Any brides originall from the midwest? (little vent)

I just moved to this area about 2 years ago. I'm originally from Ohio then moved to S.C. for several years. NONE of my family is here. Trying to plan a wedding here when you're not used to the 'long island' way of weddings has been really interesting. I'm sort of taken aback by the rude things people say to me about midwesterners. I sort of treated it like a joke at first. Yes, I do know people who used a church basement for a reception hall. Yes, I have been to receptions (a long long time ago) that were just cake and punch. But jeez louise, the woman at Macy's actually said to me 'the mid-westerners just don't understand wedding etiquette' (!). I've had patients say to me that I should talk to my family so they don't look like 'hayseeds' at my reception. Uh, HELLO?, WE'RE NOT FROM APPALACHIA! Any other transplanted brides experiencing this? Do you let the comments pass? p.s. I could just be extra sensitive lately, I'm in severe patient burn-out, a several difficult patients last week put me on the edge

Re: Any brides originall from the midwest? (little vent)

I’m sorry that you are being treated like that by salespeople. Please excuse the rudeness of them....they do not know any better. Not everyone here in NY is a jerk!

People have to understand that in every part of the country weddings are celebrated in a different way. Some go all out like us here in NY/NJ and others just have cake and punch in a garden. Tell you the truth, if it was 'acceptable' to have just punch and cake in a garden, my husband and I would proberly have done that.

If I was treated like you were in a store, I would have asked to see the manager and told her/him what the comment is and then say if they didn’t know, the money used in the Midwest is the same as here in NY and now they wont see any of yours either!

I just can’t understand how people can be rude?!?!? >

Well, I hope that this incident doesn’t put a damper on the rest of your wedding planning! Enjoy every minute of it! This is a great website for advice and information!

Good Luck!
Lisa

Re: Any brides originall from the midwest? (little vent)

Hi. I am so sorry people have been saying such rude things to you!!! Welcome to NY. Although not all of us are rude, especially the wonderful ladies on this board.

I personally think a wedding is a wedding wether its cake & punch or 200 people & a huge reception hall. It's what you like, or what you can afford or what your culture is or whatever other reason, a wedding is a wedding. It is about 2 people who love each other so much, it's about celebrating your love & commitment.

I would love to be with you during the times people say this to you. My quick NY wit would definately put these people in their places once & for all!!

You should 'talk to your family so that they don't look like hayseeds?'!!! What the heck is a hayseed supposed to look like anyway??!! Some people just have no ettiquette themselves about life in general, no common courtesy and no brain!

You have a friend here! Feel free to vent to me or all of us anytime!

Re: Any brides originall from the midwest? (little vent)

Im not from Ohio but my husband is. They are from the Dayton area. Where are you from?

Ignore those mean crude people or blast them back if you like. They need a tase of their rudeness. They think that the NY Metro way of doing things is the norm throughtout the rest of the country.

Re: Any brides originall from the midwest? (little vent)

I'm sorry to say some people here are just plain rude. You should hear some of the things people said to me when I moved back to NY from Nashville. Makes you wonder if some of them were raised in a barn Just ignore them if they have that little class to say something like that then they really aren't worth your time, and with all the planning we have here - we don't have time to be bothered with petty people
Good Luck with your planning and we are always here to vent!

Re: Any brides originall from the midwest? (little vent)

I am new to this website and originally from Ohio as well. Go BUCKS!

I am so sorry to hear that you've unfortunately ran into some extremely rude people recently. As you know, we have them in the midwest too! Fortunately, we've encountered nothing but very friendly/helpful people to work with for our wedding planning so far. Have no fear, they do exist.

I think you'll find a lot of wonderful advice from this site regarding vendors to use (I've been checking it out for several weeks before joining). I'm sure we can all lend advice on vendors who will treat you with the respect you deserve, regardless of where you were born. Keep your chin up and focus on your special day. After all, that's all that truly matters.

Re: Any brides originall from the midwest? (little vent)

First of all - welcome to NY! Sorry to hear that you've had to deal with some ignorent people. Unfortunately, they do exist. Try to ignore them, they don't know what they are talking about anyway. Also, to keep your blood pressure down try avoid those types of people. As for patients, keep in mind that sometimes these people have a lot of other things going on and may not be the happiest people...

BTW - 2 of the most beautiful weddings I've gone to (and I've been to many) were in Ohio and North Carolina...

Re: Any brides originall from the midwest? (little vent)

This thread makes me feel so sad about where I am from! I understand completely about what you are going through. While I love my home state, I spent 3 years living in California, and I learned very quickly that NYers really do have a bad rep for being rude, know-it-all types in the eyes of the rest of the country.

I am sorry that you've been the target of some mean comments - obviously, those people are not the brightest bulbs! Please, try to ignore them and give the rest of us (who would like to help you plan) a chance to show you that NYers can have big hearts too!

Re: Any brides originall from the midwest? (little vent)

Thanks ladies for the pep talks! Sometimes I get a little overwhelmed and someone says something that rubs me the wrong way and....KABOOM! I get crazed. The women I work with have been great giving me pointers (long island 101 lol). Maybe drom time to time I'm going to have to post here to get the how-tos straight. BTW...atlastbride--GO BUCKEYES! I miss going to the games.

Re: Any brides originally from the midwest? (little vent)

FranM--I'm from the Columbus area (actually about 30 miles east of Columbus).

Re: Any brides originally from the midwest? (little vent)

I grew up in Michigan, and just about every wedding I went to there was an elegant affair at a country club with a live band. The main difference I've noticed is that in Michigan, guests gave gifts off the registery, cash was not the norm. And it wasn't until I'd moved east that I ever heard of the concept of 'covering the cost of the plate' - you just gave a nice gift based on what you could afford and your relationship to the bride or groom.

If you get a comment like you did from the saleswoman gave you, just look at her and flatly say, 'it seems some salespeople in NY don't understand etiquette either' then walk out.

Re: Any brides originally from the midwest? (little vent)

claud, i lived in california for 2 1/2 yrs also!
Where were you? I was in L.A.