Re: This may be wrong to ask but...

If you get half back consider yourselves lucky. Unless your family is very generous or has substantial wealth, that is about the average. We spent about $24K with the honeymoon and we got $11K. You can't think about it too much. It's not a tangible until after the wedding and you certainly should not plan your wedding with that in mind.

Re: This may be wrong to ask but...

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Posted by melissaandsean

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Posted by prncssrachel

I'm expecting nothing. If I was hoping to get it back, I just wouldn't have spent it. Will it be nice if we get some money? Of course, but I am not expecting ANYTHING.

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same here!

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Ditto...and that's ok with us.

Re: This may be wrong to ask but...

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Posted by Mrs.Ptobe



To think of how many couples FH and I gave $200 to and thought that it was a good gift - it didn't even cover the cost of the meal... something I didn't think was the case until I started researching my for my own wedding.

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same here. I cringe everytime I think about what I gave people sometimes

Re: This may be wrong to ask but...

Wow, I'm surprised by these responses...usually when this topic comes up everyone bugs out I have no idea how much we'll get, but I have a feeling we'll get a bunch of non-monetary gifts from FH's step-mother's out of town family (yeah- don't even get me started on why they are invited).

Re: This may be wrong to ask but...

i wish we get back most or all of it. we are having approx. 60 pp. so if they give about 100 each about $6000. not even close.

Re: This may be wrong to ask but...

My brother and sil made a little under 40k..and magority of the guests were my family....so I can assume we will receive very generous gifts..BUT we aren't relying on that money for anything...

My parents are paying for our wedding and FIL's have been extremely generous as well..so I kind of feel bad knowing that we will receive a large sum of money from gifts for a wedding we didnt pay for ...

Fh and I are trying to find out a specific vacation spot that our parents have wanted to travel to and send them as a gift after the wedding..BUT my parents already boooked a trip for the week after my wedding..Nice right?? So we will see...

Re: This may be wrong to ask but...

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Posted by LIBrideinBWI

Considering FI's family is from Ohio, where it is considered tacky to give money as a gift - we are not expecting to make our money back.

The whole 'pay for your plate' thing is a completely northeast thing. We went to a wedding for his cousin a few years ago and he was SHOCKED when I suggested we write a check instead of bringing a gift....

Amy

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I am in the same situation as you! My FH family is from KY and it is also considered tacky to give money. Of course...I did not find this out until we went to his friends wedding and I wrote a check...my FH's other friend asked what we gave and I said money....didn't go over to well. Which to be honest I don't understand considering if you buy them a gift it is something form their registry that they picked out anyway. I guess it is just the difference in how the Midwest is vs. Northeast.

Re: This may be wrong to ask but...

We made a pretty respectable amount of money, but it still only came to about 1/4 of our total expenses.

Re: This may be wrong to ask but...

'expect' is probably not how you should word it. I 'hope' to get gifts, but we're having a wedding so that we can share our day with our friends and loves ones.

just an FYI though, my friend got married several yrs ago and her wedding cost $42K (in the early 90's) and she got about 25% of that amount in gifts.

Re: This may be wrong to ask but...

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Posted by JessicaM.

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Posted by melissaandsean

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Posted by prncssrachel

I'm expecting nothing. If I was hoping to get it back, I just wouldn't have spent it. Will it be nice if we get some money? Of course, but I am not expecting ANYTHING.

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same here!

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Ditto...and that's ok with us.

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Exactly!

Re: This may be wrong to ask but...

We made back a little more than 1/2. We werent counting on making it all back. We paid $85 p.p and had 150 ppl.
When I go to weddings, (I saved all my cards) I look into my cards and see what that person gave us.
If the person came alone and gave us 100, we go to her wedding and will double it.
If the couple gave us $200, thats what we give them. If we are in the wedding, we add a little more to it.

Re: This may be wrong to ask but...

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Posted by lvdolphins

We made back a little more than 1/2. We werent counting on making it all back. We paid $85 p.p and had 150 ppl.
When I go to weddings, (I saved all my cards) I look into my cards and see what that person gave us.
If the person came alone and gave us 100, we go to her wedding and will double it.
If the couple gave us $200, thats what we give them. If we are in the wedding, we add a little more to it.

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Thats exactly what we do now