So sad...

Hey girls....my best friend's dad died during the night last night and i am so beside myself. He was such a great man and the entire situation is just so sad. She was married last month, took a delayed honeymoon and just got back last tuesday. Thursday he was hospitalized and now he's gone. I am so, so sad for. This is supposed to be the happiest time in her life and my best friend's life and i dont even know what to do for her. I just sent an edible arrangement over to her moms where they all are. Any ideas? Oh and to make matters worse i will be able to go to the wake but not the burial because the burial is Monday and im a teacher so i cant take off that day....which is bothering me sooooooooooo much Sorry for the rambling im just so heartbroken for her.

Re: So sad...

Re: So sad...

My thoughts are with her and her family.

As silly as this will sound, it's coming from someone who lost a parent unexpectedly. I've been there and honestly, the best 'gift'/'thing' anyone did for us was this:

a family friend stopped by with 2 cases of bottled water, napkins, paper towels, toilet paper, tea bags, coffee, milk, paper plates, cups, plastic ware, sugar, etc.

She got us everything we would need as people stopped by to give their condolences and the things you might run out of. We ran out of toilet paper 2 days after my dad passed and I honestly can't imagine what it would have been like to run to to the grocery store.

It sounds silly but it's a nice gesture. Send a card, make a donation in her dad's name, take a care package, etc.

Just be a friend....that's all you can do.

Re: So sad...

oh how awful for your friend- its never the right time to lose a loved one- but at least she has you & her dh to lean on.

a lot of times its after the funeral/wake that it all sets in- while you are going through that stuff, everyone is around you and its not so hard- so I think just being there for her over the next couple weeks/months will mean the most

for her & her family

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when my best friend's dad died recently, i felt like my own dad died. i was there to see her through many good times it was tough to see her in so much pain

she is lucky to have a friend like you ....

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OMG i am so sorry for her loss!!!!

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Just be her friend. As upset as you are just let her know you are there.

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The best thing you can do for someone at a time like this is be there for them

Re: So sad...

That is horrible, and my heart goes out to your friend. the best thing you can do is be there for her constantly. Take the day off work Monday. I'm sorry, I'm a teacher too, you can. There is nothing more important than this. No administrator can punish you for going to a burial. I'm sorry to be blunt, but coming from someone who unexpectedly lost her father as well, you need to be there for your best friend. In 10 years your current principal might not know your name, but your best friend will either remember how you took off work to be with her, or how you didn't. I am so sorry if that sounds harsh.

I lost my dad 11 months before my wedding, he was 59 in perfect health. This is not something that anyone can or should get over quickly. Stress how lucky she was to have him at her wedding, and to have him for as long as she did. Nothing will really help now, but being there is important.

Good luck, and I know this will be a rough Thanksgiving, but she is lucky to have friends who care. Really, trust me about taking off on Monday -- you'll really feel good about it.

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This is terrible. This is the third death I've heard of in two days!
So sad.

I will absolutely add her to list of prayers.

Linda just be a friend, it's all you can do.

Re: So sad...

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Posted by MsPotterhead

That is horrible, and my heart goes out to your friend. the best thing you can do is be there for her constantly. Take the day off work Monday. I'm sorry, I'm a teacher too, you can. There is nothing more important than this. No administrator can punish you for going to a burial. I'm sorry to be blunt, but coming from someone who unexpectedly lost her father as well, you need to be there for your best friend. In 10 years your current principal might not know your name, but your best friend will either remember how you took off work to be with her, or how you didn't. I am so sorry if that sounds harsh.

I lost my dad 11 months before my wedding, he was 59 in perfect health. This is not something that anyone can or should get over quickly. Stress how lucky she was to have him at her wedding, and to have him for as long as she did. Nothing will really help now, but being there is important.

Good luck, and I know this will be a rough Thanksgiving, but she is lucky to have friends who care. Really, trust me about taking off on Monday -- you'll really feel good about it.

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I'm a teacher too and ITA
Take off Monday -- your friend needs you.

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so sorry

Re: So sad...

Oh my goodness- I'm so sorry!!!!

Re: So sad...

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Posted by FutureMrsCarrieri

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Posted by MsPotterhead

That is horrible, and my heart goes out to your friend. the best thing you can do is be there for her constantly. Take the day off work Monday. I'm sorry, I'm a teacher too, you can. There is nothing more important than this. No administrator can punish you for going to a burial. I'm sorry to be blunt, but coming from someone who unexpectedly lost her father as well, you need to be there for your best friend. In 10 years your current principal might not know your name, but your best friend will either remember how you took off work to be with her, or how you didn't. I am so sorry if that sounds harsh.

I lost my dad 11 months before my wedding, he was 59 in perfect health. This is not something that anyone can or should get over quickly. Stress how lucky she was to have him at her wedding, and to have him for as long as she did. Nothing will really help now, but being there is important.

Good luck, and I know this will be a rough Thanksgiving, but she is lucky to have friends who care. Really, trust me about taking off on Monday -- you'll really feel good about it.

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I'm a teacher too and ITA
Take off Monday -- your friend needs you.

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Im so sorry to hear about your dad I really cant take off monday not only because of the administrators but its more so because Tuesday starts a 4 day trip with my students amd on Monday i have activities and info to go over with them that a sub just cant do. I'm trying to be able to just make it to the mass by getting coverage for during the time of the mass. The burial is out at Calverton and the ceremony out there is so quick so i figure its more important to be at the mass.
Ive been speaking to her multiple times a day and i think i may actually be seeing her and her fam tonight. Ill keep u guys updated. Thanks so much ladies!!

Re: So sad...

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Posted by JoesFutureWife

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Posted by FutureMrsCarrieri

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Posted by MsPotterhead

That is horrible, and my heart goes out to your friend. the best thing you can do is be there for her constantly. Take the day off work Monday. I'm sorry, I'm a teacher too, you can. There is nothing more important than this. No administrator can punish you for going to a burial. I'm sorry to be blunt, but coming from someone who unexpectedly lost her father as well, you need to be there for your best friend. In 10 years your current principal might not know your name, but your best friend will either remember how you took off work to be with her, or how you didn't. I am so sorry if that sounds harsh.

I lost my dad 11 months before my wedding, he was 59 in perfect health. This is not something that anyone can or should get over quickly. Stress how lucky she was to have him at her wedding, and to have him for as long as she did. Nothing will really help now, but being there is important.

Good luck, and I know this will be a rough Thanksgiving, but she is lucky to have friends who care. Really, trust me about taking off on Monday -- you'll really feel good about it.

---

I'm a teacher too and ITA
Take off Monday -- your friend needs you.

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Im so sorry to hear about your dad I really cant take off monday not only because of the administrators but its more so because Tuesday starts a 4 day trip with my students amd on Monday i have activities and info to go over with them that a sub just cant do. I'm trying to be able to just make it to the mass by getting coverage for during the time of the mass. The burial is out at Calverton and the ceremony out there is so quick so i figure its more important to be at the mass.
Ive been speaking to her multiple times a day and i think i may actually be seeing her and her fam tonight. Ill keep u guys updated. Thanks so much ladies!!

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Thank you!
Im sorry if I sounded judgemental, I didn't mean to be -- I just wanted to stress how you could take the day off if you really wanted to. Do what you feel comfortable doing. I think its a great idea to get coverage for part of the day.
You're obviously a good friend that your friend is lucky to have.

Re: So sad...

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Posted by MsPotterhead

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Posted by JoesFutureWife

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Posted by FutureMrsCarrieri

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Posted by MsPotterhead

That is horrible, and my heart goes out to your friend. the best thing you can do is be there for her constantly. Take the day off work Monday. I'm sorry, I'm a teacher too, you can. There is nothing more important than this. No administrator can punish you for going to a burial. I'm sorry to be blunt, but coming from someone who unexpectedly lost her father as well, you need to be there for your best friend. In 10 years your current principal might not know your name, but your best friend will either remember how you took off work to be with her, or how you didn't. I am so sorry if that sounds harsh.

I lost my dad 11 months before my wedding, he was 59 in perfect health. This is not something that anyone can or should get over quickly. Stress how lucky she was to have him at her wedding, and to have him for as long as she did. Nothing will really help now, but being there is important.

Good luck, and I know this will be a rough Thanksgiving, but she is lucky to have friends who care. Really, trust me about taking off on Monday -- you'll really feel good about it.

---

I'm a teacher too and ITA
Take off Monday -- your friend needs you.

---

Im so sorry to hear about your dad I really cant take off monday not only because of the administrators but its more so because Tuesday starts a 4 day trip with my students amd on Monday i have activities and info to go over with them that a sub just cant do. I'm trying to be able to just make it to the mass by getting coverage for during the time of the mass. The burial is out at Calverton and the ceremony out there is so quick so i figure its more important to be at the mass.
Ive been speaking to her multiple times a day and i think i may actually be seeing her and her fam tonight. Ill keep u guys updated. Thanks so much ladies!!

---

Thank you!
Im sorry if I sounded judgemental, I didn't mean to be -- I just wanted to stress how you could take the day off if you really wanted to. Do what you feel comfortable doing. I think its a great idea to get coverage for part of the day.
You're obviously a good friend that your friend is lucky to have.

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Thank you sweetie...you didnt sound judgemental at all. I just feel like im stuck between a rock and a hard place. I will do anything i can to help her thru this time. Shes a great friend too. I spoke to her a little while ago and she seems to be a little bit less numb. We were even able to joke around a little. I know this is going to be a very bumpy road for her, probably for the rest of her life.