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Jewish Brides
luvsun27
Posted: Nov 18, 2003 04:57 PM+

Posted: Nov 18, 2003 04:57 PM
Re: Jewish Brides
Ok...what is a Ketubbah? I never had a Bat Mitzvah so I don't know a lot of things I probabaly should....thanks :)
sun86moon
Posted: Nov 18, 2003 05:11 PM+

Posted: Nov 18, 2003 05:11 PM
Re: Jewish Brides
hi, a ketubah is the marriage certificate. Your rabbi can provide one or you can get a decorative one. Judaica stores sell them or you can buy one online, i'm sure.
groovypeg
Posted: Nov 18, 2003 06:33 PM+

Posted: Nov 18, 2003 06:33 PM
Re: Jewish Brides
i feel really guilty about not having a kosher wedding. we booked our hall before i decided to convert (even though i had been taking classes for almost a year, i did not make up my mind until late april and we booked the hall in february). i asked the NRC how much more it would be if we had it kosher and it was insane how much more it would be. our compromise is that we are not having any shellfish or pork products at the wedding. but when i went through my conversion the bet din really gave me a hard time about this. my fh's father is practically orthodox and i know he is not happy. sorry for babbling, but i am so glad we have this thread.
mrswask
Posted: Nov 18, 2003 06:35 PM+

Posted: Nov 18, 2003 06:35 PM
Re: Jewish Brides
If it's really important to your fiancee's family - maybe see if they can help out with the price difference for kosher meals - just a suggestion - we are not having kosher wedding - but will order meals if people want them (not too many will need - maybe 10) and same thing - no pork or shellfsh!
groovypeg
Posted: Nov 18, 2003 06:41 PM+

Posted: Nov 18, 2003 06:41 PM
Re: Jewish Brides
we are having something like 20 glatt kosher meals catered in probably from sopranos in great neck or hapisgah in flushing.
Jax430
Posted: Nov 18, 2003 08:34 PM+

Posted: Nov 18, 2003 08:34 PM
Re: Jewish Brides
Hi everyone - this is a great idea! I feel like planning a Jewish wedding is so different in many ways, so it's great to have a place we can chat.I am having a Kosher wedding. My dress is strapless. I wasn't sure if my Rabbi, who is pretty traditional, would approve, but I posed the question to him as, 'Is a long veil sufficient for covering my shoulders,' and he said yes, so I got my strapless gown! My BMs are also wearing strapless gowns, with shawls during the ceremony (the dress comes with the shawl, so it worked well).
Jackie
Jax430
Posted: Nov 18, 2003 08:41 PM+

Posted: Nov 18, 2003 08:41 PM
Re: Jewish Brides
A great book that answers a lot of Jewish wedding questions is 'The New Jewish Wedding' by Anita Diamant.
nsgraham
Posted: Nov 18, 2003 10:46 PM+

Posted: Nov 18, 2003 10:46 PM
Re: Jewish Brides
My wedding glatt was kinda a compromise. No one really needs it to be, but my FI's family won't eat non-kosher meat (but would have done a meat and milk thing), and my family insisted on meat. So there you go.My grandma's gonna pitch a fit over the cake. She's all right with me converting, as long as I don't 'go crazy with it', but this cake thing is gonna be a problem, I know it. And yes, she's paying for a 1/3 of the wedding, so she does have a good amount to say.

Nadine
Smolokoff
Posted: Nov 18, 2003 10:57 PM+

Posted: Nov 18, 2003 10:57 PM
Re: Jewish Brides
mrswask...i think you and FH both sign ketubah, so your brother can't sign because he is your relative. Plus someone told me that in Jewish tradition your family becomes his family so your brother is kind of related to FH so he can't sign. Check with Rabbi to be sure.
Barakabella
Posted: Nov 19, 2003 12:16 AM+

Posted: Nov 19, 2003 12:16 AM
Re: Jewish Brides
I really like this! I am another one!To answer questions ( I was raised orthodox and know a lot of this stuff )
1. do you need to cover your shoulders or if the veil is long enough does that count? i had a conservative conversion and i am having a conservative rabbi officiate.
--Totally dependant on what your rabbi calls it. I am wearing sleeves out of respect although it could go either way...indeed, my dad, a rabbi is marrying us so he is pretty cool about the whole thing.
2. who signs the ketubah? i was told it had to be someone who was jewish and not a relative but also leads a very jewish life (i.e. keeping kosher etc).
--Two unrelated to you Jewish people--if orthodox, they need to be able to sign their names in hebrew. Otherwise your rabbi may allow them to sign in English.
3. does my father have to wear a kipah (sorry for the spelling if wrong)? we are not getting married at a temple?
--Again the answer is based on the custom declared by your officiant. We are handing out yarlmulkes -- as a general rule of thumb you would have mens head covered (and if orthodox, married women) during a religious ceremony, easily available on the web.
I think we got ours at www.yarlmulkes.com
Got our GORGEOUS ketubah from gifted artist Stephanie Caplan www.theketubah.com
Agree with the post on Anita Diament's book--filled with lots of info. I am happy to help anyone with questions to the best of my a bility. Please feel free to post or FM me!
LOVE this thread!
Jess2
Posted: Nov 19, 2003 08:44 AM+

Posted: Nov 19, 2003 08:44 AM
Re: Jewish Brides
Can I ask what you girls are thinking of doing for favors? Where we are getting married is kosher, and I think that any sort of food is out.
May05Bride
Posted: Nov 19, 2003 09:17 AM+

Posted: Nov 19, 2003 09:17 AM
Re: Jewish Brides
Another jewish bride here.
I am going to have a non kosher wedding, without pork, but with shell fish. No one in my family or his is religious so we didn't worry about that.
My dress will probably be strapless, or off the shoulder, so other than the veil, I won't have anything covering it.
I will be getting married at Leonards.
As for how to keep the Yarmulka's on the head, its usually done with pins.
Also, there are many different favors that could be given out at weddings other than food. Like, silver bottle openers, picture holders , candles.. kinda depends on what the theme of the wedding is.
Chloegirl
Posted: Nov 19, 2003 09:19 AM+

Posted: Nov 19, 2003 09:19 AM
Re: Jewish Brides
Im also a jewish bride and love reading your posts.Jess - I am doing a donation to the American Heart Association. FI grandfather and My Dad died of a heart attack and stroke..so we thought it was fitting. I have been to 9 weddings this year so far and still have one more...all but one was jewish and nobody did favors....people tell me most jewish weddings dont give favors.
MindyL28
Posted: Nov 19, 2003 09:25 AM+

Posted: Nov 19, 2003 09:25 AM
Re: Jewish Brides
I love this thread!!! Great idea!!!As for favors, as the above poster said, favors are not typically give at the Jewish weddings that I have been to. Some give out boxes of mints with the couple's names on it. I've also seen the table card in a picture frame that the couple can take home. That's a cute idea.
We're getting married on July 4th and although we are NOT having a themed wedding, we'll probably give something out (mints or kosher chocolate) that is wrapped in something patriotic.
PrincessRose
Posted: Nov 19, 2003 09:28 AM+

Posted: Nov 19, 2003 09:28 AM
Re: Jewish Brides
Our favors are home-painted votives filled either with candles or mini bags of M&Ms or Hershey kisses in our colors (blue, silver, and purple). You can get the colored candy at Dylan's Candy Bar in Roosevelt Field, and I'm sure you can find them other places too. Just not sure where.And the Candles work well for people who won't eat the chocolate, although I think M&M's and Kisses are kosher. Not sure about that either.
Barakabella
Posted: Nov 19, 2003 09:30 AM+

Posted: Nov 19, 2003 09:30 AM
Re: Jewish Brides
I am thinking of a scent with a tag. I picked flowers with no scent so I love the idea of having the smell of potpourri as they walk into the room.My wedding is glatt kosher (mainly as a respect to my mom) even though the majority of guests do not care. I would avoid food as favors--too iffy. Rarely are favors a part of a Jewsih wedding but I like the idea and found them pretty inexpensively.
Jess2
Posted: Nov 19, 2003 09:35 AM+

Posted: Nov 19, 2003 09:35 AM
Re: Jewish Brides
Thanks girls! I guess I didn't realize that favors were not part of Jewish weddings. Chloe, I'm so sorry about your dad & grandfather. Check your FM.
Smolokoff
Posted: Nov 19, 2003 11:10 AM+

Posted: Nov 19, 2003 11:10 AM
Re: Jewish Brides
I understand that favors aren't traditionally done at Jewish weddings, but is it wrong if we want to have them? I love leaving an affair with a little momento. I have a small collection of them. We were thinking of doing shot glasses. They are a little bit different, but also I collect them (I have around 400) and thought it would be kind of a statement about us. We aren't really having a theme.
Jax430
Posted: Nov 19, 2003 11:50 AM+

Posted: Nov 19, 2003 11:50 AM
Re: Jewish Brides
Usually, Jewish weddings don't have favors, but I see nothing wrong with it. I'm not doing it b/c my mom is very opposed to it and I'm choosing my battles. I like the idea of having small picture frames that initially hold the place cards.Edited to say:
We are having our centerpieces broken down and wrapped into small bouquets so that all the ladies can leave with some flowers. I think a lot of the temples do this now. We are keeping a few in tact centerpieces for ourselves, and our families, of ocurse. s
Nora101004
Posted: Nov 19, 2003 12:54 PM+

Posted: Nov 19, 2003 12:54 PM
Re: Jewish Brides
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