Re: NWR: FH VENT!!!!(sorry long post)

I can sympathize - my FI goes on a Myrtle Beach Golf trip every year too, although they didn't go this year. They seem to forget the way to treat us very quickly! Good for you for standing up for yourself. You should never feel taken for granted. I hope the talk goes well and he realizes how he's been and changes. Good luck.

Re: NWR: FH VENT!!!!(sorry long post)

all i know is that since we've been engaged, the fighting has escalated. i think its normal, between living together and learning about each others positions on matters like money and priorities of time, its a tough time some days.

my advice is if you want a resolution and not a fight is to make sure you are both calm and stay on the issue. every time the FH and i have blow up its because we're not fighting fair, and we're not really getting the good conversation part going-we just start getting emotional- and that's never good.

but i hear your vent! and i'm so glad we have a board we can kinda go to like this to sound off and simmer down and get some good advice about situations. plus, its not like theknot where you get stomped on for even having a problem. i hate visiting that site-girls are so mean to each other!

Re: NWR: FH VENT!!!!(sorry long post)

I agree Bluesash- without you guys I would go nuts
Thanks for all the support. BTW- the interview went great! If the budget isn't frozen, the superintendent doesn't insist on hiring a guy(two women run the place now), and my boss releases me from my contract at the middle school, I will have a new job with a raise!

As you can tell, I am focusing on the postives today and ignoring FH problem. I think will avoid all conversation until after my weekend away. I deserve a break!

Re: NWR: FH VENT!!!!(sorry long post)

oh god I remember when we first moved in together, we fought all the time...
that is a great news Christine, keeping my fingers crossed for you

Re: NWR: FH VENT!!!!(sorry long post)

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Posted by ckgmwedding

for all of you wonderful suppportive females! He did call, only after I left an incredibly pissed off message telling him Thanks for calling and letting me know you are alive. And the call came at 1:00 am- MY TIME! He was like, hi! I was soooo angry, when he said I love you, I just hung up. I just can't believe he would wake me up just so he could feel better. Especially when I have an interview this morning for a promotion in my school district.

He is Mytle Beach by the way, so sorry Aga- I wish you could go beat him up!

I don't care about the strip club stuff, that never bothers me since it is really not his thing. But with this behavior, I now am starting to wonder what else is new with Mr. Incredible.

Then he calls this morning- He and his friend laughing it up in the background- HI honey, I love you, I am so lucky to have you, like this is going to make it all better. I was not nice.
I said I love you- halfheartly and he was like, you don't sound like you mean it. I told him we would talk later and he said- you can talk now, this guy is like my brother. I told him- later- let him sweat it. He wished me luck on my interview and that was it.

SO I am still pissed off and we will be having a major talk, not just about this but about everything lately. He's just not the same loving person I got engaged to and I feel taken for granted at this point. It will change or he will not like the person he is with.
SO there is my very long and pathetic tale. I know it can't be like it was in the beginning but all I am asking for is a little consideration.

Thank you all for listening. I really needed that.

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Make sure you calm way down before you talk. And keep your objective in mind: do you want the same loving person back that you fell in love with, or is it just important that you get across how pissed you were? Learn how to talk it out calmly now, or if you just get pissed and turned off every time he screws up, it will set a big precedent. As a result, he may not come to you with important stuff or start to be dishonest about certain things in an effort not to make you angry.

And I'm sure he really does love you. Guys are so clueless sometimes, and they tend to take you for granted without meaning to. Everything will be alright.

Re: NWR: FH VENT!!!!(sorry long post)

OH Chris,

Re: NWR: FH VENT!!!!(sorry long post)

Re: NWR: FH VENT!!!!(Update)

So after three days of fighting on the phone, asking about the infamous night when he didn't call over and over, we made up yesterday. I just miss him so much. But then I couldn't help myself and starting in on him again last night. Men are so dumb- he should not have bragged how he won the golf tournment the morning after we had the huge fight. I told him I guess he needs to ignore me and go to strip clubs more often and his game will really take off!

I realize that this will not be resolved until he gets home. Now at least the 'boy's' weekend is over and he is on business in Atlanta and miserable. It should make me feel better but it doesn't. So I just being civil on the phone until he gets home. Of course my parents arrive for a visit the next day. I'll keep you posted.
Thanks for all of the hugs....