Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

I did not intend to invite my boss to our wedding...BUT.... the other day he came in asking a bunch of questions about the wedding,( when, where, how many people, etc.) It felt like he was hinting about an invite....
He lives in Florida and flies up to NY twice a month. Another co-worker is getting married in April and they invited the Big Boss and he is coming up for it.

Am I obligated to send him an invite?

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

I think it depends on what you do for a living and how small your wedding is. I don't think it's a must, then again, I did invite my boss.

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

I don't think you are obligated at all to invite 'the big boss' or any boss for that matter. I will be inviting my direct boss, but not the big boss. I think it's all a matter of personal opinion, but to answer your question, you are NOT obligated to invite anyone.

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

I am a teacher and I am inviting my immediate educational supervisor but not my principal. I do not have a relationship with her other than 'hello' or 'goodbye'.

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

I agree that it depends on the relationship you have with your bosses. I am inviting everyone I work with because we have to. FI and I work together and have a relationship with everyone because it's a small office. If you have a good relationship with your direct boss but not 'the boss' then just invite your direct boss. Good luck with your decision.

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

I invited my boss. I work in a small office (about 5 people) so I invited everyone.

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

Ya kinda hafta....do you like your job?

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

No, not at all.

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

Yes, every rule and etiquette book I have read says that you do not have to invite co-workers but it's 'career suicide' not to invite the boss...so I take that as it's kind of a must if you want to keep your job!

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

I don't think you are obligated to do anything. The etiquet is that if you invite your co-workers than you should invite the boss. If you didn't invite anyone from work, than you shouldn't

It also depends on your relationship. Do you think he expects to be invited? I would consider those questions because you definately don't want your boss to be 'upset' that he wasn't invited.

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

if its at all possible to so i would. i mean i am, i mean i think it's the right thing to do...you get my drift!

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

I don't think it is a 'must', but it is a nice gesture.

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

I am not inviting anyone from work- I started here in August and my guest list and budget were all done- with the exception of FIL's adding more!

I work with my MOH- I knew her before I started working here and she told me I didn't need to invite anyone..

It is a small office- so, we do one, we need to do them all. I feel a little guilty but I am not sure how much they really care about their employees- so screw that! They do not take care of us- so why should I spend money on them..

um, love my job

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

These are a few articles:

Congratulations! There's nothing more exciting than planning your wedding. Of course, with the politics surrounding the guest list, there's also nothing more hazardous to your mental wellbeing!

I recently got married myself but, for me, this was an easy question to answer. I like my boss and I was happy to invite her. I assume you're not as keen on yours, otherwise you wouldn't be asking.

So I hate to break it to you, but barring a few exceptional situations, you have to invite your boss (and your fiancé's boss as well). What are exceptional situations?

You're having an extremely small wedding; just immediate family and a couple of very close friends.
You don't really know the boss because you just started the job within the past few months.
You work short-term contracts and don't have 'a' (singular) boss.
You're eloping.
Even if you can't stand your boss, you should invite him/her. If you're lucky, your boss will bring a large present … or, better yet, send one in lieu of attending.




Do my fiancé and I have to invite our bosses and coworkers to our wedding?

The first question you should ask yourself is, do you have room on the guest list for them? If you’re planning a small wedding or really can’t afford additional guests, nix the office invites across the board. If you do have space for a few people from work, consider limiting the invites to your boss and/or assistant.

It’s a nice gesture and a good way to keep the invites to a minimum. A larger wedding or budget should give you more flexibility, but before you turn your reception into a replica of the office Christmas party, consider the following questions: 1) Which work buddies do you socialize with outside of the office? These office mates are no longer mere coworkers; they’re friends, and should be on your list. 2) Do you have a close-knit group of coworkers with whom you eat lunch on a regular basis?

Consider adding these folks if space allows. Once you’ve decided who makes the cut, ask the invitees to keep the wedding chat to a minimum so other coworkers don’t feel slighted.



How to Cut Your Guest List
Weddings are such a joyous occasion that it is normal for you and your parents to want to share your special day with everyone! However, most of us can't afford a wedding in which we invite everyone. So, often comes the time for some difficult decisions over who should be cut from the guest list.

The first step is to go through your guest list and put an 'A' or a 'B' next to each name. The A's are the absolute 'must invites' and the B list is everyone else.

The next step -- Cut the 'B list'. Ask yourself these three questions:

Have I seen this person in the last 12 months?

Have I spoken with this person in the last 6 months?

Did I send this person a Christmas card last year?

If you answered 'no' to all of the questions above, it's probably a good idea to cut this person from your guest list.
Still need to do some more cutting? Well, here are some more hints:

Don't invite your parent's friends, particularly if you don't know them very well.

There is ONE EXCEPTION to this rule. If your parents are paying for all or a majority of the wedding expenses, they may be entitled to 'more' input regarding the guest list and other areas of the wedding planning.

Don't invite old high school or college friends that you know you'll never see again.

Don't invite second and third cousins.

Don't invite business associates (unless of course, it's your boss).

Don't invite children.

Don't allow single people (those without 'significant others') to bring a date.

Don't invite people just because you were invited to their wedding. If you've lost touch with them... don't feel obligated to invite them to your wedding.

You may feel badly about cutting people from your guest list - but remember - this is the fastest way to save money on your wedding expenses!




Good luck and make you and your fi happy!

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

I have been really thinking about this. I have come to the decision taht I am only inviting my boss and the girl that sits next to me (maybe). I like my boss a lot though. But u dont have to invite your co-workers.

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

I think that since you've already gotten a sense that he thinks he's invited, especially since the other co-worker invited him, it would bode well for you to invite him. Obviously you're under no obligation to do so but a career standpoint I would

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

i invited both partners in my company and one came and the other sent a gift and his regrets that they had something planned for that evening. but i also invited half my office because its a small one and i close with almost everyone

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

I have also read it is proper ettiquet to invite your boss. Now, I don't know if that means you direct supervisor or the big boss. I also think it depends on your relationship with him/her. I invited my Boss and Supervisor because I have worked for them for 14 years.

Unless you are planning a small intimate family wedding, I think it is a nice gesture to invite him.

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

It is not a MUST but like all the previous posts you have to weigh certain factors, like the size of your wedding, your workplace, how long you have worked there. From what it sounds like, I feel that you should invite your boss.
In my situation I like my boss and I went to her wedding. I work at a small alw firm so I could not imagine not inviting the partners and certain attorneys I work under. HOwever, my FH is inviting a few co-workers, but no bosses or supervisors. This was one of our many disagreements, but he doesn't feel it is necessary. He doesn't interact with his immedieate boss like I do.

Re: Is it a MUST to invite the boss?

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Posted by halfpintny

I think that since you've already gotten a sense that he thinks he's invited, especially since the other co-worker invited him, it would bode well for you to invite him. Obviously you're under no obligation to do so but a career standpoint I would

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I agree. Especially since he asked about the wedding and the other co worker has invited him.