Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

I am just curious how anybody else would feel about this situation.

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

I would be as long as the wedding was not kept extremely small.

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

I would be terribly hurt, especially since your wedding was just last summer.
I know people will say that you don't know his circumstances, and that's true, but I think that if he didn't feel close enough to invite you to his wedding, he should have declined yours and saved you the money. This says to me 'I like you enough to party on your day, but not enough to have you at mine', which isn't nice!
I'm sorry Cindy, I hope I didn't just make you feel worse. I meant to be supportive, but I think this came out sounding more negative than I intended.

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

yes, it would bug me in your situation

Its happened since our wedding, but not with people that bother me (co-workers of Al's - we invited them all but knew they weren't coming to NY for the wedding. So it didn't bother me when we didn't get a reciprocal invite).

Do you have other siblings they'd have to invite if they invited you?

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

I agree with JeanRenee, If I couldn't invite someone to my wedding becasue of keeping it small, I would not go to their wedding.

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

I agree. it would bother me if I invited them to my wedding and didn't receive one back. Of course, there may be reasons why. See if you can find out if they were having only family, or another reason before getting really upset.

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

Yes, I think it would bother me. But can you look at it that it saved you from going out to buy a dress and have to give a monetary gift??? Sorry, just trying to help...

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

I would be very, very hurt. When we were planning our wedding, I insisted that I be allowed to break our 'just first cousins' rule to invite my Mom's cousin's kids...my reason was b/c we are all the same age (approx.) and we grew up together.

Well, they got married this past October and DH and I were not invited to this wedding. I was *very* hurt by the omission....(I think I still am a little).

I also had a similar thing happen to my parents...we invited close family friend to my wedding and their daughter got married the following year and my parents were excluded from the guest list. My Mom has since vowed to never include them in another family function - at least not any that she or I hosts!

I think you have every right to be hurt!

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

Thanks all. Jennrenee...no you didnt sound negative. Actually, your thoughts are exactly the way I feel.: EMO8: I know they are not having a small wedding. I agree with what some of you said, I would of declined someones if I wasnt intending to invite them to mine. My mom said they are probably having a problem keeping the count down, but we had major problems keeping ours down due to my husbands job. Just makes you feel really bad though.

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

Claud, it sounds like you would understand then. Yes, it does hurt. I guess I am always trying to make sure I do the right thing and try not to offend or hurt anyone and I forget that people arent always the same way. I cant imagine that the invites are going out this late. I thought about it and realized that I am probably not receiving one. My mom didnt receive hers since she is having her mail forwarded to fla and it takes a while, but still I would think I would of received one by now. Gee...I hope the bride doesnt use this board

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

I agree I would be very hurt

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

Cindy, I understand that you're hurt, and I would be in your shoes as well. I do think you should have been invited, but at the same time, I don't think that your parents' friends should have not attended your wedding. After all, at the time of RSVPing to your wedding they may not have thought about the exact guestlist. Just playing a little Devil's advocate

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

In this exact situation - it would probably bother me too unless the wedding was kept really small.

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

Alina,
It is not my parents friends. It is their son. My parents are invited to his as his parents were invited to mine but I also included him and he came. It just makes you feel bad.

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

I would definiitely be upset! I agree with stacedz!

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

there's still a chance that you're invited. We're invited to a wedding on 4/19 and invites haven't gone out yet. (Its our neighbor's/landlord's wedding and I know she just got the invites on Saturday. I signed for the package.)

but if you're not invited, you have every right to be hurt. I think its especially hurtful since the weddings are so close together. If this was a few years from now, you could understand that relationships have changed or whatever.

We had a situation at our wedding where we invited a 'fringe' friend because the rest of the friends group was invited and his parents were too (because they're close with mine). He didn't come to our wedding (told his mom he couldn't afford to) and now his wedding is in Nov - I wonder if we'll be invited.

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

Lisa- Like you said, if the wedding were a few years apart I would feel very different, but the same year, it just makes me feel bad. I just feel insulted that I thought of someone enough to have them and they didnt feel the same. I hope someday I can figure out how some people think.

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

Cindy, I would be very hurt. If they were having a very small, private wedding then I would totally understand and even send them a congrats gift BUT if they are having large wedding and left us off I would be hurt.
Of course, there is little you can do about it though. I would probably not include them in anything else though.
Don't be too upset, we all love you and think of it as saving a few hundred bucks.

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

I suppose I might feel hurt, but I wouldn't take it personally because there may have been so may deciding factors.

My MIL made it pretty clear that we'd be starting World War 3 if we didn't follow the 'relationship strata' - if this cousin of hers was invited, then these other 12 (with spouses) all had to get invites too. We had to leave off her cousin's children (who we really wanted to have there) because it would have increased the guest count by about 50, since we would not be allowed to invite only the ones we new well. Thank goodness my mother was much more easy going.

The bride and groom may have really wanted you there, but may have been told that inviting you meant they had to include several other relatives of equal standing on that 'relationship strata'

Re: Would it bother anyone if someone that was invited to your wedding didnt invite you to theirs

I guess it would bother me if I thought I was close to this person and they didn't invite me. I mean if I only invited them to my wedding out of obligation then I guess I wouldn't care. It all depends on the situation -- they may only be having a small wedding.