What would you do? wedding and LIFE related- LONG

HI ladies.

I am asking for your advice/opinions on something. Basically since we started wedding planning and figuring out where we are going to live and the whole rent/buy issue, FH has been very concerned about $$.

He makes a pretty decent living as an accountant. I make out OK, but I work for the Federal Government, so you know I am not breaking any banks. I know I could be making more in the private sector, but I really love my job and the people I work with. I know it would alleviate some of the pressure on FH if I went somewhere else and made more money. A friend of his told him that she makes about $20,000 MORE than I do (we have the same title) but in private- and she has her associates (I have a bachelors in Forensic Psych. I am a Legal Assistant in the US Attorney's office, but the work I do is more investigatory...

I am also planning on going back to school for my masters. I don't plan on staying here forever, but I do like working in the Government (security & semi decent benes), but lately I've been feeling like I should bite the bullet and look for something else that pays better, even if I hate it. FH tells me I don't have to, but I don't like the idea that I may not be pulling my own weight here or preventing us from furthering ourselves.

What do you guys think?

Re: What would you do? wedding and LIFE related- LONG

Hey Jess!
I understand that you want to help out and I am sure you are. But if you are happy and FI is telling you to stay where you are, then I would stay! What you can do (and probably already are!) is to try to cut back on some things. People may disagree with me, but I feel that being happy with your job is really important, even more important than making more $$ (I am a social worker... need I say more!). FI and I are in a similar situation. He is about to take a pay cut for a better job in the long run. he'll take about a $12k cut and things will be tight, but we'll manage. I think your happiness is worth more than $$. Hope this helps!

Re: What would you do? wedding and LIFE related- LONG

What will make you happier? Leaving a place you love to work at w/ people you love for a salary bump? Or, making more money possibly at a job you don't like with people you don't like?

Re: What would you do? wedding and LIFE related- LONG

I'm sure there are plenty of other girls (myself included) that understand completely where you are coming from...I'm in school finishing up my degree to become a teacher...the thing is I'm not sure if I want that anymore...I know that if I can get into the public school system...that I'll make decent money, have a great pension...etc...

But right now I'm enjoying my current position - I'm an office manager for an accounting firm...I'm making good money (theres always room to be making better) but its me that has to get up every morning and look forward to coming to work.

I believe that you have to enjoy doing what you do...otherwise why bother...if you're good at it and you enjoy the people and most importantly what you do...stay...in the end the money means nothing if get up everyday and dread going to work....

Re: What would you do? wedding and LIFE related- LONG

I wouldn't necessarily leave the job you love for another job only because it pays more $$.
I would look around for a job that is similar to yours, since you like what you do and see what's out there. Don't rush into anything just because of the $$ factor. And if you find a similar job the work environment may be completely different.... but it doesn't hurt to look around...

Re: What would you do? wedding and LIFE related- LONG

If there has been one thing I have learned - its that it is more important to be happy than to make more money. The money is not worth it if you are miserable every day.
If you think you can find a job where you will be happy than go for it, but otherwise, I would stay where you are. Is there room for advancement at your job? Is there anyway you could ask for a raise?

Re: What would you do? wedding and LIFE related- LONG

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Posted by LaurenluvsTJ

If there has been one thing I have learned - its that it is more important to be happy than to make more money. The money is not worth it if you are miserable every day.
If you think you can find a job where you will be happy than go for it, but otherwise, I would stay where you are. Is there room for advancement at your job? Is there anyway you could ask for a raise?

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I completely agree. I'm sure you feel guilty constantly b/c I know Ricky (FI) feels like ish b/c he makes a 1/3 of what I make. He feels as if he's not pulling his weight when it comes to income, but he's so happy doing what he's doing.

Jess - you're still young! You have plenty of time to excel in your career. Do not compare yourself to others salaries - half the time people lie about what they're making - I SWEAR! You're happy doing what you're doing, and it shouldn't be a reflection on pulling weight. I'm sure the FI loves you as happy poor girl (j/k) instead of being miserable rich girl!

My mom works for the VA Hospital, and could be making 3 x's more in a private facility. She's been a Govt employee for 25 years now and couldn't be happier!

Re: What would you do? wedding and LIFE related- LONG

I think it's better to be happy at a low paying job than to be unhappy at a high paying job. I think you'd have more problems if you were making more money but weren't happy with what you do everyday. Since FI thinks you should stay and you sound like you really want to I think it's best that you stay at your current job. You can get your Master's and bounce back with more $$ later. I'm sure you're pulling your weight but in a different way. We have the opposite, I pay most of the bills but he does a lot of the housework and all the driving when we go out. It adds up! If you really want the extra cash see if you can get a 2nd p/t job or sell Avon, something just to boost your pockets a lil. I'm thinking about doing the same thing honestly, I'd like to be more financially comfortable too. I might have a garage sale or start selling things on ebay just to make something off of the stuff I have laying around. You never know!

Re: What would you do? wedding and LIFE related- LONG

i say maybe to prepare your resume and maybe submit it around and see what comes back.

quality of life is important but who says another job that pays more will be so horrible?
i mean, it cant hurt to see whats out there.you may suprise yourself!

either way, you have a steady job and thats whats important. but it doesnt hurt to look elsewhere- or at least browse and see what the public sector has to offer!
good luck!

Re: What would you do? wedding and LIFE related- LONG

Thanks ladies.

The thing is, right now I am actually saving MORE money than he is- it's just our bottom line. I mean, I just feel bad that if and when a mortgage bank looks at our Adjusted gross income, we'd get more $$ if I made more (obviously) I know how much he wants a house...I don't know. we'll see what happens.

The government itself afford many possibilities, though sometimes it's very difficult. the pay isn't as high, but they have strict qualifications for positions- I do hope to move up the governmental totem pole (my goal is to be in Condi Rice's shoes one day!!) I guess I should just focus on getting my butt back in school!

Re: What would you do? wedding and LIFE related- LONG

I agree with the other ladies. I had a job that paid more a few years ago and I was miserable. I actually took a 20K pay cut just to get out of it. Now, I'm in a job that pays almost as well and I really like it. I have a great boss with great benies. I am also working towards my degree..stay where you are happy and where you can get the most job satisfaction. This will make you happier and healthier in the long run which will make your relationship better overall. You can't put a price on happiness even though money does make things a little easier. You will definitely increase your worth to your employer by getting more educated. This may reap you more $$ rewards.