Good/Bad idea???

I'm writing a book about my experiences with my inlaws and the more I write, the angrier I feel. It's like with every chapter, I feel all that resentment heading for the surface. Husband DOES NOT know I'm writing it - he would be blown away. It's amazing how it all comes back, every detail, every dirty little indescretion against me. Do you think this is healthy or do you think I should give it up and let it go? Out of the ten years of my relationship, I'm on year eight and this is where things went from bad to incredibly ugly....

Re: Good/Bad idea???

It'll probably end up being a bestseller!

Re: Good/Bad idea???

I think its a good idea...you are getting your anger and frustrations out on paper...rather than killing someone like I bet you want to do!!

Re: Good/Bad idea???

I think it is probably good therapy to get these frustrations out because then you can deal with them accordingly. However, if you want to maintain any relationship with your inlaws (and potentially, your husband), I would think hard before seeking publication. Venting about your inlaws to friends, etc. is one things; letting the world know about it is quite another.

Re: Good/Bad idea???

I think as long as you are using this as a construction tool to begin to let go of this anger and move-on NOT forgive, but let-go then it is great. If you are using it to get madder then I would stop- as that is not doing anyone any good.
I would NOT send the book pages to ANYONE without your husband knowing about this project. This might be a best seller but it could also ruin your marriage if you ever went truly public with your feelings about his family.

Re: Good/Bad idea???

Right now, I have no relationship with inlaws at all (except husband's grandmother). I don't seet them, communicate with them, etc. My husband, he would never even find out or suspect that I would do something like this.

My sister is a published writer and I was going to give it to her to ghost-write for me and change things around (names, etc.). My fear is that it would actually GET published and somehow I would be found out.

I'm just afraid of my emotions getting the best of me because I'm hitting an especially hard time in our relationship (when was it ever easy it seems?) and I know I'm going to carry those feelings home with me. I write during quiet times at work...

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I don't think it's a good idea to keep it from DH. Does he know of your anger with ILs? I have a lot of anger and resentment toward my FILs but FH is fully aware (and understands, usually).

I think if DH finds out about your book without you already sharing with him, it will be a battle between you two because it will put him on the defensive, which is probably not what you need or want.

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It depends. Do you feel better or worse now that your feelings are out on paper? If the answer is yes, then I would go ahead and write it however, if it were me, I would talk it over with my husband first. It is one thing to keep a diary for your own purposes and another to put it up for sale and have everyone know your business.

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Oh believe me Eileen, he is aware of the problems. Heck he's been front row, center stage to most of the battles and even has become a participant every now and again. A few months ago when things were bad between us I almost spilled my intentions during a heated moment. But thankfully I stopped myself because in all honesty, the book is not objective at all. He wouldn't understand it because he doesn't 'get it' when it comes to his mother and her manipulations.

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Write it. It's good for you and when you make your first mill, he won't be mad :)

Re: Good/Bad idea???

Hey, you know your husband better than anyone. Personally, I wouldn't seek publication because my husband would probably divorce me if I aired our dirty laundry to the world. But, JMO.