Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

I am so upset/angry right now!

My FSIL and I do not get along...she has only been on the scene for about 3 years and FH and I have been together almost 6...she and I just don't get along...I try to be civil and I have tried to include her, but she just doesn't reciprocate. (She recently had a baby and I was not invited to the shower. She was invited to my bridal shower and did not attend.)

So....FH's parents included FSIL's parents on our guest list. We had to make cuts and we cut FSIL's parents. I have only met FSIL's parents 3 times and they live in another state so we do not see them at family functions.

FSIL is having a FIT because her parents are not invited....I am standing my ground....this girl does nothing for me, has no interest in my life, and has rejected all my attempts to be friends with her...

Am I wrong here? We had to cut extended family of mine so we could have enough people there....I don't even know her parents!!!! HELP!!!

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

Hi sweetie!

Your FSIL sounds a lot like mine (whom I can barely tolerate). This is YOUR wedding and Mark's no one else's! Stand your grund and do not invite these people. Frankly, I think it's silly to invite the parents of your SIL or BIL, my DH and I did not invite them either and at first my SIL said something like 'oh, we only get 3 seats, my parents aren't invited?' and I said 'no, they are not' and left it at that.

Don't do it...what's the point if you don't get along with her anyway?

Sending you good vibes!

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

I don't really see why they need to be invited at all. It deends on the relationship. Like my BIL's mother, we know her very well we see her for holidays, etc, so she's invited. My FSIL and FBIL? we don't get along with them, don't really ever see FBIL's mom and will not invite her. I know FIL's would probably like us to, but it never occured to us that we should invite them. They're just not close to us

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

I do not think you are wrong at all. It is your day and you have to remember that. If she gets upset at you, that's her problem, she'll get over it. Stand your ground !!!!

good luck

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

I was hysterical crying the other night about this...I just feel like I have gone out of my way for this girl time and time again and she makes NO effort to reciprocate!

I am sick of being the one making the effort and really feel like I shouldn't have to do it on my wedding day!

She didn't even speak to me at her wedding because she was mad that FH proposed to me a week before that (as if I knew when it was going to happen).

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

I am sorry that your going through this, but I blame your FIL's as well.

Your FMIL should of insisted that you be invited to the baby shower and they should of explained to your FSIL that cuts have to be made and her parents are unable to be invited to the wedding.

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

No, I don't think they need to be invited. I'm not inviting any of my FSILs' family.

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

Were your parents invited to her wedding? If not, then there's your answer!

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

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Posted by suven

Were your parents invited to her wedding? If not, then there's your answer!

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No, they were not!

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

I dont think they need to be invited.

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

They do not need to be invited, especially since you've had to cut your own extended family. I have the same problems with my FSIL, and I've just decided to stop trying. There's only so much I can try to give without getting anything back... not even the ordinary civil pleasantries of hello and goodbye when I see her. I've had it, and it sounds like you have too. Stand your ground.

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

I am sorry you are going through this.. I also agree with the other ladies.. this is you and your husband's day...

I don't think you have to invite them!!

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

I agree-if you had to cut extended family than they definitely should NOT be invited!

Its your day and you should invite the people who will join in your day and celebrate the 2 of you!

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

don't even think about it...and a big F HER by the way. she must be mad if she thinks you would continue to be cordial to her with no reciprocation!!!! NO WAY Jamie....stand your ground

sorry, but I have the same issues with my FSIL, and I stopped trying a LONG time ago- she is NOT worth your joy or any tears. just say no, and END the discussion!

what NERVE she has!!!

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

I'd like to call this an OFW sitiation!

OFW = Ohhh....F*ckin.....Well

To bad, so sad, shes a jerk and no you don't have to invite them.

You don't have to do anything!

Sorry if that sounds harsh I'm just done with the whole you have to thing!

You have to have a father daughter dance, you have to invite him/her with a guest, you have to have a garter toss, blah, blah, blah!

I'm familiar with your other posts about this girl and she really treats you guys badly. I'm starting to dislike her and I don't even know her.

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

I agree with everyone else. Her parents do not need to be invited to your wedding. If she doesn't like it, then tough.

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

i agree, F her.

i think you'll feel WORSE after you cut out two of your friends, invite her folks (they don't come, they do come, whatever) and SHE STILL treats you like garbage. ONE MORE HUGE THING you did to please her and she prisses around with her folks on your wedding day and then thinks you did nothing special for her. don't let her walk all over you. you may not like being confrontational and standing up for yourself but you have got to! don't let her walk all over you! and ON YOUR DAY! f her!

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

All 3 of my siblings are married. None of their in laws were invited to my wedding. I actually like most of them, but they simply are not close enough to me to make the cut.

I don't think you should spend another minute thinking about this

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

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Posted by rosaria
Your FMIL should of insisted that you be invited to the baby shower and they should of explained to your FSIL that cuts have to be made and her parents are unable to be invited to the wedding.

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I agree completely.

However, if everyone is getting a certain number of people to invite, and this is who your FIL's want to invite, it's really not for you to say either way.

JMO.

Re: Need Help/Advice! Can't Stand the Drama & Tension!

So...is this your FH brother's wife??? Is this how she is your SIL?

If so, and especially since your parents werent invited to hers........where does she come off acting like a psychotic nut? You did mention she just had a baby........she could be going thru post-partum depression and is making her craziness elevated.

YOu cant have someone ruin your day b/c of crap like this......you really should show an 'I dont care' attitude.......so thsi way she can whine and scream all she wants.....and you will be the one walking on clouds and smiles........