Re: Jewish Brides

---

Posted by May05Bride

I have been to an Orthodox wedding, of my teacher - and lets just say I wouldn't do it for myself. Women complained because they wanted to be with their FI and husbands, but you couldn't even see them. A lot, ended up spending the wedding outside, with their significant other.

---

This is exactly what I am afraid of. I trill want a frum wedding but greater part of my and FH's friends are not frum or even Jewish.


How do I balance and make everyone happy?

Re: Jewish Brides

My Fh's cousin is getting married at the Cedahurst Sephardic Temple this Sunday. I will post a review on Monday .

processional music

What music are you using for walking down the aisle for your wedding party and yourself? I'm pretty sure I want to use Jewish music, but I'm still not positive.

Re: Jewish Brides

It's funny that you ask about the music. I am trying to decide, also. The 'typical' wedding music shouldn't be used by a Jewish couple as both songs were written by notorious anti-Semites. I was thinking of just getting some of my favorite love songs together for the BP to walk down, and then one special one for me and my parents. Or maybe like a Disney theme or something. Is anything wrong with using Disney songs?

Re: Jewish Brides

i want to use pieces by bach and pachelbel. i hope this is okay. i do not want to offend anyone.

Re: Jewish Brides

Hey ladies,

Another Jewish bride here! Love this thread.

1- SHoulders- I am getting married in a conservative temple and am using the veil as my shoulder covering.

2. Kipah- My experience has beemn, if you are getting married in a temple, he should wear a kipah. All men, Jewish or not, are expected to cover heads out of respect. If you are marrying at a catering hall, then do whatever your father is comfortable with.
You can also find nice kipot at skullcaps.com

Re: Jewish Brides

engraved or jeweled rings- most conservative rabbis insist that the wedding band you get married in be solid metal. I think there can be etchings in it but no stones or breaks in the metal. Most brides get a diamond wedding band but get married in a solid gold ring that is their mom's or some other family member's.

music- we are going to have Jewish music to walk down the aisle. I'm not sure what that will be exactally but the ones I like so far are: Haray At, Dodi Li, Erev Shel Shoshanim. We'll walk back to Mazal tov Simin tov.

Re: Jewish Brides

As to separate dancing, I am not orthodox, but went to an orthodox wedding with separate dancing. It was one of the best weddings I ever went to. HOwever, all the played was Jewish music and most of the people at the wedding were orthodox and they really got into the separate dancing. If your guests will not get into it, it may not me much fun. What you may want to do is start the dancing separate and then start dancing together! Not exactly what the rabbis would recommend, but if your FI is not that religious, and this is a tradition you want to incorporate in your wedding, it may be a good compromise.


As to songs to walk down the aisle to. I think Pachobel's Cannon is one of the most common songs for Jewish Brides to walk down to. I am walking down to an Israeli song, Echol Echad Yeish, by Shlomi Shabat and Lior Narkis. I am having the DJ play it. It is a beautiful song with incredible lyrics. MY FH is Israeli and his family is flying in from Israel. My parents are also Israeli so I think it is very appropriate for us. However, appearantly this is considered an 'old fashioned' song according to my 16 year old FSIL. HOwever, I still love it!! Any ideas for receissionals?

Re: Jewish Brides

I have been thinking about separate dancing a lot lately as well as have been talking to many people. The idea of starting of separate and then combining people, is the best. It satisfies all. I will go with that, since I will have a mix of people comming to the wedding.

Re: Jewish Brides

hi girls, I was a Jewish Bride back last May so if you have any questions you can fm email me. I wish there was this thread back then. it would have been a great help and I did feel that there was not many jewish brides on here. Now it seems there are way more.

From the questions that I have been reading about here is what we did--

1. covering your shoulders. It really depends on your rabbi and what he feels is right. I got married at a conservative temple and the rabbi said it was ok not to cover my shoulders as well as the bridesmaids.

2. yarmulkes-- you can get them ponline but if you ae getting married at a temple that usually is included with the price. We upgraded for 1.00 to the black suede ones. Yes the groom should be wearing one when under the chuppah.

3. ketubbahs- again your rabbi needs to let you know what type you can get. Ours had to be conservative with the Lieberman clause( regarding the get and divorce) We were only allowed to have a male that had a bar mitvah and not a blood relative. A great place to go look and where I got mine was at Zion Lion.

4. processional and songs-WE used bach for the bridal party and for me walking erev shon shalim. After we were married simon tov.
The processional if you are at temples the managers know how it should go but lots of times there might be 3 or amilies involved.

anything else please fm me..

Re: Jewish Brides

Glad I could help!

Re: Jewish Brides

Still looking for a rabbi that will do an interfaith ceremony, can anyone help?

Re: Jewish Brides

Nora...do you have to have a rabbi? We are using Cantor Cohen...very nice man and will do interfaith. FH and I are both Jewish, but not very religious so we wanted someone who was reserved...and we are also getting married on a Saturday afternoon....I know, I know...it's a big no-no, but hey...that's what I wanted :)

Re: Jewish Brides

I think it does- it matters to my mom and since she is helping with the wedding. I'll have to ask her. Could you FM me the price for Cantor Cohen anyway please? Thanks

Re: Jewish Brides

Can I make a musical suggestion for those looking to enrich their ceremony?

There was an Israeli singer called Ofra Haza. (Unfortunately, she died in 2000 from AIDS) She had the most unbelievable voice and you can find her records in any major store like Virgin, HMV etc. Her songs are beautiful. I don’t understand Hebrew but the music is amazing and very ballad-like and she have a very powerful voice!

These was this one song in particular that I was so in love with, but because we already had all the ceremony music picked out and coordinated I wasn’t able to use it!

It the 'Gold Jerusalem' song, but she is not singing the words but just kind of humming the melody to the music. It would make just a dramatic statement if a bride came out to that powerful melody! It’s too late for me but perhaps someone else could use that idea!

Happy planing to all!

Re: Jewish Brides

Nora....FM

Re: Jewish Brides

Rabbi Alan Block does interfaith. He used to be in Brooklyn, and is now semi-retired and living in LI. He still does weddings (including ours). I can get you in contact with him if you want. FM me.

Heidi

Re: Jewish Brides

OK, fellow Jewish brides...have a question for you. FH and I both only have one grandmother left in our families. We each have an uncle (his father's brother and my mother's brother). We were thinking of asking our uncles to do the motzi together, but would like our grandmothers to have a role in the wedding as well. The only reason we aren't thinking of asking them to do the motzi is because it's supposed to be the oldest male in the family (my father was insulted when I mentioned the uncle thing, because he was wondering what he was going to get to do. I had to remind him that he's the FOB!!! Durr!). Anyway, any ideas on how we can incorporate our grandmothers into the ceremony/reception, but with a religious tone to it?

Edited for lack of proofreading.

Re: Jewish Brides

Speak to the Rabbi. See if there is a prayer or something like that for them to read together. Or one for each of them. Or maybe not a prayer, but a religious passage, something to do with marriage, but biblical.

Re: Jewish Brides

Why not have your grandmothers walk down the aisle? That would be an honor.