What's going to change?

Maybe someone who has been through this can answer this question for me. My fiance and I have been together for 7 years, we have two childern together (4 and 3 months) and we have been living together for almost a year. Everyone keeps telling me things are going to change after we get married. How? What's going to change?

Re: What's going to change?

We lived together before we got married. Honestly - it feels pretty much the same!

Re: What's going to change?

Thank you. I didn't think anything would be different... besides my name.

Re: What's going to change?

---

Posted by Backinneyork

We lived together before we got married. Honestly - it feels pretty much the same!

---

I couldn't agree more. The only thing that changed was calling him my husband. I love the feeling though of being married.

Re: What's going to change?

we lived together before also- but it does feel different now- Better- but I can't explain it

Re: What's going to change?

---

Posted by Beth1210

we lived together before also- but it does feel different now- Better- but I can't explain it

---

Us too. It felt completely different. And it still does even though we have been together for almost 10 years and lived together for about 4. It instantly felt better, safer, like family.

I guess it depends on your particular situation, but I can honestly say it's not the same as when we were just living together.

Re: What's going to change?

DH and I had been dating for 9 years by the time we got married and living together for 4 years. I didn't think that anything would change or feel different but it has. For the most part things are the same...but there is this feeling that changed and I can't describe it. It's definitely different but I can't find the words to explain...but it's different in a very good way.

Even something as every day as coming home...he used to say I have to get home to my girlfriend/fiance but when I heard him say 'gotta get home to my wife' it really felt different.

Re: What's going to change?

we had a civil ceremony in 2000 and a church wedding last year, nothing changed for us at all...

Re: What's going to change?

I agree with those that said it just feels different! We were together for 8 years before getting married and although we didn't live together, that hasn't been the change (it's been a breeze there)---it's just that feeling that you are family, it's just feels so amazing! Last night I just said 'It's so fun being married' and DH agreed.

Re: What's going to change?

you know before we were married people said oh wait until after your married and I thought what do you mean, we lived together so what could change. honestly things do. Sometimes it is just a feeling and sometimes it feels that way with actually things.

Re: What's going to change?

Not too much changed overall for us. I do think I feel a higher level of committment than I did before we got married, and a certain amount of comfort in knowing we're both in it for the long haul. It's vague though, I wouldn't say much of substance changed between us.

Re: What's going to change?

my hub and i lived prior to getting engaged / married and physically nothing has changed. but emotionally... i feel the change. the bond is much stronger, tighter.. like we're more of a whole than ever before. that's the change hub and i felt.

Re: What's going to change?

---

Posted by Beth1210

we lived together before also- but it does feel different now- Better- but I can't explain it

---

Same here. It's different, more solid I guess. Like it's official.

Re: What's going to change?

We changed for us was the intensity of our feelings in that they're beyond a level we've ever experienced before because I didn't think that it was possible to love him that much more. And with that heightened feeling love came a great fear - because since I got married, I've never feared losing anyone the way I fear being without him.

Re: What's going to change?

---

Posted by SomethingBlu

---

Posted by Beth1210

we lived together before also- but it does feel different now- Better- but I can't explain it

---

Us too. It felt completely different. And it still does even though we have been together for almost 10 years and lived together for about 4. It instantly felt better, safer, like family.

I guess it depends on your particular situation, but I can honestly say it's not the same as when we were just living together.

---

I agree. It's hard to explain, but it feels better.

Re: What's going to change?

We lived together for 8 years before we got married and I didn't take his name...nothing has changed at all for us.

Re: What's going to change?

It all feels the same to me too. We've been together 11 years 6 months.

Re: What's going to change?

We also lived together before getting married.
The only thing that's changed is my name...of course...I still haven't officially done that yet either!

Re: What's going to change?

---

Posted by Beth1210

we lived together before also- but it does feel different now- Better- but I can't explain it

---

Beth, I agree with you. It does feel different. More secure and also more commitment.

DH and I lived together for 4 years before we got married. I didn't think it would change much, but it did. Now, I check with him before I go out, where I used to just go out and say 'by the way, I'll be home late,' stuff like that.

ETS: I just saw what Sasha posted, and she got it right. It feels more like a family (even though we don't have children YET)

Re: What's going to change?

It honestly just gets better ....we lived together for 2 years before marrying and now we are just tighter and more in sync.

All the stress from planning a wedding goes away and now its just good times!