I FEEL SO OVERWHELMED

I am not getting married until 2003 and have only booked a hall and the church.....but am already second guessing myself. My FH thinks I am crazy, but I am freaking out that everything is going to cost too much and that maybe we should have looked at more places. Am I crazy?

Re: I FEEL SO OVERWHELMED

I know how you feel. I did the smae thing actually and ended up switching places. If you are not sure look at some other places and then go back to the one you booked and see if you still feel the same way. It's better to change your mind now while you still have choices available.

Happy Planning!

Re: I FEEL SO OVERWHELMED

I have second guessed every decision I have made...but I am pretty happy now - at less than 2 months to go!!!

x

x

Re: 2nd and 3rd guessing for me... :-)

I think the most important thing to do is realize that you can only do your best- but that I mean, meet with vendors, read posts, go with your gut feelings. After a decision is made try to move on to the next thing. Don't make second guessing every decision part of your process, or try your best to not.
It is hard because we all get so caught up in the planning, but I realize that I am crazy and that is a good first step towards healing Seriously though sometimes I just remind myself that everything is going to be fine and even if every decision is not perfect it is the best that I can do.

chill out

What month in 2003? You have time dont feel pressured, I am taking my time so I can research and try to get the most for my money, i know I will be happier in the end then. For example i took over a month of searching for a dress and ended up getting it for 210$!! That was worth the extra time put in. What hall did you pick anyway?

Re: I FEEL SO OVERWHELMED (advice - long)

I got some great advice from four friends who were just married when I got engaged. Helps deal with both the overwhelming nature of being a bride and potential family problems.

First, pick five things that are the most important to you about the day and do not negotiate on them. This can be anything from the time of day you are getting married to what type of flowers. This way you know your priorities. If you begin to second guess and it is on your top five you know that you should take the extra time to do more research or continue to look around.

Second, if it is free...give it to them. I had a friend whose mother fought tooth and nail for her to walk down to 'Here Comes the Bride.' The bride was against it. Finally she said 'It is free. It will make her happy, I will do it.' Now, when her mother insisted they upgrade the centerpieces b/c she thought they were too small, the bride told her mom 'Fine, you are paying.' People change their mind when money is involved. :) Keeps peace but let's people know where you stand.

Third, the deacon marrying us gave us this advice which I think is great. He said 'When someone approaches you and says 'You aren't choosing those awful pink flowers are you?' or some other negative comment. Politely say to the person 'Thank you for your opinion, I really appreicate it. The priest marrying us told me something great about weddings and marriage. A marriage is between myself and (your fiance's name) and God. And I do have to tell you God likes the pink flowers.'

It is really a good piece of advice. Politely tells people to back off, while making it a little light with a joking nature.

Make lists and hand out assignments. I am 35 days away and shocked how calm I am (ask me again in 10 days!). Remember, besides the flowers, menus, bridesmaids, etc. the result will be the same: you and your honey will be married.

Chin up and enjoy this exciting time. I am almost depressed mine is coming to a close!

Re: I FEEL SO OVERWHELMED

I felt the same way, I think it is only natural.
This is like one of the biggest and most expensive day of your life. After you make a big decision like hall, then you start to second guess yourself.
Remember there is a reason you booked this place, maybe gut reaction or you just fell in the love. I would not go looking at too many other places you will drive yourself crazy, espesially if you fall in love with one and it is more money then the one you booked (out of your budget).

dont go somewhere you know you cant afford, if there is another place in your budget you want to check out go, but how much did you put down and wha does your contract say.
I bet your place is perfect its just NERVES !!
I second guess ever decsion i have made so far.

But since I am on a budget, there are lots of places I didnt bother looking out cause I knew I couldnt afford it so why but myself thru it, same with trying dresses on, I wont try ones on I cant afford.

Good Luck

Kimberly

Re: I FEEL SO OVERWHELMED ( long response)

I think we all can relate to how you are feeling. I'm sure we all have done out share of second guessing!
And as far as being overwhelmed, well you're in good company!!!
We were engaged in Feb. and our wedding is in Sept. Lots of planning in a short amount of time.
Here is some advise that I actually got from my fiance, It helps keep everything in perspective:

At the end of the day the only thing that matters is that we were married, everything else is 'gravy'.

Will it really matter if the flowers don't arrive in the exact shade of pink that you imagined? You are getting married and thats the whole point!!!

Keep an eye on these boards, It makes things easier. The brides are going though the same things and helping narow the choices down. Ask as many questions as you need, we will help!
Good luck! Hope this helps! HAVE FUN!

Re: I FEEL SO OVERWHELMED

THANKS FOR THE SUPPORT. I was just in one of those moods. It was my first day reading the posts and starting second guess everything. We chose Westbury Manor. I feel a lot better today.

Westbury Manor is Great

My best friend got married there last Feburary and it was wonderful. You made a good choice.
Congrats and good luck

Re: I FEEL SO OVERWHELMED

Friends of ours got married there. It was beautiful. The grounds are unbelievalbe! Good choice.

It is true that what you are going thru is normal. There are always going to be 'what ifs'. As I told my FSIL for her wedding - as long as you are married at the end of the day - you did fine!

Enjoy every minute of the planning - this is going to be the best day of your life!

Westbury Manor

I am second guessing everything too. We are also having our reception at Westbury Manor next year and I loved it when I booked it but then decided I didn't look at enough places. I ended up going back four times to look at it again. At first I thought the room was too dark and I made them turn the lights up and down to test different levels of lighting (what is wrong with me??). The last time I went back they were set up for a party and that was the clincher. Once everything was in place, the room looked great.

Re: Westbury Manor

I am getting married at the WM too in June - 33 days, yipee!
I was just like you - I second guessed EVERYTHING, from my dress to the hall to the month and day we picked to the menu! EVERYTHING! My FH just deals and my maid of honor has been a blessing, whenever I call her and tell her how I feel, she just reassures me that I am doing the right thing and brings me back to why I made my decisions when I did. I always try to think back in that timeframe when I made the decision and what I was thinking back then - most of the time, that works for me!
But, we have 33 days left and being that it is getting so close, I'm happy with my decisions and I just going with the flow for the rest of the 33 days. To late now and I know that no matter what it will be beautiful!
I'll be happy to fill you and other WM brides out there with our details and once the wedding is over, our pictures and comments.
I've gotten help and advice from other WM brides and I intend to do the same!
It also makes me feel good when I hear about weddings there and that other brides on this board have chosen the WM.
It really is gorgeous and we are hoping that the day will be beautiful and everyone will be able to enjoy how really gorgeous the WM is!
Don't worry, you are getting married and this is a wonderful time. NO matter what anyone else thinks!