How Did You Know

How did you know you were ready to have another child? I have a 5 year old now and DH wants to have another child. I don't want to and don't know if I ever will. I love my daughter so much and I'm happy with just her. Am I being selfish? Any only childs out there? Did you feel like you were missing out?

Re: How Did You Know

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Posted by LADYL

How did you know you were ready to have another child? I have a 5 year old now and DH wants to have another child. I don't want to and don't know if I ever will. I love my daughter so much and I'm happy with just her. Am I being selfish? Any only childs out there? Did you feel like you were missing out?

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I always knew I didnt want to have just one child. When I was pregnant and as soon as Jeremy was born I felt SOOOOO guilty that I am depriving Emma of my attention and love. Boy was I wrong. I love both my children equally with all that I am. I dont think your being selfish. Its a tough call and a personal decision.

Re: How Did You Know

Thats hard to answer! I have a 7 year old, I couldn't imagine going back and starting all over again, he is at such a great age! My son is from a previous relationship though. My Dh really wanted to have children, it took me 2 years to decide - because at 5 he is in school, I didn't have to pay the phenominal fees of day care, and to be perfectly honest I didn't think I could love someone as much as I love my little guy!
After much though, like I said 2 years, I decided I really wanted another one, my son wants a brother/sister, and I am ready to start all over again, only now, I have a husband who will be there to help me! Now, I am expecting twins and could not be happier!

eta: and to answer you - I absolutely do not think its selfish to only have one child!

Re: How Did You Know

I am an only child and I must admit I have always wished for a sibling. Yes, its something that I feel was missing somewhat but I had wonderful parents and that is what was most important! Your daughter has a wonderful mom and dad and while, at times, growing up she may wish for a sibling, she has what is truly important- great parents!

Re: How Did You Know

I don't know if this will help you but, I don't have any children yet but I have two sisters and my Dh is an only child. Since he doesn't have any siblings he doesn't understand the bond me and my sisters have. I think he missed out on a lot being the only child. I know its different for everybody and since I don't any any children right now I can't really relate to you situation. But I have told my DH when the time comes and we do have children I want at least two so they get to experience that bond. JMHO, hope this helps.

Re: How Did You Know

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Posted by casey31

I am an only child and I must admit I have always wished for a sibling. Yes, its something that I feel was missing somewhat but I had wonderful parents and that is what was most important! Your daughter has a wonderful mom and dad and while, at times, growing up she may wish for a sibling, she has what is truly important- great parents!

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Thanks Casey! That's what I tell my DH

Re: How Did You Know

I am in the opposite position. My son is 2 and I would love to have another one but DH says NO! ( for right now) although he cant give me a time frame in which he would like to have the next one.
I think its a personal choice and I don't think it is selfish for you to not want to have any more children.

Re: How Did You Know

Mrs. Z are you bothered by it? Does it upset you? My DH gets pretty upset at times.