Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

We definitely want to be more financially ready. We want a house before we have a child and we want to travel together first. That said, we want to wait 5 years... Lets see how long that actually lasts though

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

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Posted by ant n tilde

we always say the normal things like we want to travel, be financially ready, be lazy etc.

but to be 100% honest - we just have to see more good kids. dont get me wrong i love children but there are kids around us that are just so bad it makes me sick - and i know no one WANTS bad kids so if my kids turn out like that I will just be so disgusted. . .

but if we spend time with MY nieces and nephews ( ahem. . . ) they are such a joy to be around that we start thinking that maybe one day we will be ready but then BAM! we get hit with some other devil children again.

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I am SO with you. I can't really even deal with bratty kids.... my nieces and nephews are well behaved but still so spoiled... and I'm turning into my parents with the 'when I was your age we didn't have the internet!' type speeches.

when i stop seeing screaming kids in restaurants, maybe i'll be ready.

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

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Posted by snwb08

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Posted by ant n tilde

we always say the normal things like we want to travel, be financially ready, be lazy etc.

but to be 100% honest - we just have to see more good kids. dont get me wrong i love children but there are kids around us that are just so bad it makes me sick - and i know no one WANTS bad kids so if my kids turn out like that I will just be so disgusted. . .

but if we spend time with MY nieces and nephews ( ahem. . . ) they are such a joy to be around that we start thinking that maybe one day we will be ready but then BAM! we get hit with some other devil children again.

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I am SO with you. I can't really even deal with bratty kids.... my nieces and nephews are well behaved but still so spoiled... and I'm turning into my parents with the 'when I was your age we didn't have the internet!' type speeches.

when i stop seeing screaming kids in restaurants, maybe i'll be ready.

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LOL...I turn to the 'when I was their age I never ran in someone's house, never touched things that weren't mine...was never misbehaved' but its the truth

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

I think we want to enjoy being married. Were young and none of our friends have kids yet so I think the lifestyle change and knowing that we have plenty of time is making us say lets hold off a cple years. Financially we could afford to have a child. I would like to stay home with the baby so I think the idea of losing my salary is daunting but for now its more of were young lets wait a while.

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

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Posted by ant n tilde

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Posted by Espo22

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Posted by ant n tilde

we always say the normal things like we want to travel, be financially ready, be lazy etc.

but to be 100% honest - we just have to see more good kids. dont get me wrong i love children but there are kids around us that are just so bad it makes me sick - and i know no one WANTS bad kids so if my kids turn out like that I will just be so disgusted. . .

but if we spend time with MY nieces and nephews ( ahem. . . ) they are such a joy to be around that we start thinking that maybe one day we will be ready but then BAM! we get hit with some other devil children again.

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i dont mind bad kids dh thinks I am nuts. Not bad in an evil OMG this kid is crazy type of way. But some kids are sassy and a bit more hyper and that part I do not mind. Those kids have alot of personality I don't know why but those feisty kids crack me up. Again DH thinks I have serious issues. Actually now thinking about the description I gave, feisty, sassy and hyper is a great description of DH so i guess it is what i like, funny that DH hates all that but doesnt see thats how he is

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LOL you are nuts

don't get me wrong. . . i know kids cant be perfect but I feel like. . .you can be bad and still be age appropriate and pushing your parents' limits and trying to see what you are going to get away with. that is fine. what really makes me INSANE is when what they are doing is NOT age appropriate like a 5 year old telling her mother to get a life or a 10 year old fighting to wear some hoochie outfit. I LOSE my mind in those instances!!


ETA: or like throwing a tantrum in a restaurant, not being able to take a child out in public - that to me is unacceptable. Now I am NOT talking about babies or toddlers - I am talking about a six year old throwing a tantrum bc they dont serve french fries.

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OMG tantrums...I PRAY that I don't have a tantrum-throwing child. I feel for parents when I see kids doing this. I notice that MOST of the times, not ALL of the times, the parents respond by yelling....I think it encourages the behavior quite frankly. I'm not in their shoes and cannot imagine the frustration though.....hopefully I won't have to find out! lol

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

When I hear, 'Honey, I'm ready' lol

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

1. Buying a house/condo
2. Being in our own place and really experiencing it being just 'us'
3.Going to Europe at least one more time-preferably twice- Greek Islands & Tour of Italy

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

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Posted by jtgarsik

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Posted by Autumn08

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Posted by jtgarsik

honestly - i dont think u're ever 'ready' whether we think we are or not! nothing can really prepare u for a child..except - well..having one! lol. i really just want to wait because i'm enjoying time with my hubby

i DO think being financially stable is a good thing...because we all know that having a baby is $$$$. so in a perfect world - yes. i'd like to be set financially. however life throws u curveballs...so if i got preggo tomorrow i wouldn't let money rob my joy! also in a few years, if we're still not 100% set financially, i wouldn't let that be a factor of NOT having a baby. because who knows - we could be waiting forever lol.

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Agreed.

For me I tried to be more specific. Like these are my goals I'd like to accomplish first before I plan for a baby, or things I want to enjoy more of first.

But I could get preggo tomorrow and I think we'd be just fine.

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exactly...i think when it happens u make things work no matter what.. but of course i'd like things to be easier which is why i'd LIKE to have our finances in order! these days it seems so hard sometimes BUT - when the time comes, i'm sure everything will work itself out

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Of course-we would be ecstatic if it happened but if it's something that we are able to plan-it's ok to have an ideal situation.

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

1-we need insurance

2- we need steady jobs...


other then that we are def. ready

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

I think it might be if we were RICH,, not even stable but RICH. I don't want to worry about money at all. My mom was a single mom and I feel like it really effected my views on having children. Even though she did a good job of keeping us fed and clothed.
I am totally scared that for some reason I will have a baby and not be able to provide for it.

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

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Posted by Kimbalina

I think it might be if we were RICH,, not even stable but RICH. I don't want to worry about money at all. My mom was a single mom and I feel like it really effected my views on having children. Even though she did a good job of keeping us fed and clothed.
I am totally scared that for some reason I will have a baby and not be able to provide for it.

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I feel the same way. My mom wasnt a single mom but my parents werent financially stable when they had me (and my siblings) they survived and we were clothed and fed and very happy but it was tough...and I just dont want to be in that situation

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

I feel emotionally ready and mature and unselfish enough for a baby. I think financially we can make it work but it would be tight. I would think just having some 'emergency fund' money would make us ready

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

What will make me ready?

I keep wondering that very question. I think children are so adorable and I really want to have them one day, but I really enjoy my freedom as well. I like to be able to go out on a whim with DH; I like going to the gym right after work and then lounging around. I figure I am young, so I will enjoy it for a couple more years and then reevaluate.

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

I don't think you are ever 'ready'-we can all be a little more financially secure, travel more, be less selfish, etc. I think for us, we became ready when we started to realize how short life is and how much we want a family of our own!

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

Sometimes when I see my friends who have children, I get a little bit jealous. I'm not sure if jealous is the right word but I do wish I had a family of my own. As I've said, I'm not ready yet... but I think we will be soon.

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

I'm a believer in there never is a 'right time'. My parents raised me with very little and I'm pretty awesome! lmaoo. j/k Honestly, I believe that we are given what we need when we need it most. DH and I aren't 'wealthy' and barely at 'comfortable' but we feel we are ready to take on the responsibilities of having a kid and raising them to be a good person.

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

Well...I can tell you what we did haha

Dh and I waited a year and a half. We didnt have much debt but the little bit we had we paid it off. We have a good amount for a down payment for a home sitting in the bank. So financially we are good. Health wise..we both in good health. We dont own a home yet, but that is because of the crazy market and we dont want to lose out on money.


I did not finish school yet, but that was never my plan. My plan was to go to school while taking care of my children, and then when they go to school, I will venture out and find my career fresh out of college, but as for now my babies will come first. My mother was always there for us and did not work until we got older and I really loved that and I want to do the same.

I will be taking online classes while pregnant and when the baby is born I will be attending a local suny school part time for my bach slowly but surely I will finish and with out any student loan debt ( :


I am soooo sick right now..If I did finish college and have my career I honestly do not think I would be able to work like this, I would probably would have to leave. I am not working right now and Im blessed, because the morning sickness and exhaustion really took over. I am constantly throwing up and I cant go anywhere with out a plastic bag lol

Ive decided to start my family young because I want to be full of energy and I would rather sit on my butt and relax later on then right now, if thats ever the case. I love to keep busy!



Oh and as far as traveling goes...we have seen a good amount and now we are excited to be able to travel with our own children and show them the world!

Re: Spin off: Having the itch.... what will make you 'ready?'

I don't know if I will ever be ready. One of my strongest memories from junior high is when I was hanging out with my best friend and she was saying how much she wants to be married and have children and I said that i wanted to be married but not have children...well I'm a little older now but it's weird I still kind of feel the same way...sometimes I want kids and sometimes I don't, and my 'clock' is definitely running out of time...I like my time and my freedom and I think to be ready you need to be OK with accepting that everything changes when you become a parent. It's all about the baby....so I guess what I'm trying to say is that if it happens I will embrace it (the experience and the baby lol) and my baby would receive lots of love of course and all that, but I am not actually doing anything to 'make' it happen.