Re: would you go to an OOT wedding the weekend before your wedding?

oops... duplicate post somehow.

Re: would you go to an OOT wedding the weekend before your wedding?

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Posted by stealthgroom

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Posted by Kara and Todd

I just feel guilty skipping someone's wedding, I guess, even if it's someone I don't know and FH doens't care for.

I think we're also both annoyed that we now have to invite 12 extra people to our wedding (at least 6 guys + guests).

We were trying to cut down on strangers at the wedding as best we could, though we know it's inevitable... and we wanted only those closest to us there.

UUUUGHHHHHHHHH! I knew this stress-free wedding planning was going to go down hill at some point.

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As my dad would say, may this be the worst of your troubles. It's totally okay to skip. And as for the strangers, why do you have to invite the whole posse?

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Well... looooooong story, but here goes. Short answer is b/c now they all know and assumed they were invited.

FH is friends with ONE guy from college who is in the wedding party. These other guys, including the one who is getting married, are all friends of this one GM. They are NOT FH's circle of friends (according to FH) and all live OOT but maybe 1. FH sees them all once a year or every two years when his GM organizes some sort of skiing trip or something... FH had a very different circle of friends, save for the GM, who connects FH to these other guys.

So, when the GM got the save the date, he asked all these other guys if they had gotten it and if they were making hotel reservations yet. We didn't find this out until TODAY... so I think FH told them that we ran out, ordered more, and they should be here soon... but they're all definitely invited. (I know, seriously, they're freakin' men what do they care about save the date magnets?! We're just trying to do the right thing here)

So that's how they all got invited... which is fine, it's okay to have more people... I'm just at a loss for how to handle it any how many to expect... and what to do about this stupid wedding that is 5-6 hours away the week before our wedding.

Re: would you go to an OOT wedding the weekend before your wedding?

I did.
My cousin's wedding was the week before mine, and it was in Illinois. I wanted to go b/c we're close and I was sure she wouldn't be able to attend our wedding as she would have been on her honeymoon.

Her parents (my aunt & uncle) live in Arizona, along with 3 other cousins. All of them (except 1 cousin) came to NY the next week for my wedding!

One of the BIGGEST reasons I was able to go was the wedding was on a Satuday, I left Fri night and returned Sun am. I was completely up to date on all my wedding stuff and was able to 'afford' time away to share in her day.

Re: would you go to an OOT wedding the weekend before your wedding?

If it were family, no question we'd be there.

Re: would you go to an OOT wedding the weekend before your wedding?

UPDATE: FH Saves the Day!

FH was talking to the groom who is getting married the weekend before us and the groom said, 'I'm sorry we'll have to miss each other's weddings'

He assumed that we wouldn't be able to make it because it was the week before - and totally understood. Whew. I feel better.

Re: would you go to an OOT wedding the weekend before your wedding?

Okay... I actually have a story here...

I stayed in LA a week longer because my FH's friend (an ex) was getting married. I rearranged my travel plans, delayed things, etc. Also, I was more than willing because they said they were coming to ours, which they are now not because of $$ problems. I understand that but...

They had an outside wedding with no shade, no SPF. We were outside for 3 hours. I got burned and peeled on my face (that is with wearing my own SPF).

We got seated at a table with a lot of her older friends so they had all heard her side of the break up (believe me there was another side there). We were kind of like the pariahs of the table. Everyone was looking at my FH crosseyed when they realized who he was.

Long story short... Do what is right for you. Don't go to the wedding if you don't want to... Stay home with the girls and get stuff done. Let FH go if he feels inclined.

If you do go, realize that anything that is not perfect there... you will think to yourself, I wish I was home making favors, etc.

A good reason to go is to get last minute ideas... Like using other family member's wedding pictures for the cocktail hour centerpieces.

Re: would you go to an OOT wedding the weekend before your wedding?

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Posted by Kara and Todd

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Indeed. I hereby pronounce you 'not crazy'. I love a party as much as anyone, but if you're not close to these folks, sounds like a stretch to get there. Don't go, and don't sweat it.

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If stealthgroom says it, it must be true!!

I'm soooooooo saving this to pull out when everyone calls me crazy.

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Any of the voices in my head would readily tell you that I'm an expert in crazy.

Meanwhile, glad to hear FH saved the day. As for your new guests, can you just give them their own separate table?

Re: would you go to an OOT wedding the weekend before your wedding?

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Posted by Kara and Todd


Am I wrong? Should we consider going?

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NOPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Re: would you go to an OOT wedding the weekend before your wedding?

I wouldnt go.

Re: would you go to an OOT wedding the weekend before your wedding?

depends on how close we are to the ppl, if very close id do everything i could to make it. esp if they were coming to mine. but otherwise, it would be really tough and stressful and im not sure id go.

Re: would you go to an OOT wedding the weekend before your wedding?

Based upon what you've posted I would def. not go.

Re: would you go to an OOT wedding the weekend before your wedding?

Since it sounds like you're not that close w/him, I wouldn't go. We just found out FH's cousin is getting married two weeks before us and we are probably not going.

Re: would you go to an OOT wedding the weekend before your wedding?

I wouldn't go. It would be super stressful and just not worth it. Stay home and wrap up all the little last minutes stuff -- like packing for your honeymoon!!

Re: would you go to an OOT wedding the weekend before your wedding?

Oh I'm glad it all worked out!