I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

So what do you do when your future mother in law picks a fight with her son over several problems all having to do with me!
I find out that for four years she has been fake with me. That she has problems with my attitude, behavior and she thinks I am too controlling!!!
What do I do? She even went so far as to say she doesn't think our marriage will last!
I so angry and sick to my stomache! Help me!


Pamela

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

That's terrible - I'm so sorry. The only think I can think to do would be maybe try to sit down and talk to her in a few days and see what the problem is - if it was somethign you did specifically...or if the whole thing was taken out of context!
Good luck though!

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

Do not let this woman ruin your future with your fiance. You must talk to FH though. Make sure you two are in this together and he defends you to all ends. It will be hard, but work on having a cordial relationship with her. You donot have to be the best of friends, but enough to get you through family functions, and such.

I know this really hurts. To be honest with you FH's dad does not really care for me. It used to bother me for years- but one day I just said scre*w him, I am with his son not him.

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

Im so sorry. Can you talk to her, and find out why she doesnt like you??

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

I would tell her to go FU*K herself, get a life, and mind her business..

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

I like Marcellabella's response!!!!

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

What has your FH said?

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

I just wanted to send out some

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

I don't think there's too much you can do it's really her problem not yours - sounds like she's the one with the controlling issues! I agree with Marcella

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

I definately agree with Marcella...

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

i like marcellabellas response

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

Marcella hit the nail on the head!!! Cut her out of your life and move on!

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

I can certainly sympathize and know it really hurts. I had always hoped that I would get along great with the mother of the son I would marry. Unfortunately when they make up their minds that they are not going to like anyone who marries their son, there is nothing you can do.

I agree that it is important that the FH acknowledges the issue and supports you 100%. I can tell you that there is nothing more frustrating than a FH who tells you that it's your imagination when his mother is blasting your relationship during Christmas dinner in front of both you and him or when she tells both of you to your face that she does not want you to get married or have children because she doesn't want to be a grandmother. I hope you have more support from your FH in that respect than I do.

Hang in there. My mother did the same thing to my brother ten years and three children ago and they are still going strong. It's just a mother/son thing.

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

Dont feel so bad about yourself, there are some mothers who feel that no woman is EVER good enough for thier son! This is her problem, she has issues about her son loving you so much, it 'takes away' from the attention he spends on her. I would definitly talk to FH about how you will handle her in the future. You are going to be his wife, and you will be his family. He has to stand by your side 100% and not give in to his mothers pettyness. Good luck, and I am sure things will work out.\

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

Another vote for Marcellas advice

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

yup, marcella said it best

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

what do you and your DH think? Do you believe in your marriage? Why did your FMIL say this and how did you find out?
If you and your FH want this relationship to work then only the two of you can make it work. I would also be very, very hurt and truthfully his mother should know that you are upset and cannot believe she would say such things.
I really wish you luck with this situation because there is no easy answer here.

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

I would make the first attempt to try to find out what the underlying issues are. If she continues to act the way she is doing, you should Act as if none of this bothers you! Some FMIL's love it when they know they have gotten to you! It's almost like you fell into their trap. I wish you the best of luck!

Re: I just found out my future mother in law doesn't like me!

yea Marcella has it right on.. however, she is your hubby's mom so its not like she is gonna disappear. you might have to make face when you see her :-(