I'm getting really tired...

...of the constant battle with my MIL! I'm sitting here crying because honestly what can I do without upsetting my MIL or DH?!?!?

As some of you may remember my FIL was diagnosed with cancer (Prostate to be exact). He went for an MRI today and we should get the results within 24 hours to find out if it spread or if it is containted. Well, while MIL was waiting for FIL to finish to his MRI she was telling me how scared and worried she was because it was taking so long. She was talking to me about it because she didn't want to worry his children. I don't know why she thinks I'm not worried at all!

Then I talk to my dad and I'm all upset and he tells me they are going about it all wrong. He had the biopsy, then the MRI but doesn't have a surgen and doing all their research off the internet about it all instead of talking to doctors. This makes me more upset. My family is HUGE into Sloan as my dad is convinced it saved my mom's life but when I spoke to MIL she told me she found a doctor on the internet that seems to be amazing at this certain kind of procedure. FOUND HIM ON THE INTERNET? And of course her kids know nothing because she doesn't want to trouble them or worry them.

Now, she doesn't speak to her mother or father FIL's parents are both deceased), doesn't have many friends, and her sister is the POS that wrote about me being 'The Jew' so she stopped talking to her. She doesn't have anyone to talk to. Her husband is complete denial, her kids are in the dark so they aren't upset, what am I supposed to do? Tell her I can't handle this stress and pressure and upset her even more (she has other family things going on and I'm surprised she hasn't had a stroke - knock on wood - or anything yet)? I told DH we need to talk about this but he told me he doesn't want to talk about anything or think about it until the MRI results come back. I don't want to upset him even more. SIL I tried to talk to but she's on the same page as DH.

If I didn't have you girls I think I would lose my freaking mind!

Ok vent over! Now lets just hope the results come in good and I don't have to keep that from DH again so his daddy can tell him when I'm not there I don't care what they say, I'm telling DH no matter what the results are!

Re: I'm getting really tired...

I'm not sure what I could say to make you feel better so hugs to you:

the results come back okay and hopefully you and DH can sit down soon and real talk about this situation.

Re: I'm getting really tired...

Your DH's family needs to talk to each other. Don't get me wrong it's great that you're there for the love and support as well. Just talking things out with people that are going through the same thing really does help. While my dad was waiting for the results on his cancer my mom was very tight lipped and wanted to be the rock through his surgery and treatment. I was worried that she was going to breakdown one day from the burden. She finally let go a little here and there and made her feel a little better. Who's better to be your support than your own family? His family needs to be a rock for the next person in the family and they'll be one right back.

If you EVER need to vent feel free to call/text/FM/email me!!!!!

Re: I'm getting really tired...

Thanks girls!

And I 100% agree Lauren! They just don't want to upset the next person. Franky's completely shutting me out to the point where we didn't talk for a week because he just wanted to be left alone and his sister is just trying to focus on other things. His mom just needs to realize that I'm just as upset, even if he's not my direct dad he's still my FIL.

I just hope tomorrow brings AMAZING news and we don't have think about it anymore!

((And I might take you up on the text/call/email if I need someone))

and people wonder why I smoke...

Re: I'm getting really tired...

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Posted by ourwedding9510
I just hope tomorrow brings AMAZING news and we don't have think about it anymore!

((And I might take you up on the text/call/email if I need someone))

and people wonder why I smoke...

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I hope you get some amazing news as well!!!

And I do hope you take me up on it - even if it's just to shoot a text or something to vent it out.

Re: I'm getting really tired...

I'm so sorry that all of this is falling on you. It's a hard time for everyone involved - I don't see why your MIL is putting it all on you, as if you aren't upset about the situation or anything.

Just as Lauren said, I would continue to encourage everyone to open the lines of communication and talk to one another. It's completely understandable to shut down and not want to deal with the situation, but by confronting it head on, it would probably alleviate a lot of the confusion and misunderstandings.

I hope your FIL comes back with good news