FILs are giving my parents money...+ or -??

So...we were told that FILs would not contribute anything to the lavish wedding that we are having. FILs have money, they are just selfish. Fortunately, my parents are able to pay for it. Today, FMIL said to FI that they were going to send a check to my parents to put toward something. This was mind blowing given that FFIL said that he would divorce FMIL if she gave us anything.

We don't know how much the check will be for. FI thinks at most it will be $1,000 (which literally covers their plates and FSIL). I don't think my parents will accept their money given that the wedding is costing over 100 times that. It is kind of silly for them to take it. My parents will probably just say that they should give it to us to put it toward a honeymoon.

Ideally, FILs could just pay for something (ie., band, photo). But the cheapest thing we have is the video which is $3400. That way we could say that the 'X' was from them. They stated that was more than they wanted to give. I feel like it is weird to put the money toward something.

I don't even know what my question is. I guess after all of these months of thinking that they were not going to give anything, I don't know how to feel about it. I guess I am worried that they will throw it in our faces or something. Or try to take credit for the wedding. HELP I AM CONFUSED.

Re: FILs are giving my parents money...+ or -??

Tell your parents to suggest to the FIL's to give you that money as a wedding gift instead!

Re: FILs are giving my parents money...+ or -??

FI said that they would be insulted if my parents refused the money.

Re: FILs are giving my parents money...+ or -??

does it matter if they are insulted? let them be, its wrong that they could contribute to their sons happiness and refuse to do so. but I would accept the money because it is less for them to spend so why not. I just think that at this point your parents should do whatever they feel is right and not worry if they insult people or not.

Re: FILs are giving my parents money...+ or -??

its a sticky situation... some people really believe that the brides family is supposed to pay for everything but I mean think about it.... it is their son too
some contribute and some don't
in my case my FIL's are paying for the band and will probably split the shower
they are also giving us a extremely generous gift
my parents werent expecting but it is nice... your right $1000 is nothing compared to what you are probably spending...! it is nicer to take a piece of something like the video

it will all work out... I hope it does... GOOD LUCK

Re: FILs are giving my parents money...+ or -??

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Posted by am470

FILs have money, they are just selfish.

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I personally would not make that assumption, perhaps they view that money is better spent elsewhere then on a 'lavish' wedding. Then again, you know them and I don't - maybe they truly are selfish. I would really be thankful and grateful for anything a friend or family member would contribute, even if it were only $1.

Re: FILs are giving my parents money...+ or -??

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Posted by lilqtny

does it matter if they are insulted?

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i think it matters, they are her FILs