signing my annulment papers tomorrow

Our appt was for Monday but was cancelled b/c of the snow so its tomorrow. I am upset- reality is hitting me that my short marriage will be over- actually it will have never existed. Although I KNOW in my heart I made the right decision, it still hurts so much and I wish it didnt have to be this way.

My husband admitted to me that he has not gotten help since he left. No counselor, no therapy.. all lies.... And he is still drinking and god knows what else. Its so sad. I really loved him with all of my heart and part of me feels like a failure. But i cant force him to change. I cant force him to go the therapy, AA or any other counselor. All I know is that I cant live my life that way. Its not fair. its so cliche but we only get one shot at this life and I cant live HOPING he one will wake up. His wife leaving him was not enough. I only wish he would realize that I loved him so much and I am not doing this to hurt him. I had a hard childhood of divorce and dysfunction and i will be dam&ed if I am going to follow in those footsteps.

Anyway, just venting. I am so scared about tomorrow. My cousin is coming with me because I need a witness with me to signthe papers. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers.

I honestly can tell you this is one of the hardest things I have ever had to go through. Even only being married for a year, I am not leaving because I dont love him anymore, I love him because he has a serious drinking problem and will not do anything about it. And I cant sit there and watch him destry himself and take me down with him.

Wish me luck.. I will need all the strength I can to get me through this...

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

we love you and you have our support on here Im sure.

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

I'll be thinking about you tomorrow. You know you're doing the right thing, and you have all of our support.

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

You seem to know in your heart that you're making the right decision Try to be mindful of that when it gets tough. Also, let yourself mourn this. it is a loss. Don't feel bad being sad or angry ot hurt or confused. You have to go through all of it before you come out the other side. You're a very strong person, and you have a lot of support, so just do the best you can to move forward.

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

Hugs to you. I know that your decision is hard one you made but unfortunately he has to want to change and If he doesn't than you need to find your happiness with someone else. Good luck.

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

you are definitely in our thoughts sweetie!!!

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

This is a very difficult decision, but as long as you're confident it's the right decision than you will be ok. It's good that your cousin is going to support you, because it will be very emotional.
It's obvious how much you love your 'husband' but you are 100% right. You cannot allow him to bring you down such a destructive path. I'm so sorry that even after everything, he still lied to you about seeking therapy.
You're in our thoughts and we're all here to support you!

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

I hope you feel that a weight is off your shoulders tomorrow. Good luck. And you obviously did make the right choice, since he's still lying to you.

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

You're in my thoughts!

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

WE SUPPORT YOU

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

We love you and we support you. When you need us, we will be here

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

Kristi,

Everything that you have written is completely valid, you have EVERY right to feel like that! You are not wrong at all! By admitting to you that he has done NOTHING to help himself he gave you a glance as to what your future would have been if you had stayed. You have made, as sad as it may be for you to say, the best choice for you and your future. Stay strong through this one last thing!!!

We are here to support you!

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

for this difficult time.

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

Kristi,

I have been praying for you all along...you ARE a strong person, you don't need strength-you've had it all along. You are doing the right thing, absolutely 100%. I've done what you've done, I wasn't married though.

You build your support system around you, that is what will get you through it. You've come this far, and it's just a short hop until you can truly start your recovery from this. It will take time, effort, strength, love, and alot of self help. Make yourself #1 and do things you need and want to do for yourself.

We all love you here and if you EVER need anything, please ask me! I want to be here as your friend!!

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

I will pray for you to get through tomorrow with as little stress as possible. I hope this helps you to find peace. You deserve it. I don't know you, but you sound like a warm and caring individual.

Hang in there!

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

have strength that you are doing the right thing. we are here for you

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

You have a big support team here.
I wish you the best...

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

Oh!! Please know you have all my hugs, my love , my prayers with you tomorrow!!! I am so sorry that you are going through this but so proud of you for knowing that you deserve better. You gave it a shot, you loved him and you took the time to know that this isnt for you and that takes guts!! So please be proud of yourself...you are much stronger than you think. Tomorrow will be hard day, but then it is behind you and you can officially move on!!!! Im thinking of you and here for you..please know that!!!!! All my prayers are going to you tomorrow!

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

be strong and know that you have friends here always...whatever you need, let us know and we'll be there!!

Re: signing my annulment papers tomorrow

You are in my prayers