Re: Spinoff from a post on the 04 board about Too young to get married

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Posted by oct.2004bride

the post was asking for OUR OPINION!!! I gave mine. And i don't edit my opinion just because of the people who may read it. Someone asked i answered. I am basing MY OPINION on MY EXPERIENCE..which i thought was a implied by the constant I's.

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I thought the question was 'How old were you when you got engaged and how did your family react'




oct.2004bride - Like I said before 'I respect your opinion, but wouldn't it be better to base readiness for marriage on maturity and knowing yourself and knowing what you want in life, rather than stating the age at which you were ready and applying it to everyone else?' I'm sorry if in my response I sounded b1tchy. Reading your post makes sense and I can see why you would say 25 and over. I am glad for you that you waited and that now you found the one.
I am not offended because I am under 25 or because I disagree with you. All I am saying is that everyone is different and I HATE GENERALIZATIONS. I don't think a question 'How young is too young' is a good question to ask because of the differences among people. Some people who are 40 are too immature for marriage, while some who are 21 are ready. I know it was not your intention to offend anyone
I think a better answer to the question may be to describe things women should accomplish before getting married. I will start a new thread. Please everyone reply I am interested in what you all have to say.

I will say again I am not offended by your post and your should not be offended by mine. Lets all be friends!

Re: Spinoff from a post on the 04 board about Too young to get married

I got engaged at 27. It is true that it varies on the maturity level. I also believe most people are saying 23-25 as a popular age to get married because that is when they get settled with a job and be stable.

Re: Spinoff from a post on the 04 board about Too young to get married

I also get that a lot too about looking a lot younger than my age. I am a substitute teacher and sometimes they think I am a student!

Re: Spinoff from a post on the 04 board about Too young to get married

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Posted by 1017Bride

I also get that a lot too about looking a lot younger than my age. I am a substitute teacher and sometimes they think I am a student!

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i just finished my student teaching in a junior high and i got mistaken for a student too. with an engagement ring no less!!!

Re: Spinoff from a post on the 04 board about Too young to get married

I know looking young is good but sometimes its frustrating when someone thinks you are in high school when you graduated a while ago .

Re: Spinoff from a post on the 04 board about Too young to get married

Julz...i am not offended at all. I was just trying to tell my experience and the reason i had my opinion.

friends

Re: Spinoff from a post on the 04 board about Too young to get married

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Posted by oct.2004bride

Julz...i am not offended at all. I was just trying to tell my experience and the reason i had my opinion.

friends

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Answer my other thread!

p.s. is that you in your avatar? What beautiful hair!!!!

Re: Spinoff from a post on the 04 board about Too young to get married

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Posted by julz33

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Posted by oct.2004bride

Julz...i am not offended at all. I was just trying to tell my experience and the reason i had my opinion.

friends

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Answer my other thread!

p.s. is that you in your avatar? What beautiful hair!!!!

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I am scared of offending more girls..
Yes thats me..thanks sweetie

Re: Spinoff from a post on the 04 board about Too young to get married

i was 21..we were together only 5 months..but we just KNEW. you know when you know...we spend literally EVERY minute together when we're not at work..adn are sooo happy...its been over a year now..and i dont regret ANYTHING it gets better and better each day! we got a lot done so far so i am glad we did get engaged so early!
my parents were shocked..my sister is still grasping the whole idea (just cause she's older..i think its a little bit of jealousy) but everyone is so happy for us and said they knew it
i will be 24 when we're married (got engaged RIGHT before my 22 b-day) and he'll be 27 (was 24(about to be 25)

Re: Spinoff from a post on the 04 board about Too young to get married

I have had this discussion many times with friends. I'm 32, engaged when I was 31 and will be married at 33 (After reading the responses, I feel old compared to many others!!! I don't post to often but have been on these boards so much lately I figured I'd oversome my shyness and start posting more than just questions...)
I came close to getting engaged at 28 and for me I know it would not have worked out. In addition to level of maturity and being settled, I think a lot of finding the right person and being able to commit for a lifetime has to do with being ready and able to deal with a serious committed relationship, yes, part of that is maturity but part of it is also being able to open yourself completely to someone else. I know for me at at 28, while I think I was mature, had a great job, etc. I was not able to do this and therefore ended the relationship. He was probably not the right person for me but I don't think I was prepared for what a serious relationship entailed, not that I wasn't mature just not ready, if that makes any sense. I have af riend who is 22 and she is engaged and her and her FI are the perfect match, so I really think it boils down to the individual and their circumstances, not a matter of being too young. Some people are ready and some are not, I think it's way too easy to say oh, you're only 22 you'll change. Some people at 22 are ready and can grow and change with their partner. HOw lucky they are to find the right person at that time in their life and learn and grow together...

Re: Spinoff from a post on the 04 board about Too young to get married

thats the thing... i know people who are 30, who act just like they are 20.. i think marraige to a certain extent means settling down, means not going to clubs and bars looking for people, that you come home to the same person each day.. there are people who are in their 30's and 40's not ready for that yet..

the most imporant thing is know that you want and love the person your going to marry, that your ready and willing to commit to them... that doesnt come to people at a certain age, that comes by the relationship