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Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party?
Rina Posted: Dec 16, 2004 11:36 PM+
Rina MEMBER SINCE: 8/04 TOTAL POSTS : 760 WEDDING DATE: Jan 01, 2015
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Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party?

Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party? I have a huge family on my mother's & father's side. I have a a lot of first cousins on my father's side in Italy. Recently, I was thinking to ask two of them to be in my bridal party. Do you think this is could be achieved? I really want them to be part of my wedding, but think that it could be difficult. What are your thoughts? Have any of you asked out of the country (or state) to be a bridesmaid in your wedding? How did you arrange things? TIA.
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janwinterbridejoy Posted: Dec 17, 2004 12:03 AM+
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Re: Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party?

i think that if you really want then then you should have them. do they travel here often so they they can at least try there dress on an then you can send it to italy so they can have it taken in if needed?
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Rina Posted: Dec 17, 2004 12:20 AM+
Rina MEMBER SINCE: 8/04 TOTAL POSTS : 760 WEDDING DATE: Jan 01, 2015
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Re: Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party?


Posted by janwinterbridejoy

i think that if you really want then then you should have them. do they travel here often so they they can at least try there dress on an then you can send it to italy so they can have it taken in if needed?



Nope, that's the problem. It would be difficult for them to travel back and forth.
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mrswask Posted: Dec 17, 2004 01:30 AM+
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Posted: Dec 17, 2004 01:30 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party?

One thing I was thinking of in reading your post is are they going to be able to participate in wedding related things before your wedding and how is that going to affect you and the rest of your BP? For example - I don't know how many Bm you're planning on having - but if you have three cousins in Italy be BM and two friends from here - is it going to be the 2 friends here who have to plan and do and pay for everything if your relatives cannot travel back and forth..
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chicagogal Posted: Dec 17, 2004 09:07 AM+
chicagogal MEMBER SINCE: 8/03 TOTAL POSTS : 550 WEDDING DATE: Nov 26, 2004
Posted: Dec 17, 2004 09:07 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party?

I didn't ask any family memeber in Italy to be in my bridal party and only 2 could come to the wedding anyway. My friend had her two cousins in her BP and she mailed the dress to her and for the male cousin, it was easy because all he needed was to get measured for the suit.
As fo my BMs I had them all order dresses from the same store and then mailed them to them.
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PUPADOLCE Posted: Dec 17, 2004 09:15 AM+
PUPADOLCE MEMBER SINCE: 3/04 TOTAL POSTS : 645 WEDDING DATE: Aug 27, 2005
Posted: Dec 17, 2004 09:15 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party?

Yes, I am having my first cousin in Italy as my matron of honor. She is like my sister and it is important for me to have her in my wedding. She gave me her measurements over the phone and I'm going to order her dress. She will come to New York about three weeks before my wedding so we have time to do alterations with a local steamstress. I also have cousins from out of state which I'm doing the same thing. They are giving me their measurements and I'm ordering the dresses for them. They are just going to take the dresses and do alterations in their state.

If you really want it , it can be done.
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mms Posted: Dec 17, 2004 09:16 AM+
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Re: Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party?

One of my best friends lives in Spain, and there was no wasy I was going to let the distance dictate that she not be in my wedding! For the dresses, we ordered them from Netbride, so she measured herself and we decided what size would be best for her. When the dress comes in, I'll send it to her in Spain to have altered. I do not expect her to come to my shower or bachelorette party--none of that is important to me. I just know that she should be standing up with me when I get married, and that's what I based the decision on.

The dress thing really is not an issue, I don't think you should let that deter you. I've been in NY weddings when I lived in Chicago, and the dress situation was just as much a pain in the butt.
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littlebookworm4 Posted: Dec 17, 2004 09:27 AM+
littlebookworm4 MEMBER SINCE: 10/03 TOTAL POSTS : 4787 WEDDING DATE: Nov 18, 2005
Posted: Dec 17, 2004 09:27 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party?

That's an awful long haul...I understand you wanting them to be in your wedding but maybe you can do something like have them do a reading or something like that so they are still incorporated into the the wedding?
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CubanBride Posted: Dec 17, 2004 09:33 AM+
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Re: Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party?

No.
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alibali Posted: Dec 17, 2004 10:43 AM+
alibali MEMBER SINCE: 10/04 TOTAL POSTS : 1289 WEDDING DATE: May 22, 2005
Posted: Dec 17, 2004 10:43 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party?

you can ask them to be in your wedding, especially if you're close to them. but would they be able to even attend the wedding if they don't travel a lot?

i know my BM are spread out all over the place -- 2 MOHs in NY, 1 BM in NJ, 1 in PA, and 1 in FL. but the only one who won't be going to everything is the one in FL because the others always travel.

i think it totally depends on you and what you feel is right. why do you want standing up there with you? and does it matter to you if they're not involved in the showers or parties?
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TwoBugs Posted: Dec 17, 2004 10:48 AM+
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Re: Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party?

I had an out of state BM. She didn't come to any parties or my shower, but I certainly didn't care about that. Nor did she come with us when we look at BM dresses - she simply gave me her measurements and I ordered her a dress.

The only thing that mattered was that she is a great friend who was able to stand up with me on my wedding day. All the other things are just extras.
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didianita Posted: Dec 17, 2004 11:01 AM+
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Re: Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party?

I wouldn't recommend it. My MOH moved to Spain and tried to come but couldn't.
My cousin came for the wedding from another country and she walked down the aisle.
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suven Posted: Dec 17, 2004 11:53 AM+
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Posted: Dec 17, 2004 11:53 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party?

NO. It was very difficult with BMs who were out of state. In Italy, they are on the metric system, so converting measurements into inches would be a pain.

And, the fact that international guests may not even end up attending...
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BlondeJD Posted: Dec 17, 2004 12:00 PM+
BlondeJD MEMBER SINCE: 1/04 TOTAL POSTS : 4986 WEDDING DATE: Jan 01, 2003
Posted: Dec 17, 2004 12:00 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party?

I think it depends on what you're expecting from the members of your BP. If you want them to be really involved and are going to be disappointed when they can't be or you can't get a hold of them right away when you need information, then maybe not. Also, how big of a BP are you thinking of having? You need to consider whether having someone out of the country would be a burden on them as well. If you're having a lot of girls, it's easier to have one or two people who are not available because there are more girls to pick up the slack with planning your shower/bach party. If you only have a few girls, it might be a lot for them to handle on their own. But in the end, if these are girls you really want in your BP, geography is just a minor consideration
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Rina Posted: Dec 17, 2004 10:41 PM+
Rina MEMBER SINCE: 8/04 TOTAL POSTS : 760 WEDDING DATE: Jan 01, 2015
Posted: Dec 17, 2004 10:41 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Would you ask family members who are in another country to be in your bridal party?

Honestly whether or not they can help in the whole process doesn't matter to me. I would really like them to be present and have a special part on my wedding day. I have a huge bridal party- 11 gals. I think I may ask them and then they can decide whether they think it may be too difficult to do. Thanks for your help ladies.
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