Wedding Forums > Brides Helping Brides ™ > Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
mable
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:10 AM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:10 AM
Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
SO as most of you know I am happily married for a month, I love my husband to death..anyway one of my good friends decided to start dating my ex boyfriend .. there are no feelings here but he is the last guy I was w/ before my husband and she knows things about us.. A LOT!!!!
Now they want to know if I am mad or ok w/ it..
I can't stop it (plus it happened already) I just think it is WEIRD!!!!
WHat do you think, and what do you say to them about it..
tracy2246
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:13 AM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:13 AM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
I would not say anything because the dynamics have changed now-I can see why you would feel weird about it-I understand that no feelings are involved but it is kind of creepy to think that two people who know you that well now date-I would just wish them well and enjoy your new hubby-
mable
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:15 AM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:15 AM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
That was very nicely put.. cool..its creeping me out more then anything,... what if she tells him things i had told her.. him and i are still good friends and he has become good friends w/ my husband..
GsCM4EVA
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:16 AM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:16 AM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
Posted by mable
That was very nicely put.. cool..
its creeping me out more then anything,... what if she tells him things i had told her.. him and i are still good friends and he has become good friends w/ my husband..
IMO that was wrong of her to go out w/him.
Friends should not date other friends ex's....
BEANS
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:17 AM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:17 AM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
It is a little weird. I thinks she should have consulted you first.
ChrissynRicky
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:17 AM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:17 AM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
It's weird, but honestly, someone is going to always be someone's ex...somewhere through time.The world is indeed 'small'....
That being said - you're happily married and I know it's tough to not think about it, but it's in the past, let it stay there.
tracy2246
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:24 AM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:24 AM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
Posted by JeanineHubert
Posted by mable
That was very nicely put.. cool..
its creeping me out more then anything,... what if she tells him things i had told her.. him and i are still good friends and he has become good friends w/ my husband..
Oh it is strange no doubt and I would be freaked out as well. I doubt that anything will come up -it was before you and hubby even dated and if something comes up adresss it then. No one can be mad at things that happened before you and hubby became a couple-
Look at it this way-you guys dated and for one reason or another ended it-and that led you to better things-it is clear that you think highly of him and it is great that you have a close friend who he hit it off with. Finding someone good is so hard as it is-ideally not the perfect situation but maybe they will end up together-
However I would make it clear that you are not interested in being a sounding board for every issue that comes up with them.That would be too odd.
mable
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:25 AM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:25 AM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
Thanks ladies..
Blu-ize
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:36 AM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:36 AM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
I wouldn't worry about it until it develops into more..right now it's just the beginning...they are more concerned with each other than you..let it be.
LaurenluvsTJ
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:41 AM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:41 AM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
It is kind of wierd, but things are different, you are married, so I wouldn't say anything. Be happy for her and thats it.
otherme
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:45 AM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:45 AM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
yup, you're married and therefore you have no say in any of it. So what that she knows 'things'? whats in the past is in the past. you have no cause to feel weird or think that they shouldn't date.i wouldn't say anything or bring anything up about it - let them be.
otherme
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:46 AM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 11:46 AM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
Posted by JeanineHubert
IMO that was wrong of her to go out w/him.
Friends should not date other friends ex's....
you know what? this isn't high school anymore.. she's married now. all bets are off.
mtdr1106
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 12:07 PM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 12:07 PM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
Posted by otherme
Posted by JeanineHubert
IMO that was wrong of her to go out w/him.
Friends should not date other friends ex's....
you know what? this isn't high school anymore.. she's married now. all bets are off.
yes - its true that she is married and loves her husband and it changes the situation - but everyone is entitled to have feelings on the situation.
and especially since kristen asked for opinions - there is no reason to be condescending and compare her feeling to high school.
mable
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 12:12 PM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 12:12 PM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
Thank you..i wanted to see how everyone else would handle it.. especially those who are not married yet..
I am not jealous or anything like that but, she is a good friend of mine and I just think its gross.. nothing like HS.. becaus if it was I would be having a hissy fit and or a screaming match w/ them
JXNOscar
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 12:13 PM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 12:13 PM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
I think it is weird too, but you cant say anything. Thats what we are hear for. Another persons trash is another persons treasure?
otherme
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 12:14 PM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 12:14 PM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
Posted by mtdr1106
Posted by otherme
Posted by JeanineHubert
IMO that was wrong of her to go out w/him.
Friends should not date other friends ex's....
you know what? this isn't high school anymore.. she's married now. all bets are off.
yes - its true that she is married and loves her husband and it changes the situation - but everyone is entitled to have feelings on the situation.
and especially since kristen asked for opinions - there is no reason to be condescending and compare her feeling to high school.
OMG sorry, totally didnt mean to offend anyone - really.
must be the day i'm having (tone of my response)
sorry girls
mtdr1106
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 12:16 PM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 12:16 PM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
Posted by otherme
Posted by mtdr1106
Posted by otherme
Posted by JeanineHubert
IMO that was wrong of her to go out w/him.
Friends should not date other friends ex's....
you know what? this isn't high school anymore.. she's married now. all bets are off.
yes - its true that she is married and loves her husband and it changes the situation - but everyone is entitled to have feelings on the situation.
and especially since kristen asked for opinions - there is no reason to be condescending and compare her feeling to high school.
OMG sorry, totally didnt mean to offend anyone - really.
must be the day i'm having (tone of my response)
sorry girls
mable
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 12:20 PM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 12:20 PM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
no prob.. its the day most of us are having..and that was a great line about the trash and treasure
EmberLynn
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 12:40 PM+
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 12:40 PM
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
Okay yes I agree that dating a friends ex is touchy grounds, BUT in the same respect, if we only get one true love in this life, maybe he is hers. Maybe what he saw in you is was the similarites of her. I don't know, maybe I'm totally wrong here. But I do think it was right that they let you know, and yes it may have happened already, but they might have just tried to figure the right way to tell you. Look break the ice. Tell them how you feel, but realise these are your feelings and your issues. You have the choice to either be happy for them and wish them well or to distant yourself from them. I wish you luck.
69
Posted: Dec 09, 2005 01:54 PM+
Re: Ok since I have been stopping by here I wanted to see future brides opinions.
ummmmmmm I think that I would be super pissed...... some things are just off limits....yes, your married-- however, some things should be left untouched..... just my opinion.....
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