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awkwardness...seeing a no-show no-gift couple
MushesGirl Posted: Aug 31, 2008 07:50 AM+
MushesGirl MEMBER SINCE: 5/07 TOTAL POSTS : 1171 WEDDING DATE: Jun 29, 2007
Posted: Aug 31, 2008 07:50 AM bride-minus.png

awkwardness...seeing a no-show no-gift couple

so I got an evite for dh's cousin's kid's 1yr birthday party, we rsvp'd yes. I look at the list and see another couple we know and had invited to our wedding who couldnt come (they called the hall that day and just said they 'couldnt make it'...dh heard from his cousin that their kid was sick or something). We never got a call from them, nor a gift. Now we're going to see them at this party. How would you approach this? Seems like its going to be awkward...at least to me. dh could care less.
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medic6809 Posted: Aug 31, 2008 09:16 AM+
medic6809 MEMBER SINCE: 5/07 TOTAL POSTS : 1300 WEDDING DATE: Jun 01, 2007
Posted: Aug 31, 2008 09:16 AM bride-minus.png

Re: awkwardness...seeing a no-show no-gift couple

IMHO it was over a year ago.....who cares. Sorry if that's harsh but was them not showing or not sending a gift so traumatic that you STILL think about it? If it was then I would say something if not then just orget about it. By now they more then likely have forgotten what they did or don't care at this point. Just be the bigger person, smile, and say hi then leave it at that. I'm not saying to be best friends with them but be cordial and move on.
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mariaobride Posted: Aug 31, 2008 09:51 AM+
mariaobride MEMBER SINCE: 9/07 TOTAL POSTS : 6581 WEDDING DATE: Jun 06, 2008
Posted: Aug 31, 2008 09:51 AM bride-minus.png

Re: awkwardness...seeing a no-show no-gift couple

By them just seeing you both may make them feel weird without you both even saying anything. They might even bring it up and apologize. I would just brush it off my shoulder and go to the party as if nothing ever happened
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MushesGirl Posted: Aug 31, 2008 10:17 AM+
MushesGirl MEMBER SINCE: 5/07 TOTAL POSTS : 1171 WEDDING DATE: Jun 29, 2007
Posted: Aug 31, 2008 10:17 AM bride-minus.png

Re: awkwardness...seeing a no-show no-gift couple


Posted by medic6809

IMHO it was over a year ago.....who cares. Sorry if that's harsh but was them not showing or not sending a gift so traumatic that you STILL think about it? If it was then I would say something if not then just orget about it. By now they more then likely have forgotten what they did or don't care at this point. Just be the bigger person, smile, and say hi then leave it at that. I'm not saying to be best friends with them but be cordial and move on.



I don't think it was traumatic, I just feel like if I was them i'd be very embarrassed at this point. So maybe I feel embarrassed for them?
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MushesGirl Posted: Aug 31, 2008 10:19 AM+
MushesGirl MEMBER SINCE: 5/07 TOTAL POSTS : 1171 WEDDING DATE: Jun 29, 2007
Posted: Aug 31, 2008 10:19 AM bride-minus.png

Re: awkwardness...seeing a no-show no-gift couple


Posted by mariaobride

By them just seeing you both may make them feel weird without you both even saying anything. They might even bring it up and apologize. I would just brush it off my shoulder and go to the party as if nothing ever happened



You're probably right
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medic6809 Posted: Aug 31, 2008 10:44 AM+
medic6809 MEMBER SINCE: 5/07 TOTAL POSTS : 1300 WEDDING DATE: Jun 01, 2007
Posted: Aug 31, 2008 10:44 AM bride-minus.png

Re: awkwardness...seeing a no-show no-gift couple


Posted by MushesGirl


Posted by medic6809

IMHO it was over a year ago.....who cares. Sorry if that's harsh but was them not showing or not sending a gift so traumatic that you STILL think about it? If it was then I would say something if not then just orget about it. By now they more then likely have forgotten what they did or don't care at this point. Just be the bigger person, smile, and say hi then leave it at that. I'm not saying to be best friends with them but be cordial and move on.



I don't think it was traumatic, I just feel like if I was them i'd be very embarrassed at this point. So maybe I feel embarrassed for them?



I understand what your're saying.....I was trying to say if it was a very close friend or family member and you were VERY offended and p*ssed then I would say something...if it's more of a friend of a friend then let it be......I would also be embarrassed for them but if I learned 1 thing from wedding planning it is that people don't care if they are no show/no gift people. I never knew how rude people could be
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hayleyandsteve Posted: Aug 31, 2008 11:41 AM+
hayleyandsteve MEMBER SINCE: 7/06 TOTAL POSTS : 6737 WEDDING DATE: Jul 14, 2007
Posted: Aug 31, 2008 11:41 AM bride-minus.png

Re: awkwardness...seeing a no-show no-gift couple

honestly... i wouldn't think it would be awkward.

i know that for us... everyone who was really important to us showed up. i don't even remember which people were no shows the day of the wedding.

as for not giving a gift... i don't think it's a big deal.

they probably won't be embarrassed. they might not even think they did anything wrong. but if they are... then that is more of their problem than yours, KWIM?
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Cpt2007 Posted: Aug 31, 2008 12:14 PM+
Cpt2007 MEMBER SINCE: 1/07 TOTAL POSTS : 5145 WEDDING DATE: Dec 08, 2007
Posted: Aug 31, 2008 12:14 PM bride-minus.png

Re: awkwardness...seeing a no-show no-gift couple


Posted by hayleyandsteve

honestly... i wouldn't think it would be awkward.

i know that for us... everyone who was really important to us showed up. i don't even remember which people were no shows the day of the wedding.

as for not giving a gift... i don't think it's a big deal.

they probably won't be embarrassed. they might not even think they did anything wrong. but if they are... then that is more of their problem than yours, KWIM?



agreed.
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nifheim Posted: Aug 31, 2008 01:10 PM+
nifheim MEMBER SINCE: 9/06 TOTAL POSTS : 8199 WEDDING DATE: Mar 16, 2008
Posted: Aug 31, 2008 01:10 PM bride-minus.png

Re: awkwardness...seeing a no-show no-gift couple

ah u will be fine, dh's coworkers did a no show/no gift thing (6 people total) he sees them often. I just get annoyed at DH for mentioning it EVERY TIME he sees them, i have to apologize every time.

Just pretend it never happened.
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PegaLega Posted: Aug 31, 2008 02:21 PM+
PegaLega MEMBER SINCE: 6/05 TOTAL POSTS : 29798 WEDDING DATE: May 25, 2007
Posted: Aug 31, 2008 02:21 PM bride-minus.png

Re: awkwardness...seeing a no-show no-gift couple


Posted by Cpt2007


Posted by hayleyandsteve

honestly... i wouldn't think it would be awkward.

i know that for us... everyone who was really important to us showed up. i don't even remember which people were no shows the day of the wedding.

as for not giving a gift... i don't think it's a big deal.

they probably won't be embarrassed. they might not even think they did anything wrong. but if they are... then that is more of their problem than yours, KWIM?



agreed.



ITA
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JennNicole Posted: Aug 31, 2008 02:44 PM+
JennNicole MEMBER SINCE: 1/08 TOTAL POSTS : 4696 WEDDING DATE: Sep 13, 2007
Posted: Aug 31, 2008 02:44 PM bride-minus.png

Re: awkwardness...seeing a no-show no-gift couple

I think some peps are just rude in general how they handle things. However DO NOT SAY A WORD! That would be just tacky

I think just being cordial to this people w/out going out of your way is a wonderful way to handle it.
I know secretly your like this but it just has to be that. Your secret

Like the girls said they should feel more awkward or embarrassed if anything.However If they are not don't be shocked.

I find most people that are no shows and do not acknowledge your invitation with a response or an apology - phone call etc..they just really don't care - and so I find they are doing me a favor.
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MushesGirl Posted: Aug 31, 2008 04:10 PM+
MushesGirl MEMBER SINCE: 5/07 TOTAL POSTS : 1171 WEDDING DATE: Jun 29, 2007
Posted: Aug 31, 2008 04:10 PM bride-minus.png

Re: awkwardness...seeing a no-show no-gift couple

thanks everyone for the replies....I will definitely not mention it, and just greet them kindly and move on
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sugarkube4 Posted: Sep 01, 2008 01:04 PM+
sugarkube4 MEMBER SINCE: 2/06 TOTAL POSTS : 10395 WEDDING DATE: Apr 29, 2007
Posted: Sep 01, 2008 01:04 PM bride-minus.png

Re: awkwardness...seeing a no-show no-gift couple

At this point, it's water under the bridge.. I would say hello exchange pleasantries and leave it at that.. You are the bigger person.. Good Luck!!
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