nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

my mom called me crying... she needs to leave my dad, but doesnt know where to go or how she could really pull it off. i have 3 young siblings she has to take care of, plus she takes care of my grandma who is terminally ill......
i felt so bad for her, but didnt know what to say or do....
anyone know of something i could do to help her?

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

geez i don't think there is anything you can do besides be there for her...

so sorry to hear that

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

how long has ur mom been married and can it be because they might have personal problems that have gotten out of hand?
I am not an expert here but I was married before to the king of all A** H***s
but we had one huge problem he is very abisive and loves money thank god he married a Doc. But that is besides the point I am here if you want to chat...

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

i told her to take the kids and come here tonight, but she said she cant...
my dad wont let her take them to my house, since he doesnt like FH...
and if he did find out she did, it would just cause more problems with them.........

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

sorry to hear about that!

Do you think she is really serious, or maybe they just got into a fight, and she is in the moment of passion?

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

So sorry to hear that.... Just need to be there for your mom and your 3 siblings as best you can.... Unfortunatly divorce is never an easy thing... especially when kids are concerned...

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

sorry to hear about this tough situation. I don't think she should take the kids and leave though . . . she can cause some legal issues for herself . . .

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

junie.... well its hard..... theyve been married for like 11 years now , but together for like 22... with a few break ups....
she doesnt feel like she can trust him.. he doesnt tell her everything, hes a real jerk. he smokes pot like everyday and my mom begged him to stop and he wont... he hides it...
then yesterday or a few days ago my mom and 2 of the kids were at a family members house..... my dad (step) and other sister (shes 11) met them there later..... he smoked with my lil sister in the house and then DROVE her to the party!!!!! i think that was the last straw for her.

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

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Posted by BriBri529

sorry to hear about this tough situation. I don't think she should take the kids and leave though . . . she can cause some legal issues for herself . . .

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she would just leave for the night i guess... and then file for a divorce.


she NEEDS one badly, but i feel bad for her... she works like a dog all week and then takes care of everyone.....
i would feel so bad if she had to do it on her own.. and i know hed screw her over for alamony... (she works off the books)

anyway, then to make me feel even more bad she started crying and was like 'i was going to surprise you and go to your wedding!'
i started to cry... she truly is so selfless and i dont know how or if i can make anything better or easier on her.

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

wow!
I can't believe he smoked with his own child?
Does he want his children to follow his drug habits? Does he not care that his own child is watching and learning?

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

Oh My God how dare he does something like that if I were her I would go to court Tomorrow immediatedly and see if she can get an order of protection, he is a danger for the kids, Family court does not like that at all!!!! if she does leave the house she can can get in trouble and he can charge her with abandoment, and when there are kids involved that is a messy messy thing I honestly believe your mom should go to court tomorrow and file in family court. another issue here is the kids school they can help her alot I've been there done that.

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

you know filing for divorce is just the tip of th iceberg, the step to everything takes a very long time but like I said before if she goes to Fam court they can help her alot

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

may....


well... she doesnt exactly know... my mom said when he got to the party his eyes were glassy.... so she asked my lil sis 'Sami, where was daddy when you guys were home?' and she said 'watching the game, then he went in his office and then locked himself in the bedroom'

great father....

not to mention, when i was like 8 or something i was snooping in their room (my mom was away for a week ) and in his draw i found a few joints.

my mom thought he stopped and then has caught him a bunch of times in the past few months/year

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

Just because he smokes does not make him horrible, however, doing it around his kids is really disturbing.

It seems like he really might have a problem, that he really needs help with. With pot, people get addicted to it, but don't admit that they have a problem. And here, clearly it seems he does, and he needs helping getting over it. Perhaps, if he feels like he might loose your mom, and his kids, he may sober up. It might be the right thing to do to leave...

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

So sorry to hear your news. Just be there for your mom and your siblings. It's all you can do at the moment.

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

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Posted by May05Bride



Just because he smokes does not make him horrible, however, doing it around his kids is really disturbing.

It seems like he really might have a problem, that he really needs help with. With pot, people get addicted to it, but don't admit that they have a problem. And here, clearly it seems he does, and he needs helping getting over it. Perhaps, if he feels like he might loose your mom, and his kids, he may sober up. It might be the right thing to do to leave...

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he told her he wont stop.
nice guy right

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

Your mom can have him removed from the house if a cop comes and finds the pot in his possession. He will get locked up for the night and if he can't make bail they will hold him. She can then file for an order of protection and he will have to find someplace else to live. There is also the child endangerment thing here, but she has to be careful, she could be charged too because she knew of the contraband. She may need a lawyer. Either way, once he is out of the house, she may feel better filing for divorce. Good luck...sending hugs...

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

I sent you FM

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

As a family law attorney, the best advice I can give you is tell your mom to see a lawyer before she does anything. If she's serious, or even semi-serious, talking to a lawyer can provide her with the information and advice she needs to do right by her and the kids. Good luck - FM me if you need additional information.

Re: nwr: Got some unsettling news tonight

Sorry to hear that :(