together. We found the place for the rehearsal dinner and signed the contract. The rest is up to FMIL. I'm glad I'm not dealing with it. Everyone is different.

Re: I'm a bridezilla

Try to think of it this way, she is paying for it and it's one more thing that you do not have to worry about planning. I know it's tough but really, it's just a dinner for the BP and immediate family, it's not something major like she is picking out your flowers for you and you have no say in it, I'd try to let it go.

Re: I'm a bridezilla

HOnestly... yes, I do think its a little bridezilla. If she is hosting and paying, its her call. Let her do it, you don't have to have control over every little thing.

Re: I'm a bridezilla

Re: I'm a bridezilla

I wouldn't call you a full-fledged bridezilla just yet, tho you're showing signs! You're FMIL is being very generous by wanting to host the RD, and sometimes they actually want to be a part of it rather than just hand over some $$, after all they're not a bank. I know it's tough to lose total control over something, but in the end it'll be nice to have one less thing to have to worry about. Let her do this for you and her son, it'll make her happy and will be a nice way of her welcoming you into the family.

Re: I'm a bridezilla

i asked my fmil for a list and i couldnt get it for months- and that made me irate
so just try to give her the list- she is paying - right? so let her have control over just this
i know its hard -this whole planning process is hard- so try to keep your cool

Re: I'm a bridezilla

Thanks everyone for your advice. I know I have to calm down a little. I always swore I'd be so laid back about everything, oh well! lol Thanks again girls!

Re: I'm a bridezilla

It's soooooooo hard to give up that control. It took almost a month for my MIL and DH to convince me to allow my FIL to do the envelopes for the invitations (I was in the process of packing my apartment and moving two weeks before invites had to go out). It was so hard to hand the guest list, addresses and envelopes over to him. But once I did I was so incredibly grateful for the help.

I say, let your FMIL do this, she obviously wants to. It's one less stressor off your back.

Re: I'm a bridezilla

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Posted by cindyandkevin

I wouldn't call you a full-fledged bridezilla just yet, tho you're showing signs! You're FMIL is being very generous by wanting to host the RD, and sometimes they actually want to be a part of it rather than just hand over some $$, after all they're not a bank. I know it's tough to lose total control over something, but in the end it'll be nice to have one less thing to have to worry about. Let her do this for you and her son, it'll make her happy and will be a nice way of her welcoming you into the family.

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I agree!

Re: I'm a bridezilla

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Posted by roxyspark

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Posted by cindyandkevin

I wouldn't call you a full-fledged bridezilla just yet, tho you're showing signs! You're FMIL is being very generous by wanting to host the RD, and sometimes they actually want to be a part of it rather than just hand over some $$, after all they're not a bank. I know it's tough to lose total control over something, but in the end it'll be nice to have one less thing to have to worry about. Let her do this for you and her son, it'll make her happy and will be a nice way of her welcoming you into the family.

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I agree!

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Me too! I was very happy to hear FILs wanted to take care of the RD. They asked if I had suggestions on places. I named a few that LIW girls suggested and that was it! They have been researching places more than I would have! And I feel such a relief that there is one less thing to do. You should try to enjoy the help!