Re: who are you tipping?

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Posted by nylisa

We are tipping:
Maitre D
DJ & MC
Photographer
Videographer & Assistant
Limo Drivers (even though there is a 20% gratiuity charge on my contrat)
Flower Delivery Person
Makeup Artist
Hair Stylist

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This is all I tipped also.

Re: who are you tipping?

Right now I am not tipping photgrapher/videographer. One they are the owner, which I was going to do anyway, but then I was told you are already paying for the service. I don't know how the pictures or video will come out. Hopefully great but what if I tip them and I am dissattisfied with it all. If anything when I pick up the pictures I may tip then. JMO

Re: who are you tipping?

I don't know. I'm starting to think that maybe I should just start signing my paychecks over to these people.

My makeup artist wants $100 for me and $100 for my mom. Why should I tip him on top of that? If I went to his makeup counter at the mall, I'd get it for free!

The hairdresser wants $65 per person and she works for my Future-Uncle in law. She made her price, not him. So, why should I give her even more?

Photo and video each own their own companies. They established their own prices. If they wanted more, wouldn't they have put it in the price?

Why is it my problem that my hall isn't giving any of my 15% to their staff? If it was so horrible, then why does anyone work there?

Limo already REQUIRED me to pay 20% extra. I think I'd have to be insane to give more than that...

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

I aske FFIL (who used to be a limo driver) if we should tip our limo guy on top of the 20% gratuity... He said NO, unless they go out of their way and do something above and BEYOND their duty. But not for doing what they are supposed to.

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

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Posted by suven

I don't know. I'm starting to think that maybe I should just start signing my paychecks over to these people.

My makeup artist wants $100 for me and $100 for my mom. Why should I tip him on top of that? If I went to his makeup counter at the mall, I'd get it for free!

The hairdresser wants $65 per person and she works for my Future-Uncle in law. She made her price, not him. So, why should I give her even more?

Photo and video each own their own companies. They established their own prices. If they wanted more, wouldn't they have put it in the price?

Why is it my problem that my hall isn't giving any of my 15% to their staff? If it was so horrible, then why does anyone work there?

Limo already REQUIRED me to pay 20% extra. I think I'd have to be insane to give more than that...

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You have to do what YOU WANT to do...IMO with the people you mentioned, you shouldn't have to tip them.

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

I agree with you Suven. I am performing tasks here at my desk job and no one 'tips' me if I go pick up a fax for them when I am picking up my own cause its part of my job!!!

People will get a tip from me if they do something above and beyond. Until then, they should be happy what they are getting from me. The whole bridal industry is highway robbery. As soon as someone hears the word wedding, prices are jacked up. It stinks.

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

In my opinion - tipping the limo driver is completely unnecessary (esp if on a budget)
They tack on a 20% gratuity. how much more of a tip do they need? i think limos are completely overpriced so they get 20% of this overcharge already!!
I EXPECT excellent service already with a 20% tip!!! Short of saving my life - there's little they could do to earn more of a tip.

Does your hall tack on a 15% gratuity or a 15% service charge? They are VERY different. Service charges are not for tips.
I know that stinks but unfortunately the staff doesn't get any part of that. I think it is standard to tip on top of that.

My band doesn't want meals - they asked for the money from the meal as a tip I think that's fair. I'd rather have them play continuously anyway.

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

Here's who we tipped:

The Maitre' d ($2-$3 per person, we had 210, and we tipped him $500)
Bridal Attendant (she didn't do much, I think $20)
Photographer & Assistant ($100 together, they were with us all day)
Videographer ($50)
Limo Drivers (I think $20 each)
Hair/Makeup (had it done at the salon, $10 each)

I didn't tip:
The band...we fed them, that's enough
The flower delivery guy, didn't mean to, but we weren't there when he showed up

I think that's it.

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

The only people we tipped were the Limo driver (it was included in price), the Maitre D, the guy who we worked with at the hall to plan the wedding and the DJ

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

I agree, if it's the owner of their own business, no tips.

I plan to tip, the captain or matre'd, bridal attendant, hair and makeup people. For the limos, it's already included and I agree for three hours they are over priced, so I don't plan on handing over more unless they do something out of the ordinary.

Everyone is providing a service to us, so if it's not included in the price, I don't think that is my fault..

The only person I am not sure about is the photographer...

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

I just spoke to my reception hall and they said that only the Maitre'd and the Captain (which I assume is the same thing as a birdal attendant?) should be tipped. Ok so now I have to figure out how much. But anyway I am not tipping the dj or photographer cause they own their own companies. As far as the limos we agreed that we would pay the driver that picks us up from the reception to the hotel $50 but that's it, the 20% gratuity added on will be for the driver of our limo as is usually done. As far as hair and makeup I will tip a little something, we'll see how my money is!!

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

I think if your hall charges 18% gratuity.... that is the halls tip except the maitre'd
but please my gratuity was over $5,000...
DONT TELL ME THAT is their salary... that is their tip!!!

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

Here is what I tipped.

Hair: $25.00
Nails: $20.00 (was a full-set & pedi)
Makeup: $75.00 (for 3 people)
Officiant: $50.00
flower delivery: $20.00
Photographers: $50.00 each x 2
Band: $50.00 each x 9 - did NOT tip the band leader who gets paid $2000 just for him.
Wait Staff- our gratuity was 20% of our per person charge.. so that came to $3000
Executive Staff (Maitre D, Captains, etc) $1400
Bridal Attendant: $100
Limo Drivers $100 for 4 limos b/c they were EXCELLENT!!!

I tipped b/c each and every one of my vendors were amazing. They went above and beyond not only the day of the wedding but for the months b/f when they were working with me- and that is what you have to keep in mind.

I tipped my band b/c they actually learned a few songs for me- songs that were custom arranged for us. They had a rehersal and everything- so that is time out of their day to do something for us.

I also fed every member of the band $50.00 x10and the photographers $50.00 x 2

So- all told with tips & meals we paid: $5940.00

Yes, it was a lot of money- but if you want good service, you want the best vendors, then you cannot complain about price- b/c you get what you pay for.

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

At this point, I don't plan on tipping because everyone except for the vendors who are still mentioned in my bio have fallen apart! And, I did pay a lot of money to these people

edited to say: I am not tipping the makeup guy because he is getting paid $100 per person. He set his price and I agreed to it. I could have had him do my makeup at the mall for free. I think that $100 per person is a VERY high price to pay.

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

What is a Captain?

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

I spoke with my hall about that before I booked. Besides the other people (dj and phote and such) for the hall you tip your Matre D and your bridal attendent if you have one. The Matre D then splits his tip among the wait staff. We were told about 1-3 a head is normal for that, then the bridal attendent is based on how much work she has to do for you and help out, that is from 50-100 dollars.

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

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Posted by KarenB

What is a Captain?

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I believe the Captains are another layer of management below the Maitre D.... so they for example head a grouping of tables.

there are also the people that man the cocktail hour stations.. but not all places have a lot of these people if you are using chafing dishes instead of 100% manned tables.

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

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Posted by Sassyz75

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Posted by KarenB

What is a Captain?

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I believe the Captains are another layer of management below the Maitre D.... so they for example head a grouping of tables.

there are also the people that man the cocktail hour stations.. but not all places have a lot of these people if you are using chafing dishes instead of 100% manned tables.

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i think a captain is like a 'head waiter' or a 'team lead'...

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

I know Duet asks that you tip the photographers 10%. Are you really expected to tip the photographer?

Re: who are you tipping? edited to say: I think I just can't take it anymore

I'm tipping:
• 2 photographers, 1 vidoegrapher- $100 each (it's says to do so in my contract with Duet)
• Maitre'd- probably $300 for 200 people
• Bridal attendent- $50-75 depending on what she actually does
• Band- $25 a member if I feel they went above and beyond, otherwise nothing
• Hair and makeup- I know both girls, so I will probably get them each a gift and tip $50 each (I don't think they're going to charge me, at least I know makeup won't)

That's probably it. So if everyone does an awesom job, the max I will tip is $975. I don't think I should have to dish out any more than that. If I'm feeling generous maybe I'll give the flower delivery person $25 to bring my total to an even $1000.