Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

He has only been to one appt (photo) and nothing else!! I know most guys aren't into this kinda stuff but seriously I feel like I am doing it all by myself! I at least thought he would want to go to the DJ appt but nope, would rather go fishing or whatever......I know this was probably to be expected but I am still annoyed by it. Its like does he even care how things are coming along or anything????????

sorry had to get that off my chest.

TIA for letting me vent!

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

vent away ... breathe in and out , some guys are into it others are not, its no big deal

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

I'm in the same boat as you... So far only the florist he didn't go to, b/c i lay the guilt on thick. And, I only make appointments when HE says... B/c I KNOW he doesn't want to go. So, once he tells me when, then I make the appt., he CAN'T back down... haha.
You're not alone... guys just don't care of the details, the vendors...nothing. I'm still ltrying to get mine to pick out the tuxs!!!! OY!

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

haha i swear tho if he has issue with ANY of the things that i picked out or whatnot (which i dont think he would) He is going to be in BIG trouble LOL

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

I told FH right up front if you don't come you don't get an opinion. I even went to all the RH without him. We are both fine with it. If I waited for him to be able to come to all the appt we would never have the wedding planned.

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

tell him how you feel, although he might not have any interest in these things he should still go with you - its both of your weddings and i hate when i hear that some people have FHs that dont want to be involved in the planning.....if there is ever something that is important to you (wedding related or not) he should be there with you if you ask him - at least that is how i feel, especially if you are going to marry this person....does that make any sense? for example, my FH loves hockey, i on the other hand could live without it - but its something that he enjoys, it is something that is important to him, so when he plays in a game i will go watch if he asks me to - or if he wants to go to a hockey game with me i go - and i go because i love spending time with him even if we arent doing something that only i like doing, im happy to see him happy - and he is the same with certain things that i enjoy...get what i mean?

for the wedding we have done everything together - its OUR wedding and we both care about it, its important to us, because its our day....maybe you can try explaining it like that to him?

it may just be because a lot of guys associate wedding planning with being the girls job, or they think that its gay of them to tag along but some guys feel that way hahahaha, but its really not like that at all when you are doing it together - at least i didnt think so, we had fun - and also because we are paying for the wedding ourselves we both wanted to make sure we were happy with the vendors we were paying for...

dont worry, maybe when it gets closer he will come around!

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

SOme guys are into this and other are not. It depends on the guy I guess. My FH has helped me because he likes to get everything done and know what is going on. But, I have friends who's guys don't really get into it because they think it's the ladies' job.

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

I am so sorry that you are dealing with a FH that doesn't want to be involved in planning. some guys are just that way!

I agree that he now doesn't have a right to say anything about the decisions you have made.

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

It's still over a year away....give it time.

My FH only cares about price, I have free reign so long as we stay within budget and incorporate things we both love....Mr. Met is coming to our reception! He wont do any research but once I present him with a packet of options (which probably took me 4-5 hours to research) he has no problem selecting finalists and then going to a couple of appointments.

What does your FH love? Maybe he can get really excited about planning the honeymoon? Don't take his disinterest in planning as personal, I'm sure he loves you very much!

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

AW! It's ok! My FH didn't come to anything with me either lol. Some guys just aren't as into it as we are. They popped the question and now all they have to do is show up.

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

delegate, my friend. i gave FH the dj and limos to handle all by his lonesome. it took him 4 months to book a dj, but at least i didn't have to stress. give him jobs you think he can handle.

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

Its ok! Thats what we are here for! Some FHs love it and some just don't! Many of my friends are planning their wedding alone, some are loving it b/c they can make all the decisions and some, like you, are having a hard time. My FH is Groomzilla in the making

Why don't you talk to your FH and let him know that you would really like him to be a part of the planning.

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

My FH has been good so far, he's come to check out the RH, DJ, and photo/video appts,and the church. He will probably help me with the limos but I doubt he will come to the florist appt, which is fine by me, I know guys could care less about flowers!

He was there for the important stuff and if I simply and calmly ask him for help (like when we were making our std magnets) he will help me.

Have you talked to him about it? Tell him it hurts your feelings and you understand these details aren't important to him, but you'd like his help on SOME things.

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

my fh is the same way.... i take my mom with me everywhere... we wemt to over 15 rh and i took my fh my top 2... and then told which one i wanted.

same thing with dj took him to the one i wanted and we booked...

he didnt even meet our videographer yet!!!

or see the limos!!!

sometimes i get upset because he doesnt care.. but then when he gives his suggestions they are ridiculous!!!

like with limos he didnt want a vintage car, just a regualr limo.... WHAT..!!!!!. the purpose of the car is for pictures (we are getting a bus for all of the bp

so we got the vintage car!!!

so look at it that way!!

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

Thats how most of them are. He probably figures its your day mostly so hes giving you free range to do what you want. But as for appts he should be there!

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

All my FH cares about is the dance we're gonna do as our first dance.. Thats it.. Hasn't seen the RH. won't go to appointments... Your not alone.. Sometimes I want to beat him because I feel like I'm alone in this/

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

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Posted by soon2bMrs P

He has only been to one appt (photo) and nothing else!! I know most guys aren't into this kinda stuff but seriously I feel like I am doing it all by myself! I at least thought he would want to go to the DJ appt but nope, would rather go fishing or whatever......I know this was probably to be expected but I am still annoyed by it. Its like does he even care how things are coming along or anything????????

sorry had to get that off my chest.

TIA for letting me vent!

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I felt and still sometime feel the same way, but believe me there will be a day in your planning where FH wants to get involved and then he will tell you you can't do that, or he doesnt like it, and you will be thankful that he didn't come to anything else
Just take your mom or someone close to you... Its ***** but the day will be so much better than all the planning!

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

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sometimes i get upset because he doesnt care.. but then when he gives his suggestions they are ridiculous!!!

LOL mine too so I guess the silver lining can be that I get to stop that before it even starts

like the fact that he wanted lamps as centerpieces instead of flowers......

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

i think once its 2009 it will really hit him.. DH had no time last year b/c he was graduating and we planned our wedding around his graduation.. so i would talk to all the vendors and pick out 2 or 3 and we would go and meet with them and then decide together.. he hates to haggle with vendors and he would just be ok with whatever price the vendors would quote..

Re: Feel like the wedding is gonna be a total suprise for FH......

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Posted by BarbieGrl10

Its ok! Thats what we are here for! Some FHs love it and some just don't! Many of my friends are planning their wedding alone, some are loving it b/c they can make all the decisions and some, like you, are having a hard time. My FH is Groomzilla in the making

Why don't you talk to your FH and let him know that you would really like him to be a part of the planning.

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LOL I thought I was the only one with a groomzilla!!! Some men are involved and some aren't. My friend just got married and did everything with her sis and mother. I agree with that if it hurts you try to incorporate something that will interest him. Good luck!!!!