Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

I've never been to an E Party where people OPENED their GIFTS.. so I was expecting to have to open mine tonight. Esp. since It hink most people end up giving money for an e party right? but anyway, it's a big dinner party at a nice restaurant... and I don't think it's necessary for FH and I to have to sit there and open up all these gifts..... i just don't think the PARTY IS ABOUT GIFTS AT ALL!!!! Everyone will get thank you notes of course!!...... I want to spend the time with family and friends not opening gifts...

My parents agree and are fine with it...

FH and his parents are like INSISTING THAT WE OPEN gifts... because they know that his sister bought us a gift and that they bought a gift.... so they want it opened.. and they think it's rude of us NOT TO! but I don't think it's nice to sit there and open envelopes either.. it's kind of uncomfy ya know???

So now it's a huge disagreement.. 6 hours before the party........ I don't understand why FH and I can't just decide and why we have to feel PRESSURED by his parents to HAVE TO OPEN GIFTS! I am very anoyed right now because they never mentioned this.. and then threw it on me THE DAY OF.... no choice.. just YOU HAVE TO DO IT!! GRRRR

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

Nope. We didn't. I don't think it's appropriate. It's not the shower. We had a gift table and then we took everything home and opened it there. I would have felt VERY uncomfortable opening the gifts in front of everyone...friends, parents, coworkers, etc...

Good luck tonight!

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

i'm so sorry that they're pressuring you! it's your e-party; it's your choice! i don't think it's appropriate to open gifts, especially since bringing a gift to an e-party is not standard across the board. it'd make people who didn't bring a gift feel uncomfortable. also, who wants to open an envelope and say, "thanks for the 200 bucks! that's very kind of you!" in front of 60 people?

GL!!

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

we didn't open gifts. in fact, my FMIL and FSILs thanked me for not forcing all the guests to sit and watch me open presents.

on the other hand, my mom and brother were anxious for me to open their gifts bc they didn't shop off the registry. i took them aside (there was a back room) and opened them privately. just a thought.

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

Can't you just open their gifts with them before or after the party? I think it's kind of odd to open gifts at an e-party, particularly if many people are giving money instead of actual gifts.

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

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Posted by mrsdraskin2009

Nope. We didn't. I don't think it's appropriate. It's not the shower. We had a gift table and then we took everything home and opened it there. I would have felt VERY uncomfortable opening the gifts in front of everyone...friends, parents, coworkers, etc...

Good luck tonight!

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Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

I don't think you'll have to open gifts, i think once his parents are at the party they'll be distracted and won't notice. if they come up to you during the party and ask, then say you'll open those 2 gifts up but then don't have everyone stop what they're doing and stare at you doing it.

if they keep asking in the next few hours, just stay calm and say "we'll see"

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

we didnt open our gifts at the party but since ours was in the daytime we invited FH's mom, brother and sisters to my house and we opened the gifts at my house

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

I'm so sorry you have to deal with this so close to the party.

I've never heard of opening gifts at the eparty. As many people mentioned, a lot of people give cash which is uncomfortable to announce.

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

I have never heard of opening gifts there. I can just imagine opening up cards and saying things like "Oh Fifty Dollars thanks so much!"

I would do what you want!!!

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

At my e-party, FH and I did open our gifts at the end of the night when it was just us and a few guests left. But it was at my home so that makes a big difference. I agree with you... you are going to be at a nice restaurant so enjoy that time with your family and friends. Maybe if you want to invite FHs family back to your house afterwards you could open your gifts there and they can watch.

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

we didnt open gifts, and i agrre most peopel give money so i think its rude to be opening money in front of everyone. Maybe just open FH parents presents at the party

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

No you do not open gifts at an E-Party or any except for showers. Its just not right to let people know how much money another person is giving you. Especially since E's are usually all $$$. We opened all of ours after our party. Its was alot of fun & it was just for me & Joe!

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

we didnt open gifts at ours.....i dont think that its neccessary

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

08er crashing.......we didnt want to open gifts at the party but they older ( and there were alot of them) really wanted us to! we only opened gifts no cards

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We ended up not opening it... and it worked out sooo much better!!!!!!!!!!!! we are glad we ended up sticking to WHAT WE WANTED TO DO and not letting others influence us

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I'm glad you stuck to what made you feel comfortable !! Always remember it is about you two and you two only !!!! How did the e-party go???

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

yeah. i agree. it's your e-party so you should stick to what you want to do.

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Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

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Posted by bumper

yeah. i agree. it's your e-party so you should stick to what you want to do.

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Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

nevermind. i just caught on

Message edited 4/27/2008 7:54:25 AM.

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

We had NO INTENTION of opening our gifts, but a few people insisted at our e-party ....the rest we opened back at home. It was really arkward....but I didn't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable...including us....lol.

Believe it or not...Etiquette book say not to open gifts...because people are not expected to bring a gift to an e-party (Everyone still does...but that's what I researched before my e-party...by opening gifts it could make people who didn't brimg a gift feel bad)

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

We opened one gift, but the only reason was because it was a canvas photo two BM's made us and we hung it up over some ugly eagle thing that was hanging up in the hall to cover it up. I would just ignore the subject and enjoy the night and if they ask during the night be like, we're having so much fun we dont want to stop right now. It's your party do what you want, it's an e-party not a shower you wouldn't open presents at a wedding

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

BUMPER HYSTERIAL!

Message edited 4/27/2008 8:38:30 AM.

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

i agree with you. i didn't think you open them at the party.

Re: Open Gifts at Engagement Party?

Just had this discussion with my dad! FH and I have been recieving eparty gifts directly to the house (I love pulling up at my house and seeing a huge Bed Bath and Beyond box waiting for me by the gate). So we have been opening when we get them and my dad said that we should leave them wrapped and put them on the gift table at the party (its in my backyard) I'm so glad that we won that discussion! We've already designated an area in my basement where all the gifts are going and its starting to pile up already- I also know that my Mom's cousin who was more than generous probably didn't want to showcase or display all that they sent as a gift- Presents are private sometimes I think...