Don't want to invite my former boss!

My former boss sort of invited herself to our wedding. I didn't mind at the time becauseI thought she was cool and I figured she would give us a nice present. (yes, wrong reason to invite someone, but whatever).

So now she is not my boss anymore, although she acts like she still is. Eventually I will not be doing work for her anymore.

Since she has been promoted, she's been to "busy" to talk to me. She hasn't given me my review yet (which she was suppsed to do in December. And now she is mad because I messed up one of her car service arrangements. (totally my fault, but what ya gonna do, I can't turn back time). I feel as if we don't have that connection we used to have. She doesn't ask me how I am doing or anything anymore. It's as if as soon as she knew she was getting promoted, she abandoned the team. BTW-I have heard my colleagues stating similar things too, so I know it's not just me.

Anyway, I don't want to invite her to my wedding anymore. What should I do, just not send her invite? Should I let her know beforehand that she isn't getting one? Should I invite her anyway? I don't know what to do.

Message edited 1/25/2005 12:57:44 PM.

Re: Don't want to invite my former boss!

hmmmmmmmmmmm....that is a tough one!!!

Re: Don't want to invite my former boss!

I didn't invite anyone that I work with.

My thought was this: "If I left this job the day after my wedding would I speak to any of these people again?" The answer was a big fat NO...So that helped me a lot in my decision making...

Note: I've worked with them for two years...But have no conncetion with any of them...So I didn't invite them...(Including my hot/cold direct supervisor...)

Screw it! You don't need that crap!


ETA: When I say: "hot/cold supervisor" I mean that sometimes she's my best friend and other times she's ignoring me...F that crap!

Message edited 1/25/2005 1:03:21 PM.

Re: Don't want to invite my former boss!

I am personally inviting everyone that I appreciate and that I want to see on my special day. I don't want to see anyone that brings any thoughts to mind other than the ones I want to manifest on my day. Therefore, if you are not close to this person anymore, you should not feel obligated to invite them. You said you do not work with this person anymore, I would invite them if you have kept somewhat close, otherwise, I wouldn't.
As far as letting her know, I wouldn't let her know in advance either. I think it will create more animosity from her towards you. If she approaches you and asks you after you send your invitations after you had sent yours out, I will let her know that you had every desire and intention to invite her but unfortunately you are unable to because there were family guests that need to be invited that you didn't account for.

Re: Don't want to invite my former boss!

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Posted by BMD'sPeanut

My thought was this: "If I left this job the day after my wedding would I speak to any of these people again?" The answer was a big fat NO...So that helped me a lot in my decision making...

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Re: Don't want to invite my former boss!

just don't send her one. it sounds like she treats you like ca-ca. She should not share in the day! I bet she will not even be surprised not to get one given her big fat promotion.

Re: Don't want to invite my former boss!

don't send the invite. inviting coworkers SUCKS. When they don't respond, it becomes a nightmare, especially if the person is 'above you' on the hierarchy.

I had a couple people who I told early on that they would be invited. One of them in particular was my friend, but she used to date one of DH's cousins. She really only wanted to come to my wedding to show off her new man to DH's cousin. ( I didn't need that drama, so not invite for her!)
Another groups of friends that DH and I have, but they are very flakey. For other parties, we'd invite them, they'd say they were coming, they didn't show up. So, we scratched them off the invite list. And, they DIDN"T EVEN CARE! LOL!

So, I say...no invite for the former boss. If she questions you, just say that you are really sad about it, but because of finances, you had to trim the list. Often, I blamed my parents (even though DH and I paid for our wedding), I would just say, "my parents couldn't handle the whole guest list so THEY made a lot of cuts". Then I'd laugh and say, "yeah, of course they made the cuts to MY friends"

Re: Don't want to invite my former boss!

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Posted by Bunnymonkey

it sounds like she treats you like ca-ca.

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Re: Don't want to invite my former boss!

I just wouldn't send her one. There is no reason to explain yourself or your reasoning behind it.

Re: Don't want to invite my former boss!

I just would not send her an invite. If she confronts about it then you can tell her how you been feeling.

Re: Don't want to invite my former boss!

Thanks ladies. I am just not sending her an invite. Maybe that will give room for me to invite an LIW bride.

Re: Don't want to invite my former boss!

I would if you come under your min,

Re: Don't want to invite my former boss!

You never invited her in the first place..she invited herself. Just don't send an invite.