Song/dance with 10 yr old daughter. . . okay??

Okay ladies. . . I need a little help with something. I considered this for a while and then let it go. . .and I just heard the song again and now I'm thinking about it all over again . . . I am a single mom (okay, FH and I live together now. . but if you've ever been a single mom, you know you're still a single mom in most ways) of one beautifully sweet little girl. She's 10 and she's going to be my MOH. Her father has never really been in the picture except for the occasional child support check. . . and we haven't spoken to him in almost 4 years. Now, here's the thing . . . my daughter is my everything (next to FH of course) She was born when I was 20 and I struggled with raising her, working and going back to school (I'll get my bachelor's degree in History and English this month ) Anyway, she was the only good thing in my life for a while. She was my inspiration and my source of strength when I felt I could not go on. . . SO, when I hear In My Daughter's Eyes by Martina McBride it gets me every time. . . because that is how I feel about Abigail. . . and I wonder could I have my band perform that song for her at my wedding? I mean, obviously I could. . . but would it be appropriate or weird in a way? My FH has 3 children as well (with one daughter the same age) Could we both dance with our daughters? Would that make it less special for mine? (they are the best of friends but can be somewhat competitive over FH and I) . . . could we maybe just mention the importance and then invite any father/daughters or mother/daughters to dance as well? I will be dancing with my dad as well.. . . so he wouldn't be dancing . . . What do you think? It's just that this is a very important day for all 6 of us. . . in some ways more so for my daughter (because of the whole dad thing) and I want to make sure she doesn't feel forgotten. . . so. . . any ideas? Would it be too weird if we danced to it? Could we just play it and not dance? I just love the song and the sentiment . . . I don't know

TIA--jennifer

Message edited 5/5/2006 4:44:09 PM.

Re: Song/dance with 10 yr old daughter??

i think it's a great idea...your post made me a little weepy-eyed at first...my daughter was born when i was 20, too and she is the only thing that makes life bearable some times. she is my everything...and i have no shame putting her before FH because there is nothing like the love of a mother for her child. i think it's a great dedication to her as well. i say have the band announce it as being dedicated to HER and inviting all father/daughter and mother/daughter "couples" out to dance. that's what i planned on doing for our combined father/daughter-mother/son dance...the song we have is long, so partially through it i want them to invite fathers&daughters and mothers&sons out.

Re: Song/dance with 10 yr old daughter??

Let me tell you when I first read the subject line of this thread I thought you were going to ask for song suggestions, and In My Daughter's Eyes is what I was going to answer. It's the perfect song!!!!! FH has a daughter from his first marriage and that's what they're dancing to at the reception, it's so beautiful and I'm sure it would mean a lot to your daughter. I think she would feel so honored and special to have that dance all to herself, and then FH and his daughters can join later. Your dad can dance with you to a different song. He'll prob enjoy just watching you dance this song with Abigail, be sure to have lots of tissues on hand!!

Also, lots of hugs for being a single mom!!!!!!

Re: Song/dance with 10 yr old daughter??

That is so sweet that you are doing this.

Since she is 10 she might not want everyone looking at her while the two of you dance. It will be an emotional moment for her and you.

I think it would be nice if you and your FH both started the dance with your daughters and have the DJ state that it is being dedicated from you to her and your FH to his daughter.

Then maybe you either switch and you dance with your step daughter and he dances with your daughter or invite other people up to dance.

Whatever you decide to do, it will be beautiful.

Re: Song/dance with 10 yr old daughter??

I know how you feel, I have a 3 1/2 year old son who will be 4 at the wedding. I think I'm going to have them play "you'll be in my heart" from Tarzan. I'll start out with him and then have everyone join in. I wanted beautiful Boy from Celine Dion but since hes only 4, I dont know if he'll dance slow with me. I practice now and he stays for about 5 seconds and he wants to jump around.
You can dance with your daughter and then have FH dance with his daughter. I dont think it would take away from your daughter at all.

Re: Song/dance with 10 yr old daughter??

I think it's wonderful and I got teary-eyed too, just reading it. I have an 11 YO son who was born when I was 21 and literally saved my life (I won't get into details here). His father passed away a few years ago and really FH and my father have been the only stable male figures in his life. I found the song "He Didn't Have To Be" by Brad Paisley to be very appropriate and am having it dedicated to my son and FH at our wedding.

Re: Song/dance with 10 yr old daughter??

Oh, Thank you so much. . . I knew I could count on all of you. . . My computer messed up for a while and apparently LIweddings wasn't working on it because it said no replies until just now. . . and I was so sad Thank you for all of your support . . . It's nice to know that other mother's feel the same. . .my daughter truly saved my life too. . . she gave me direction and purpose and I wouldn't be the person I am today without having had her Children truly are a blessing. . .

Re: Song/dance with 10 yr old daughter. . . okay??

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Posted by vixchik

i think it's a great idea...your post made me a little weepy-eyed at first...my daughter was born when i was 20, too and she is the only thing that makes life bearable some times. she is my everything...and i have no shame putting her before FH because there is nothing like the love of a mother for her child. i think it's a great dedication to her as well. i say have the band announce it as being dedicated to HER and inviting all father/daughter and mother/daughter "couples" out to dance. that's what i planned on doing for our combined father/daughter-mother/son dance...the song we have is long, so partially through it i want them to invite fathers&daughters and mothers&sons out.

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Re: Song/dance with 10 yr old daughter. . . okay??

I think this is a wonderful idea for the both of you to dance with your daughter's together.....
I love that song too.....

Re: Song/dance with 10 yr old daughter. . . okay??

Thats beautiful!!!

FH is dancing with both his daughters at our wedding too!

Re: Song/dance with 10 yr old daughter. . . okay??

No it would not be weird at all!! I think that would be an amazing thing to do with her!!! I say go for it!! My daughter is my MOH also and she is 12.. I have a 10 year old son also and I want to dance to a song with the both of them!! I think it will make her feel sooo special!!