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Wedding Forums > Brides Helping Brides ™ > Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.
Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.
dgtlsunshine Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:14 PM+
dgtlsunshine MEMBER SINCE: 12/01 TOTAL POSTS : 2838 WEDDING DATE: Jul 07, 2002
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:14 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

Michelle you are hilarious. I wish that was the way weddings were done.
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Misty Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:18 PM+
Misty MEMBER SINCE: 9/02 TOTAL POSTS : 8409 WEDDING DATE: Jun 20, 2010
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:18 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

Can I be honest here, this is the same reason I hate those 'mailboxes' that are made for receptions. I know a lot of girls on the site are going to use them, but JMHO, it implies this same thing. I went to one wedding where they used it, and someone at my table actually walked up and inserted a dollar!
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Miro127 Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:19 PM+
Miro127 MEMBER SINCE: 7/02 TOTAL POSTS : 1460 WEDDING DATE: Aug 02, 2003
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:19 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

i agree it'd be tacky to put that on the invite, but im glad you came here and asked the question! it will probably help out some othe brides and now you have a good sampling of people's opinions (no matter how 'harsh' some of them may have sounded!).
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Scoop Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:20 PM+
Scoop MEMBER SINCE: 5/02 TOTAL POSTS : 3687 WEDDING DATE: Nov 02, 2002
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:20 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

If people ask you, maybe you can hint that you have already received your necessary gifts for your shower. Otherwise, just bite the bullet. Most people give cash anyway.
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SomedayBride Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:20 PM+
SomedayBride MEMBER SINCE: 5/02 TOTAL POSTS : 2051 WEDDING DATE: Jan 01, 1995
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:20 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

we'll say we prefer a monetary donation but it doesnt really matter to us.
Donation? How about gift? In all seriousness, in NY, you'll get more cash gifts than gift gifts, so don't worry about it.
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EvenEdan Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:23 PM+
EvenEdan MEMBER SINCE: 11/02 TOTAL POSTS : 3110 WEDDING DATE: Nov 27, 2004
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:23 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

I don't care for those mailboxes either, but they certainly aren't as blatant as stating money is preferred on the invite.
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beachbride04 Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:31 PM+
beachbride04 MEMBER SINCE: 1/03 TOTAL POSTS : 279 WEDDING DATE: Sep 25, 2004
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:31 PM bride-minus.png

.

.

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balilove Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:31 PM+
balilove MEMBER SINCE: 12/02 TOTAL POSTS : 1489 WEDDING DATE: Aug 30, 2003
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:31 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

Shaini, we are not trying to jump down your throat, sorry if it sounds that way. You are doing the right thing by not putting it on the invit. On a funny note, I went to a wedding in the Midwest once, being from NY and always giving money when I got to the reception I noticed that several of the people were carrying gifts that looked like Pyrex dishes. When we went to the buffet line to eat, the food was in something that looked like a trough, the cake was already cut and wrapped in a napkin. The icing was all over the napkin--nasty. I looked at my boyfriend at the time and said, 'hold me down honey or I am going to run back to that gift table for my card---I put $200 in it and that was in the early 90's---he said..'I'll race you...'
Take it in stride you will get plenty of money on LI, for some reason it is the way of the wedding there.
Good Luck!!!
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Jenn524 Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:33 PM+
Jenn524 MEMBER SINCE: 1/03 TOTAL POSTS : 4170 WEDDING DATE: May 24, 2003
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:33 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

You could also register at a place like Bed Bath & Beyond and then return the gifts for the cash. You will most likely wind up with cash and a couple of people may give you gifts. From what I hear money is the most popular gifts and a lot of people know that in today's day the couple is paying for the wedding.
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Bride2be03 Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:37 PM+
Bride2be03 MEMBER SINCE: 10/02 TOTAL POSTS : 642 WEDDING DATE: Oct 04, 2003
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:37 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

YOU WILL PROBABLY GET MOSTLY MONEY ANYWAY.
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wacky Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:58 PM+
wacky MEMBER SINCE: 11/02 TOTAL POSTS : 9976 WEDDING DATE: Jun 21, 2003
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 05:58 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

Dont ever ask for anything on ivitation, its not very proper.

JMO
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Misty Posted: Jan 14, 2003 06:00 PM+
Misty MEMBER SINCE: 9/02 TOTAL POSTS : 8409 WEDDING DATE: Jun 20, 2010
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 06:00 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

If you want, you can have my FMIL. She ran around telling everyone she invited to our EParty that 'the kids need cash!'!

Totally mortified.
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gracejilly Posted: Jan 14, 2003 06:53 PM+
gracejilly MEMBER SINCE: 1/02 TOTAL POSTS : 275 WEDDING DATE: Mar 30, 2003
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 06:53 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.




Welcome to the board American Police...
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07052002 Posted: Jan 14, 2003 06:59 PM+
07052002 MEMBER SINCE: 5/02 TOTAL POSTS : 384 WEDDING DATE: Sep 27, 2002
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 06:59 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

Gracejilly, you should probably just forum mail Susan rather then post, that is being just as rude as you think she was..
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Sonicstef Posted: Jan 14, 2003 07:00 PM+
Sonicstef MEMBER SINCE: 2/01 TOTAL POSTS : 8405 WEDDING DATE: Oct 05, 2002
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 07:00 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

Grace: I dont think this is an area where anything less than harsh words are in order. Asking for gifts at all in an invitation (cash or otherwise) is not appropriate. In terms of etiquette, there really are no ifs,ands or butts about this topic.

Since the original question was
What is the nicest way to ask for money instead of gifts on the invitation?
it certainly sounded like she had already decided to ask on the invitation and was looking for input on how to word it nicely. I think Susans was just trying to get the message across as clearly as possible.
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gracejilly Posted: Jan 14, 2003 07:05 PM+
gracejilly MEMBER SINCE: 1/02 TOTAL POSTS : 275 WEDDING DATE: Mar 30, 2003
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 07:05 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

Kinder words can get a point across just as clearly...


Let's agree to disagree....Peace.
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antoinette Posted: Jan 14, 2003 07:07 PM+
antoinette MEMBER SINCE: 5/02 TOTAL POSTS : 1638 WEDDING DATE: Oct 20, 2002
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 07:07 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

sorry- i wouldnt indicate this on the invite- you might wind up with nothing at all. I definelty wanted money instead of gifts and i basically got just that. I think i got 2 presents in addition to money- but basically everyone gave money- and i didnt say anything before hand.
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Fletch Posted: Jan 14, 2003 07:59 PM+
Fletch MEMBER SINCE: 11/02 TOTAL POSTS : 989 WEDDING DATE: Sep 27, 2003
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 07:59 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

Although I agree that putting this on the invitation is inappropriate, I do think that americanpolice was only asking for advice and some of the responses were harsh. Everyone is entitled to their opinion but some of the responses could have been nicer. JMO
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americanpolice Posted: Jan 14, 2003 08:17 PM+
americanpolice MEMBER SINCE: 1/03 TOTAL POSTS : 95 WEDDING DATE: Sep 27, 2003
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 08:17 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

its ok. i was just lookin for advice. lets not make a bigger issue over this topic any longer. thanks.
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dgtlsunshine Posted: Jan 14, 2003 09:08 PM+
dgtlsunshine MEMBER SINCE: 12/01 TOTAL POSTS : 2838 WEDDING DATE: Jul 07, 2002
Posted: Jan 14, 2003 09:08 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Nice way to ask for money instead of gifts.

Good I am glad you found no offense b/c I definately did not mean any harm. You will be fine. 500 people wedding plenty of cash coming your way anyway.
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