Thank You Card Etiquette

I have to send out some thank you's from the small e-party we had last week, and my FMIL put me in a bit of an awkward position, what would be the best way to handle this?

FBIL and his girlfriend gave us 3 gifts, a coffee press, a set of beer mugs, and a book of cocktail recipes (i guess we give off the impression of drinkers lol). It was clearly a joint gift, so my intention was to send one thank you card addressed to the both of them, to FBIL's house.

So when I asked FMIL for her extended family's addresses, she also gave me FBIL's gf's address, and said we should send her a thank you because the book was her gift.

Now, I know personally I would be offended if I got a seperate thank you card from FH if we gave a gift packaged together as a couple. I would take it as a slight to her status of girlfriend, and I don't want to offend her. I also don't know now to send the thank you card to just FBIL's name, or also put his gf's name on the outside of the card, because I think FMIL's issue was having it appear on the card like they live under the same roof.

Is this really an issue, or am I just being weird? I'm such a stickler for etiquette with things like addressing, ugh.

Re: Thank You Card Etiquette

I would write a thank you to the two of them and send it to FBIL, then I would write the separate thank you (since FMIL said it was necessary) and on it say I wanted to personally thank you for the book because FMIL said it was especially from you. Or something like that. This way your not slighting her status but your also acknowledging her own gift.

Re: Thank You Card Etiquette

I would just write the TY note to FBIL and his gf. Mail it to FBIL and address the gf inside the card.


Where are the pics from your party? Did I miss them???? I've been waiting!

Re: Thank You Card Etiquette

Hmm...I think I'm going to send the main card addressed to FBIL and address his gf inside the card, and send the seperate girly notecard thing to his gf only just so she doesn't feel left out or slighted, since I'm sure FBIL will take a look at the card, throw it out, and never relay the message to her that she was thanked lol.

I'm still waiting for pictures!!! They were taken on FBIL's camera, so FH hasn't uploaded them and sent them to me, I keep asking for them, but I shouldn't hold my breath

Re: Thank You Card Etiquette

I'd just write one thank you note. I'm assuming you're putting them both on one invitation? Same theory on thank you cards. For your shower thank you cards, though, you will need the girl's address. So might as well hold onto it for now!

Re: Thank You Card Etiquette

I would just write one thank you card, and address it to both of them at FBIL's address. I'm just thinking back to when FH and I first started dating, and I would feel weird getting a separate card if we gave a gift together. Why do FIL's have to turn everything into drama?

Re: Thank You Card Etiquette

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Posted by MLAngelo

I would write a thank you to the two of them and send it to FBIL, then I would write the separate thank you (since FMIL said it was necessary) and on it say I wanted to personally thank you for the book because FMIL said it was especially from you. Or something like that. This way your not slighting her status but your also acknowledging her own gift.

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ITA!

Re: Thank You Card Etiquette

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Posted by MLAngelo

I would write a thank you to the two of them and send it to FBIL, then I would write the separate thank you (since FMIL said it was necessary) and on it say I wanted to personally thank you for the book because FMIL said it was especially from you. Or something like that. This way your not slighting her status but your also acknowledging her own gift.

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ITA!