Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

My FH's father, his grandfather, an uncle, and a great aunt have passed away in the last 5 years.

Three of my grandparents, two uncles, 2 great aunts and a great uncle passed away in the last 6 years.

We were both very close to these people, and think it would be a nice gesture to honor them at our wedding.

The thing is: that's over 10 people! How can we do this?

I'm afraid a memory candle would be too big with all those names. Also, I don't want to be morbid, I don't want our older relatives in particular to be having a stroke when they are reminded of all their deceased family members! (not to sound flip, but I want to be respectful and joyful at the same time)

Re: Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

Although I do not have as many loved ones lost....I don't want to make a spectacle out of the widowers and widows either. Let's face it, it is going to be an emotional enough day!! But, I am attaching a small handwritten note card to each guests(who lost someone) placecards to let them know the deceased is remembered and with us on the wedding day...

Re: Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

We are having a similar problem... unfortunately we have lost a lot of peoplew between us in the last few years.....and not all of them older people. We were thinking of having my best friend, my sister (MOH) & his brother(BM) help us & have 4 candles, but we are not yet sure. We also need to speak with the church b/c I would want us all to light them before we walk down the aisle, not at the altar or as part of the ceremony.... I think that helps to make it less morbid.

Re: Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

My uncle and Fiances father are both deceased and we are going to have the priest mention that we are thinking of our departed loved ones and that they are present in our hearts on this special day...We are also going to add something into our programs.

Re: Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

Thanks you guys, I like the idea of having the priest say something about the loves ones who couldn't be here but are in our hearts.

Re: Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

You could do the memory candle and on it it could say, in memory of all our loved ones. Then when you are lighting it you could have the priest name the specific people you are lighting it for. You could also include their names in the program if you are having one.

Re: Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

iVE SEEN candles where you can put I think 5 or 6 names on each, maybe you could get a few of those. Im sorry for all of the losses of yoru loved ones.

Re: Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

I was just at a wedding yesterday and they had one in honor of the groom's younger brother who passed away. I think it is a very nice gesture. The priest mentioned him, and the bride/groom lit the candle.

Re: Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

My grandma passed away about a week ago, so i am going to leave any empty chair and a single red rose with her picture on the chair

Re: Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

nickrocs...what a sweet idea

Re: Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

Yeah i fell in love with the idea i thought wow what a wonderful way to remember someone

Re: Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

That is really sweet and such a lovely idea! Sorry for your loss.

Re: Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

Thanks girls

Re: Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

What about if you lit one candle and edited a picture of each of them together into a photo montage. Put in in one frame by the candle and lit it during the ceremony?

Re: Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

we have 4 grandparents we'd like to honor in this way.

i never thought about it as being morbid- fh's aunt passed away at a young age a month ago and we want to honor her also. but i don't want to upset his uncle or their two 20-something children.

we were thinking of dedicating a song to her during the reception- but now i'm worried about bringing people down.

i guess i little note in the program would be a nice idea and then you could list their names.

i also like the placecard idea with a note. this way it won't put people on the spot??

Re: Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

we made a note on our program...

but for DH's father we chose a day that was important to him (Bastille Day since he was French) and we wrote about the importance of that day in the program as well

Re: Memory candle/honoring deceased loved ones

We had a pascal candle lit at our ceremony.

In my program I just mentioned that the pascal candle was lit in memory of our grandmothers and other friends and family members that have passed away but are here in spirit.