a little vent

my fh has a sister who lives up in maine. all three of her kids live there too, one is living with a guy. so it's five people plus a baby. ok, that's a little background.

his sister was in nj when we got engaged. they then all got a std. they got an invite to my shower and they got an invite to the wedding. the women (2) didn't bother to rsvp for my shower. and now i find out that the only way they will come to the wedding is if someone pays for their bus ticket or picks them up (10 FRIGGIN HOURS AWAY!!!!).

these are people who have been on public assistance all their lives and who feel they are entitled to others taking care of them. ffil is always sending money for all sorts of bogus things. and i am SICK OF IT. i don't want ffil to shell out $600 for bus tickets and i don't want him (69 years old) to have to drive up there to pick them up and then again to take them home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I DON'T WANT THEM AT MY WEDDING!!!!!!!!!!!

i know fh wants his sister there, i obviously understand that. but if this grown woman hasn't been able to put the forethought into putting a FRIGGIN DOLLAR a week away to save for her little brother's wedding, then i don't want her or her family there.

i know that if i voice my opinion, i will come across as the snooty bride who thinks she's better than others.

Re: a little vent

I know what you're talking about. I went through a lot of people that didn't WANT to save in the 18 months before the wedding. Since it's your FH's family, let him deal with it. If they decide they want to help them, then so be it. But it'll be a family decision.

We also found out that we were happy for those that wanted to be at our wedding. Once we decided not be upset at those not there, we really enjoyed those that were there.

Re: a little vent

I can defintiely understand where you are coming from..but you have to talk to your FH about the situation...he hasn't voiced his opinion yet?

Re: a little vent

wow, now that is frustrating. it sounds like they just realized you are getting married. from personal experience, i would stay out and let your fh's family deal with it. if fh asks you for your thoughts, give them, but let him handle his family.

Re: a little vent

I would not say anything, other than you are not paying for their ticket down there. If they were to get married, would they send you $600 for the bus ticket? I think not.

If your inlaws are going to give in to them and send them the money, then that is their business...(even though in my opinion, it is just fueling the fire.)

Good luck, and don't worry whether they are coming to the wedding or not...just make sure your FH doesn't give them the money...cause once you give an inch, they'll take a mile.

Re: a little vent

the only thing i'm going to say is .... that i would feel terrible if ffil shelled out that money or had to do all that driving for 'just a party'

i'm not going to say anything else (PERIOD). let's just hope that my dominican/cuban attitude doesn't make me EXPLODE WITH MY TWO CENTS

Re: a little vent

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Posted by libby2595

the only thing i'm going to say is .... that i would feel terrible if ffil shelled out that money or had to do all that driving for 'just a party'

i'm not going to say anything else (PERIOD). let's just hope that my dominican/cuban attitude doesn't make me EXPLODE WITH MY TWO CENTS

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I'm Irish. Let me explode for you!

Re: a little vent

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Posted by waterspout4

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Posted by libby2595

the only thing i'm going to say is .... that i would feel terrible if ffil shelled out that money or had to do all that driving for 'just a party'

i'm not going to say anything else (PERIOD). let's just hope that my dominican/cuban attitude doesn't make me EXPLODE WITH MY TWO CENTS

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I'm Irish. Let me explode for you!

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let's just hope that my lack of enthusiasm gives fh the hint.

if not, i'll be sending a fm for us to explode in unison

Re: a little vent

I would say something to yout FH. I would let him and his family decide. But you are correct-they should have been saving all along-let them figure it out or don't come.