Fight with FH - who's right?

I'll try to keep this short. I told FH to tell his family to come to the RH at 10 am for pictures next sunday. He told me that's too early, his family won't make it on time, we'll have to take pictures during the reception (nothing formal just go to their table and take pictures with them). Am I wrong to want to spend the whole time partying at my reception that I planned 2 years planning?! We're already seeing each other before the ceremony so we can get pictures out of the way and greet guests at our CH. I don't want to go around to the tables at the reception, I want to enjoy myself! Who's right because I always think I'm right, it's an illness.

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

It all depends on what time your ceremony is and if it is at the rh..Are you asking that everyone arrive more than an hour early ? How many pics are you looking to get and will it really take that much time from your reception ?

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

i think you're both right actually which makes NO sense. We took family pictures before but only parents and siblings... at our reception DH was like my mom wants us to take a picture with the aunts... fine but if we do it there we have to do all the other aunts. it annoyed me at first but in the end it was really only like 3 tables and took NO time.

so you're both right! [not a poll choice]

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

i would say you are lol but thats just because i felt the same way. we told everyone to be there before the ceremony around 4 for pictures whoever didnt show up which was only about 2-3 families we took one quick picture at the reception but i refused to take formal pictures at the reception because i wanted to dance.

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

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Posted by Kerin2804

It all depends on what time your ceremony is and if it is at the rh..Are you asking that everyone arrive more than an hour early ? How many pics are you looking to get and will it really take that much time from your reception ?

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Ceremony starts at 11:30 but we have a rehearsal at 11 so we can't take pictures after that. FH has a very large family, if it was 1 or 2 people I wouldn't mind but I can imagine the complete and utter chaos trying to get all of them together in the middle of the reception

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

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Posted by snwb08

i think you're both right actually which makes NO sense. We took family pictures before but only parents and siblings... at our reception DH was like my mom wants us to take a picture with the aunts... fine but if we do it there we have to do all the other aunts. it annoyed me at first but in the end it was really only like 3 tables and took NO time.

so you're both right! [not a poll choice]

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I should probably just suck it up, I'm so stubborn thanks for your input.

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

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Posted by jennandrolo

i would say you are lol but thats just because i felt the same way. we told everyone to be there before the ceremony around 4 for pictures whoever didnt show up which was only about 2-3 families we took one quick picture at the reception but i refused to take formal pictures at the reception because i wanted to dance.

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exactly! I keep hearing how quick it goes by, I don't want to be taking pictures. They wouldn't be formal though he kind of just wants to get a picture with the table I don't know why I'm picturing this to be a big problem but I am. I think it's just wedding jitters.

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

I would say both!! Is there way to compromise the time? Maybe 11? What time is your ceremony?

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

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Posted by sweetdoublenn

I would say both!! Is there way to compromise the time? Maybe 11? What time is your ceremony?

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Well the ceremony is at 11:30 and the rehearsal is at 11 so I don't think so.

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

Ooo than it has to be 10. I think they should make at least an effort..if not all can come then some? Would that work?

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

10 isn't early! i say just do it!

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

I think you are both right. We had a similar timeline and told family to come at 10am for pictures. My dad's step-mom didn't get the memo and booked a car service that wouldn't get her there until 11am. We did a quick shot with her before signing the ketubah, and had to get the extended family shot with her done in the bridal suite while we waited for the ceremony to begin.

Try to avoid taking as many pictures as possible during the reception. We did go back outside for a few BP shots we missed and shots of ourselves at the end of dinner, but why should YOU have to miss some of your reception to take pictures so that the extended fam can sleep in an extra 45 minutes?

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

I think that it's really unfair of you to ask his family to arrive early so that you can get photos out of the way so that you can party during your reception. While I understand why you would want to do this it is not very reasonable to expect that everyone will share your sentiments. And honestly if his family is that big I highly doubt they would all get there at 10 anyway so you would still have to take some of those family shots during cocktail hour or Reception. I don't think that you should be upset with FH about this.

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

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Posted by dante31300

I think that it's really unfair of you to ask his family to arrive early so that you can get photos out of the way so that you can party during your reception. While I understand why you would want to do this it is not very reasonable to expect that everyone will share your sentiments. And honestly if his family is that big I highly doubt they would all get there at 10 anyway so you would still have to take some of those family shots during cocktail hour or Reception. I don't think that you should be upset with FH about this.

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Well on the flip side my argument is that we don't get married EVERY sunday, this not a request we make of these people all the time. They are all adults, who have no trouble getting to work at 9 a.m, why should they have trouble getting to my RH at 10?

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

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Posted by bluegreen08

I think you are both right. We had a similar timeline and told family to come at 10am for pictures. My dad's step-mom didn't get the memo and booked a car service that wouldn't get her there until 11am. We did a quick shot with her before signing the ketubah, and had to get the extended family shot with her done in the bridal suite while we waited for the ceremony to begin.

Try to avoid taking as many pictures as possible during the reception. We did go back outside for a few BP shots we missed and shots of ourselves at the end of dinner, but why should YOU have to miss some of your reception to take pictures so that the extended fam can sleep in an extra 45 minutes?

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exactly! Can you call my FH and tell him this please?

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

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Posted by sweetdoublenn

Ooo than it has to be 10. I think they should make at least an effort..if not all can come then some? Would that work?

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I recommended this to him, I said tell them to come at 10 and who ever gets here, gets here. He didn't like that either.

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

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Posted by MikeandJess

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Posted by dante31300

I think that it's really unfair of you to ask his family to arrive early so that you can get photos out of the way so that you can party during your reception. While I understand why you would want to do this it is not very reasonable to expect that everyone will share your sentiments. And honestly if his family is that big I highly doubt they would all get there at 10 anyway so you would still have to take some of those family shots during cocktail hour or Reception. I don't think that you should be upset with FH about this.

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Well on the flip side my argument is that we don't get married EVERY Sunday, this not a request we make of these people all the time. They are all adults, who have no trouble getting to work at 9 a.m, why should they have trouble getting to my RH at 10?

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Yes but the incentive to getting to work on time is that they get paid for that. Not saying that your wedding isn't important b/c it is. But they may feel that as long as they are there for ceremony and reception that this is sufficient. I could see making this request to the parents but I'm not sure I would feel ok with extending it to the rest of the family. I think table photos would work out great. Especially if you plan on going around to each table to say thank you and receive your cards. This way you would still be able to enjoy the partying portion of the wedding.

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

we have to take pictures with our WHOLE families?!?!? What?

seriously though I didn't think I was doing this. The only people I thought we were taking pictures with like formal pictures was the bridal party, FH's mom dad brother and wife, and my siblings and grandmas and possibly my aunt and uncle and their 2 children (who are both in the bridal party) and my aunt/uncle and their 5 kids (since 3 out of 5 of them are in the BP as well) and they are good family friends of FH

I didn't plan on taking pictures with my aunts uncles cousins, great aunts etc. And I don't think FH did either. If we are walking around to tables during the Reception and my photographer is following i guess we can have him take a few...

so I AGREE WITH YOU haha in the case of if you want pics come early lol if not then dont come and if you get to them at the reception than fine if not than fine it's YOUR DAY !!!

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

How about during the cocktail hour?

Re: Fight with FH - who's right?

I'm with you on this one Jess - one hour early is not too early!! It's not much to ask for - you want to be able to take your pics and then enjoy the party!