Help me (us) be more social!!! (Vent, longish)

OK so DH and I have been married for 4months (YAY!!), yet we have developed a rut of staying in. I tend to be very active in warm weather, always wanting to travel and hang out with friends and family. DH is and always has been a homebody. He usually chills in the house, studying, playing video games, or on the computer.

All of a sudden, I get a reality check from my sis that we are ...boring!! If I don't have anything to do or come down to LI (no one will come to us because...'it's too far' or 'I don't want to drive 2hrs, why don't you come here?'), I basically stay home. I'll go shopping (with no money) sometimes, but generally, we rarely do ANYTHING!!!!

I'm not a cold weather person at all. I love the warmth. But there has to be something that DH and I can do to be more social, especially now.

I hate to admit it but I have a hard time making and keeping friends. The ones I have I keep close to me but they all live far away (LI, PA, MD) and it's not very easy to meet up. I live in Newburgh, which is completely new to me. I don't know anyone here and have a hard time with rejection...Part of me regrets moving so far away, but I couldn't afford to stay on LI and there were no job opportunities for me there.

It sucks but I need some help from you all. What can DH and I do to be more social?

Thanks ladies

Re: Help me (us) be more social!!! (Vent, longish)

Aww, I feel your pain ... Most of my good friends are over an hr away from me, and I lose touch with a lot of people too. Honestly, I feel lonely alot bc of it. Why don't you try a local bowling team or dance class? You are bound to strike up conversation with someone in that kind of environment.

Re: Help me (us) be more social!!! (Vent, longish)

All of my friends live all over the county- and most of DH's live in FL or elsewhere. Our bridal party was a MESS trying to get everyone together and on the same page- it took endless emails and countless hours.

A. You're not boring- it's just not your time of year.
B. Start a book club or search for one in your area
C. take a class, yoga, cooking, photo- this is a sure fire way to meet people.

Wait till you have kids- I always hear that parents team up and make friends with other parents!!

Hang in there and who cares what your sister says!

Re: Help me (us) be more social!!! (Vent, longish)

Danielle...we stay in a lot, too! Come chill with us! We love you!

Re: Help me (us) be more social!!! (Vent, longish)

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Posted by IrishAli

Danielle...we stay in a lot, too! Come chill with us! We love you!

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WE STILL HAVE TO!!!!!!!!!!!! One day we will meet up! Love you too!!!

Re: Help me (us) be more social!!! (Vent, longish)

Yea winter is not our time of year either...I hate the cold...and I think most people become homebodies during the winter.


Is there someone at work that you are DH have become close with? Try to have a dinner date with them and sometimes one close couple may lead to relationships with other people or couples.

This is a concern that I have once we end up looking for a house. Being far from our family and friends. But it's so expensive around here that I can't see us affording a house in the city near the friends we have now.

Re: Help me (us) be more social!!! (Vent, longish)

DH and I had the same problem, so we joined a bowling league! We met a ton of awesome people through it- we actually had a table at our wedding just for our bowling peeps

Re: Help me (us) be more social!!! (Vent, longish)

Do you have any hobbies or particular interests? Look at meetup.com - they have groups that meet for all kinds of activities and you might find something in your area that interests you and gets you out of the house and meeting new people

Re: Help me (us) be more social!!! (Vent, longish)

Why not check the local paper for craft fairs or cooking classes or something like that .... it might help you meet people

Joining the local gym and taking the same classes week after week can help you meet people too

Re: Help me (us) be more social!!! (Vent, longish)

DH and I have this problem sometimes too - but we LOVE the cold. We are in the Northwest Bronx - near Riverdale and no one comes up here even though it's a 5 minute walk from the subway. We take the zipcar up to Hudson County sometimes to hang out in the quaint towns. Do you guys love road trips?

We found a local bar that we've mad a lot of friends at and try to stay active at church.

Re: Help me (us) be more social!!! (Vent, longish)

we're kinda in the same boat since we moved to a brand new city right before the wedding. (we're in houston now) one thing we've been doing that has helped us meet people is livingsocial adventures. there outings or activities that are usually done in a big group. like i said we're in a big city so im not sure if living social has any by you buts it worth a try. so far we took a sailing class and a sushi making class. for me the sushi making was more fun because it was in a really cool restaurant downtown and there were drinks and it felt like more of a night out, which was just what i needed.

Re: Help me (us) be more social!!! (Vent, longish)

We'd be homebodies in the winter too, but we try to do date night. We really love to eat and try new restaurants, so we do that. Yea, it costs money, but we try to make up for it by cutting back on other stuff.