Bridal party Question

Ok - heres the deal
I was talking to my parents abt who we are including in the Bridal Party, and I told him. My father suggested (he understands that I'm picking who I want) that i include my 1st cousins son to be in it too - as well as the 4 other children I picked. So my answer was: all three kids on my fathers side were married (one is getting married in July) and nobody picked me. (they all picked my sister and/or my brother - never me) so why should I pick 2 ppl from that side?!?! Soo my father hearing this, sd OMG! I didnt realize that! Thats not right - so then dont pick anyone on that side - now - its his sisters kids. They ARE my 1st cousins ...

here's where my question comes: Do you think that its necessary or it looks bad if I include 2 of FH's 1st cousins (one on his moms side - and one on his fathers side) and 1 1st cousin of mine (just on my moms side - none on my fathers side)??? FH sd I should do whatever I want - he doesnt think it looks bad - but I dont know .. I feel kinda bad and wrong to do that. Please let me know what you think

TIA!!

Re: Bridal party Question

Being from an italian family like u i know why this is causing u some grief right now because it's a touchy situation when u leave one side out. honestly i think that u should do whatever makes u happy - u shouldn't be picking people that u don't neccessarily want in your BP but are inluding because you don't want to offend anyone. I was worried about the same thing too but i talked it over with my parents and they told me that it's my wedding and I should have who I want in my BP, and not worry about who might get upset or take it the wrong way that i didn't ask their kid. so if i were u i would just follow my heart and ask only those people that I want close to me on my big day. HTH

Re: Bridal party Question

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Posted by pupidda122505

Being from an italian family like u i know why this is causing u some grief right now because it's a touchy situation when u leave one side out. honestly i think that u should do whatever makes u happy - u shouldn't be picking people that u don't neccessarily want in your BP but are inluding because you don't want to offend anyone. I was worried about the same thing too but i talked it over with my parents and they told me that it's my wedding and I should have who I want in my BP, and not worry about who might get upset or take it the wrong way that i didn't ask their kid. so if i were u i would just follow my heart and ask only those people that I want close to me on my big day. HTH

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so if i dont include anyone on my fathers side - no kids, no 1st cousin it wont look bad? my FH says i worry too much abt what ppl will say, and what ppl will think. he's prob right - but I feel like Im offending them, and making it seem like I dont like my fathers side of the fam if I dont pick at least one.

Re: Bridal party Question

I dont think it will look bad. You should have one of your cousins read. Plus youare closer to your cousin on your moms side... believe me you cannot please everybody..

Re: Bridal party Question

You need to remember this is about you and your FH - you are the 2 people that you are supposed to think about. So make sure that you think about what you and him both want. You shouldn't have to worry about keeping peace in the family. This is your day and no one elses. Have the BP that you want and don't sway from your gut feeling.

Re: Bridal party Question

I understand where your coming from, my first cousin didn't even invite me to his wedding (I was the only one in the fam, and haven't talked to him in a while), but I know my grandma will freak out if I don't invite him (granted, I am having a bigger wedding than he did).

Like others have said, the day is about you, and you should invite people to be in your BP with whom you are comfortable, not to make someone else happy. If you are closer to the cousin on your mom's side, then don't worry about offending anyone. I've come to realize that no matter what you do in a wedding, someone will not be happy, and what it really comes down to is what make you and your FH happy.