Re: HELP! my Dad wants to bring....

---

Posted by eroxgirl

I think you have every right not to want your dad's GF there, but allow me to offer a little perspective from the other side. My mom has been with her boyfriend about 11 years now. His wife passed away a little less than a year before they started dating so naturally, it was extremely hard on his children to accept my mom into their life. They put my mother through a lot, and put me through even more. 11 years have passed and I am and probably will always be very resentful towards these people for how I was treated by them.

I think your dad might feel like you're rejecting his girlfriend and is trying to force you to accept her. I believe his GF needs a chance from you and your siblings - which I totally think you ARE DOING by allowing her to come to your wedding. Maybe you can sit down and have a talk with him and explain that you realize she is important to him, and are willing to include her/get to know her better, but he needs to let you do it at your own pace, and that you're still grieving your mother.

---

This is worth thinking about... interesting perspective....

Re: HELP! my Dad wants to bring....

I have meet her- she isn't my cup of tea- personally I think she is digging for gold

and my Dad is the perfect sucker- she didn't have a job when they meet- and not doesn't plan on getting one- my Dad wines and dines her, bought a boat b/c she likes boats- and is going down to FLA with her next month to look at houses for the winter- that I am sure he is paying for- ( he hated FLA last year)

My Dad treats my little sister really crappy- ditching her to spend 5 to 6 nights a week with this woman- and leaves my little sister with no food for dinner- and then yells at her when she charges it to him- my sister is still in school and lives at home- she shouldn't have to buy dinner and eat alone every night-

I invited her to the wedding- but to be honest I don't plan on making a huge effort to have her be apart of my life- I understand were my Dad is coming from- but he just doesn't want to be alone-

If he would waited a little longer- things might have been different- but IMO this relationship is moving at mock 5- and that is too fast for me

Re: HELP! my Dad wants to bring....

Your wedding must be a very emotional time for your whole family and it sounds like your dad doesn't want to be there alone and perhaps doesn't want people to glance over at him at your wedding and make pity comments. Instead he will have them whispering about his new gold-digger GF.

Does your dad have any siblings who might talk to him and make him realize how this is stressing you?

Re: HELP! my Dad wants to bring....

I am sure your plans have been bittersweet. I certainly understand how you must be feeling having just lost Dad in the beginning of the summer. As much as your Mom may have wanted your Dad to be happy, I am sure she wanted YOU to be happy too. Her child's feelings should come before that of your Dad's new girlfriend. If it upsets you this much, then have your father tell her to stay back. If they were married, it might be different. But sometimes there are places where a GF should know her place. You are not HER daughter and SHE is not helping you make the wedding. You will do the right thing.