HOLIDAYS???

Ok, who is going where for which holiday?
(HEHE) Time is creeping up on us. We have had Yom Kippur dinner at our place and are planning to have Thanksgiving- for whomever decides to come.(cant even get into THAT right now!)

What about you guys?

HOLIDAYS???

Quite the issue, aren't they? :(

Well, after Paul moved in last October we encountered this. Ideally, we tried to get both of our families together but our image of familial harmony was a big illusion. Everyone gets a little weird re: holiday traditions...sigh.

HOLIDAYS???

We have the same problem since we live by both sets of parents. We typically spend the day with one side and then have dinner/dessert with the other. The approach that we are staying put and everyone can come to us won't work. We both have large families (I have 4 brothers & sisters and he has 3 brothers). My oldest brother tried that for Christmas and it was the most uncomfortable holiday we ever had. Things will change when we have children. We will only make one stop per holiday and everyone else will have to deal. It's definitely not the best part of marriage!

How funny this is, My husband is the opposite, he hates shelves. He wants everything put in drawers or closets. He is a neat freak. But also doesn't get the girly things that I decorate the house with (candles, curtains, bed ruffles). If he had it his way everything would be black, he's color blind, so our house must look crazy to him.

I told him when we buy a house, he can have his own room, or the garage to put all his 'junk' in it. I associate his junk with anything that does not look pretty, out in the open.

HOLIDAYS???

holidays for us is going to be hard.. i am a nurse and wind up working some of the holidays.. plus my family is from long island and his is from staten island. last christmas eve and christmas day i had to work. so he spent it with his family, so joking i said will will spend this christmas holiday with my family but he said that we had to divide the holiday.. the problem is on christmas eve my family has one side of the family over and christmas day we go to the other side so i wind up not seeing some of my aunts and cousins..plus when we go to his families house it's just the sister and his two brothers (it's boring)) so for now i have to suck it up and hope that we get a house real soon so i can have everyone over.

How funny this is, My husband is the opposite, he hates shelves. He wants everything put in drawers or closets. He is a neat freak. But also doesn't get the girly things that I decorate the house with (candles, curtains, bed ruffles). If he had it his way everything would be black, he's color blind, so our house must look crazy to him.

I told him when we buy a house, he can have his own room, or the garage to put all his 'junk' in it. I associate his junk with anything that does not look pretty, out in the open.

disappointing family

can also add something to the mix. I am Catholic and Rob is Jewish...and neither one of us is converting. But, he haas celebrated Xmas since he was little since he had some catholics in his family.
So, we will have a live christmas tree(YAY!) and a menorah.
But this year, Thanksgiving will be by us ...and I think christmas- especially the EVE will be by us.

i understand what you mean phyl

hi phyl, i totally understand where you are coming from with all of this. half of my father's side of the family boycotted my wedding this last weekend...and they live 15 minutes away. meanwhile, my great uncle on my mom's side flew in from arizona and practically all of kevin's relatives (from california, north dakota, minnesota and canada!!!) flew in. my dad was very upset and we usually have christmas with that side of the family. i am feeling really resentful and i don't want to go. kevin feels like we should be bigger than that, but i just don't know if i can handle putting on the happy face when i feel like they don't like me and don't support my new marriage. weird. anyway, phyl, i just wanted to let you know that you aren't alone. i think we have decided to fly to minnesota to be with kevin's family for christmas... his younger sister had a baby 3 days before the wedding and obviously couldn't come and we want to meet *our* new nephew! hang in there... hugs,leighann

Thanks so much for that weblink, I acually found some things that I liked for the kitchen and bathroom

thanks for understanding

Leighann and everyone here on the board. I think that one or 2 of u may have heard about my family shenanigans b4. It is distressing. and the Holidays do not ease it. BUT, as I keep telling myself, WE are making our OWN traditions and the best time to start is when you are Newly MARRIED, right?

hehehe...Ok- lets put on a happy face, it's Monday, and things an be worse.
Thanks again, for the support!

HOLIDAYS???

Heather - can you tell me how you plan to raise kids? I am Jewish, and my husband is Catholic as well.
I dont know how to handle this all right now we are not talking cause she was mad that I was 'not going to ask my husband to pick me up and .. what kind of marriage do you have that you can't ask him'
I need pointers! I plan on calling her tonite and know whatever I say will set her off.

HOLIDAYS???

Wow. Reading what everyone has going on with their holiday traditions makes me feel that I am not alone. My mother EXPECTS me and my fi to be at her house for Thanksgiving. I feel bad for her cause my father is very ill, he has M.S. and now that I am gone she is very lonely, I am an only child. On the other hand his parents are both well and he has two brothers and a large family. But on the other hand those ARE his parents and I am sure they want their son to be there. My mother is having Thanksgving at home and thats it. But in the past she would have it early so we can make it to his house for dessert. I am hoping this will work this year. Our apartment isn't big enough for a 13 person sit down meal. I am Jewish and he is Cahtloic so all the religious holidays work out. This is the only one... besides new years which his mother thinks he should be with his family every year. Ugh bring on January ! :)

Heather

HOLIDAYS???

I've read many books on the subject, and of course, the most religious will tell you that you can't do it. And, of course, your families might object because it seems 'contradictory' in some ways. But, as I view it, I see it as both religions welcoming my child into their religion, as s/he will be a product of both. I know that's not what they really mean, but that's how I've made peace with the idea. Good luck.
Everyone I spoke to said that it is not OK to have a bris and a baptism?????? I plan on doing it anyway (in the future).

But, we've agreed that there will be no confirmation, as well as no bar mitzvah, and although we're not happy about it, these were concessions we had to make. I'll let you know in 20 years how it all works out.

HOLIDAYS???

I like the way you think. Thanks for putting me at ease.

But, we've agreed that there will be no confirmation, as well as no bar mitzvah, and although we're not happy about it, these were concessions we had to make. I'll let you know in 20 years how it all works out.

HOLIDAYS???

HI Lauren
I dont plan on having kids for another 4 years or so. So far we figure we will bring them up both. I would like to do that. Celebrate both holidays for both religions. The only sticky subject is if we have a boy they are usually bar mitzvahed in the Jewish faith. So that would mean the child is brought up more Jewish than Catholic. My husbands mother thinks that the child should be brought up one religion and she doesn't seem to care whether it is Jewish or catholic. SO I guess my children will be more on the jewish side but not religious. My mother doesn't like the idea of a briss so that takes care of that religious ceremony. My husband and I are pretty flexible on this. It is just dealing with our parents on the matter which makes things difficult. What do you plan on doing?
I need pointers! I plan on calling her tonite and know whatever I say will set her off.

HOLIDAYS???

We're also planning on raising them as both, although it will be very difficult. We've looked into it, and found out that the children can be both baptized and have a bris (or naming, if it's a girl), so we will be doing both, at separate ceremonies (I don't expect my parents to come to the baptism and I wouldn't expect his to come to the bris).

We will celebrate both holidays (which means I get to celebrate Christmas, which I like).

But, we've agreed that there will be no confirmation, as well as no bar mitzvah, and although we're not happy about it, these were concessions we had to make. I'll let you know in 20 years how it all works out.

HOLIDAYS???

I am catholic and my husband is Jewish - we too will raise them with both religions.
Everyone I spoke to said that it is not OK to have a bris and a baptism?????? I plan on doing it anyway (in the future).

But, we've agreed that there will be no confirmation, as well as no bar mitzvah, and although we're not happy about it, these were concessions we had to make. I'll let you know in 20 years how it all works out.