Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

I know my younger sister. She always needs to be the center of attention. At family gathering she is always in the skin tight clothing and she is always drawing attention to her body. She is loud and obnoxious and she prides herself on being the skinniest person in the family -- to the point that when she heard that I had lost a few pounds... she went on one of her many starvation diets. I really think she will try to outdo me on my wedding day. In fact, i Know she will. This makes me so upset. I know she will tan herself so that she is more bronze than me, she will whiten her teeth, get the hightlights, lose more weight oh and she always flexes in pictures. This really upsets me. Did anyone ever have anyone like this (a sibling perhaps??) who made them feel the same way?

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

Oh my goodness that's horrible! Could you try speaking with her? Maybe she just needs a sister heart to heart........I went through that with my sis, I told her how important her being in my wedding was, and she calmed down a bit. She was getting really obnoxious with the whole planning. You're not alone!!

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

Sorry to hear about this. Have you always been rivals or is this something new when you got engaged?

You may want to clue your photographer in about her and let him handle it for pictures.

Maybe your mom could lend a hand?

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

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Posted by Blu-ize

Sorry to hear about this. Have you always been rivals or is this something new when you got engaged?

You may want to clue your photographer in about her and let him handle it for pictures.

Maybe your mom could lend a hand?

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Yeah, I am gonna have to clue the photographer, makeup and hair person, etc. She did it at my other sister's too. she was all over her bf and totally made a scene, acting more lovey than the bride and groom. whenever there is family functions, he is stroking her hair, kissing her, biting her shoulder, etc. She just needs to be the center.
Oh... side note, I think i am going with Jen, gotta fm you a pic but my pic size is too big

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

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Posted by LisaJill

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Posted by Blu-ize

Sorry to hear about this. Have you always been rivals or is this something new when you got engaged?

You may want to clue your photographer in about her and let him handle it for pictures.

Maybe your mom could lend a hand?

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Yeah, I am gonna have to clue the photographer, makeup and hair person, etc. She did it at my other sister's too. she was all over her bf and totally made a scene, acting more lovey than the bride and groom. whenever there is family functions, he is stroking her hair, kissing her, biting her shoulder, etc. She just needs to be the center.
Oh... side note, I think i am going with Jen, gotta fm you a pic but my pic size is too big

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Good to hear about Jen-can't wait to see a pic. have you decided about hair?

Can your mom step in about your sister? If not, you may need to. If you have to do it yourself, take her out to lunch and tell her about her behavior. Tell her that others have noticed and it looks immature and selfish. Ask her to put herself in others shoes. Maybe she'll open up about her insecurities and you can guide her as her older sis.

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

Although it will be 'annoying' I would be more concerned about how the guests are going to feel about it.

But again, try not to let you ruin your day. Like you say, clue in your vendors to only take 'requests' from you.

My boss' SIL, which she does not get along with at all, was trying to steel the show as well.

She was asking the photographer to take photos of her and her kids.

My boss has warned the photographer and he told her she had to ask the bride first. She said no since she was paying for the photos she did not any photos to be 'wasted' on things that were her about her wedding.

Hang in there..... and talk to her if she does behave.. Like 'grow up'!!

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

I think you should just ignore her... you are the bride and everyone will focus on you and your fh! She sounds like she has some insecurities issues... I'm not sure if confronting her would make the situation any better... she might deny everything and make a even bigger scene.

If she wants to highlight her hair, get a tan... have the whitest smile... so be it! Noone is going to say oh the bride little sister is more tan... has a brighter smile etc. They're going to be talking about how beautiful you look... how lovely your gown is... If she wants to be all lovely with her bf, blah... ppl will probably think it's gross or too busy dancing and having a good time!

Don't let her get you down!

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

nah....i doesn't matter what anyone else does...YOU ARE THE BRIDE!!!!

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

The pic is 1MB so it will not fit
My little sister will throw a tantrum if I even try to speak with her. I hate even being in the same room with her at this point. She makes a big point of eating nothing, she spends soo much time talking about herself and her medical school -- yep she is gonna be a doctor -- and she is just a total know it all. She has an opinion on everything and she is always right. She is my MOH and I have not told her about any of my planning because she is always telling me how wrong I am and how her opinion is sooo much better.
Do you know how to get pics sent that are too big?

Oh, I put a call into Nelza to get her prices. I really like her and I like her ideas.

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

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Posted by Blu-ize

Can your mom step in about your sister? If not, you may need to. If you have to do it yourself, take her out to lunch and tell her about her behavior. Tell her that others have noticed and it looks immature and selfish. Ask her to put herself in others shoes. Maybe she'll open up about her insecurities and you can guide her as her older sis.

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I agree, but whatever should happen, it is your day and no one is going to out shine the bride and groom!!! You will look amazing that day! I am so sorry that your sister acts like that and makes you feel this way!

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

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Posted by LisaJill

The pic is 1MB so it will not fit
My little sister will throw a tantrum if I even try to speak with her. I hate even being in the same room with her at this point. She makes a big point of eating nothing, she spends soo much time talking about herself and her medical school -- yep she is gonna be a doctor -- and she is just a total know it all. She has an opinion on everything and she is always right. She is my MOH and I have not told her about any of my planning because she is always telling me how wrong I am and how her opinion is sooo much better.
Do you know how to get pics sent that are too big?

Oh, I put a call into Nelza to get her prices. I really like her and I like her ideas.

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Ok then everybody should be on high alert to ignore her that day. Why is she your MOH?

Good to hear about Nelza. That girl rocks!

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

i think i know what you mean... i had a friend like that... she will buy more expensive clothes, wear higher heels, have nicer hair. I am in med school too, and a lot of us tend to be neurotic and obsessive. All you can do is feel sorry for her that she is so self involved that she cant truly care about other people and enjoy their moment.

Did you choose a dress for her yet? maybe you can pick out something conservative, yet pretty, for her to wear so she does not stand out so much? also, try not to tell her much about what you are doing to get ready, so she can't one-up you.

What do you mean by, 'she flexes in pictures'? what does she flex? that is tooooo funnny!
Make sure you tell the photographer not to take to many pics of her. When i had my sweet sixteen, one of my best friends was absolutely gorgeous, and the entire video was focused on her. i think my videographer had a crush.

good luck i feel your pain

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

My sister is not so bad but I always felt that because she is thinner thin me that she thinks she is better and when I do loose the weight she never gives compliments. I know how you feel. So annoying!

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

I have a worse one..

I think my MOTHER is trying to look better than me. She is going to this trainer and thats all she talks about and keeps saying she needs a hair and makeup trial.

UGH

Im trying to ignore her for now but I feel like a huge slacker bc I am so busy with grad school and teaching and wedding I havent been able to excersize.

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

That is horrible!! I feel so bad that she is doing that to you. Don't worry no one can out shine the bride on her wedding day. You will definitely stand out more and it will be your day only.

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

Well, first, I want to say, I am sorry you feel like this. YOU are the bride, so no matter how hard your sister tries, YOU are going to be the center of attention. Why are you letting her lifestyle consume you? If she gose on a diet because you lost weight, why does it matter? I say focus on your day, you are going to be the beautiful one in the white dress, not her.

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

You're the bride--no one will look more beautiful
than you

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

Well, my little sister tends to attract all of the attention when she walks into a room also because she's very pretty and has the perfect body (where is that vomit icon when you need it???). But she doesn't mean to do it so I can't really blame her. She's not obnoxious or conceited about it or anything. So in the back of my mind, I'm worried that she will 'steal my thunder' on the day of my wedding. Especially because she's my MOH and goes before me. But I can't get mad at her or ask her to uglify herself. So I will just grin and bear it...and tell the hair and makeup people to make sure to tone her down!

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

So sorry to hear this, No one can out do the Bride and Groom. I hate to think what she would be like while planning her own wedding. When she starts to get opinionated, tell her this is your wedding not hers. When you want her opinion, then you will ask for it. Don't be afraid to get nasty, sounds like she wants to be the boss and plan your whole wedding and take credit for it.

Re: Did anyone ever really believe you would have someone in your wedding party that wanted to look better than you?

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Posted by 7706bride

nah....i doesn't matter what anyone else does...YOU ARE THE BRIDE!!!!

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I agree! no one can take attention away from the bride!