Some upsetting news about my MOH, and need some opinions

She just told me that she is going back to Austraila (sp) for her masters which is great, but she is leaving in January and coming back a week before my wedding. I don't expect her to stop her life for me and I am happy that she is going on for her masters and I had a feeling that she would go back there but I didnt know it would be this soon. Now by her going she will be missing my bridal shower and bacholette party. She feels like she is being a bad MOH because she hasnt been around at all (she finished her last semester of school in Austriala) and she wants me to put someone else in her place. What would you do in this postion.

Re: Some upsetting news about my MOH, and need some opinions

It sounds like you don't want to replace her, but she feels bad and feels that she should be.

But I don't think she will need to be replaced. It will be upsetting that she won't be able to make your shower and bach. party, but if you want her to be your MOH then keep her

Re: Some upsetting news about my MOH, and need some opinions

No, i wouldnt - you picked her for a reason, right? so excuse her for her absense b/c its not done for a bad reason. You love her and she loves you- why replace? that is like replacing your husband or boyfriend b/c they are away on business for a long time or even in the army.
JMO

Re: Some upsetting news about my MOH, and need some opinions

first I would tell her that I would never had asked her if I thought our friendship would eve change, and even thought she may be moving, that I still value her as a friend. if she still does not want to be the MOH, I would ask her to be at least a BM, and if still no, then I would respect it and not pressure her.

Re: Some upsetting news about my MOH, and need some opinions

have you thought about having 2 MOH's, so you have one with you for your shower and all?

Re: Some upsetting news about my MOH, and need some opinions

I couldn't replace her, i just wanted to know what everyone else thought. I couldn't imagine putting some else in her shoes, it just hurts knowing she wont be there for another mile stone in my life considering we were planning our weddings in high school together.

Re: Some upsetting news about my MOH, and need some opinions

then definetly talk to her and tell her you want her there no matter what and the rest will work out. traditions have gone out the window. under the circumstance, there is not reason the other BM can't do the shower & BParty details.

Re: Some upsetting news about my MOH, and need some opinions

Honestly..I would sit down with her and see where she stands as far as WANTING to be the MOH...if she insists you give the honor/duty away since she won't be here and you don't want to give her up...why don't you pull in a CO-MOH that can help her out....or bump her down to a bridesmaid.....I know it sounds harsh, but if she doesn't or can't do it, I wouldn't force her to.