Re: teacher brides - question

i'm a speech therapist at a school- so, not a teacher, but basically the same work/schedule.
i know you said you don't want summer weather, but i have to tell you... i'm SOOO glad we planned our wedding for june.
we got married this passed june 25. it was the end of my first year of working.... it worked out PERFECT!!! school ended june 17- i had a whole week off before the wedding to do all the last minute things, ( whch was good because i ended up getting really sick the last day of school and needed a few days to rest) i also can't tell you enough how GREAT it was to have the whole summer off after the wedding to get settled in to married life. i had never really had to cook or plan meals/grocery list before, never had to clean a whole house before, decorate, stuff like that- so it was so nice to have the whole summer off to get settled into that routine, learn how to make a few new recipes, get on a cleaning schedule, etc. before i had to go back to work... it helped DH and i get off to a really good start to running our household together- which is SOO important.
and honestly, it wasn't all that hot on our day. we went from my parents A/C house to the A/C limo to the A/c church to the A/C reception hall... we were outside for maybe 40-45 minutes taking pics in a shaded garden area, so it really wasn't all that bad.....
in the end, it is your day- but i just thought i'd tell you my side good luck!!

Re: teacher brides - question

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Posted by Jen2999

I am a teacher...

If you get a brand new teaching job.. you def do NOT want to take any days off after a vacation, especially so early in OCtober. It is very sort of taboo to take days before or after a vacation before you get tenure and even after.

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right, the point was that I wouldn't be taking off time, that's why we chose a 3 day weekend, so we could have a day or two together and then go back to work, and do the honeymoon later.

Re: teacher brides - question

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Posted by weddingbunny

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Posted by Jen2999

I am a teacher...

If you get a brand new teaching job.. you def do NOT want to take any days off after a vacation, especially so early in OCtober. It is very sort of taboo to take days before or after a vacation before you get tenure and even after.

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right, the point was that I wouldn't be taking off time, that's why we chose a 3 day weekend, so we could have a day or two together and then go back to work, and do the honeymoon later.

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In fairness, you did state that you would try to take that Tuesday off if possible. It seems you are very adament about doing it that weekend, and as long as you have no problem with it, then go ahead and do it. Not everyone deals with wedding planning and stress and their job the same way, so maybe you would be fine as a new teacher at the beginning of the year getting married over a three day weekend. But if you know you do not deal well with stress, then maybe look into some other time of the year. But I think that everyone has given you good advice. Good luck with your decision and with finding a job.

Re: teacher brides - question

I am a teacher also, and I just got married this past May. We wanted Memorial Day Weekend to follow a similar plan to yours, however our hall was already booked way in advance for those dates, so we chose May 7. I did not want to wait until the summer to get married because we have been together so long, we both felt it was time.

I had planned to take off the Thurs and Fri before, and the Monday after. We had a Sat wedding. I ended up taking off Thurs and Fri and went back on Monday (I coach softball and it was our last game of the season so I did not want to miss that MOnday). I wanted to do the mini-moon in Montauk also, but it didn't work out. I do think it is an awesome idea though. My principal was very supportive, however I am a tenured teacher. In my district, you have three personal days a year. Other teachers who have done similar things have had no problems as long as they did not take more than their personal days.

As an untenured teacher, if you are planning to return without taking days off, I say go for it. You have valid reasons for wanting the wedding when it is, and if I were you I wouldn't postpone. YOu have more than enough time already to plan and have all of your things done before the school year begins. THe week before will be very stressful, but that is the case even if you have it during the summer. If you think you can handle it, do it, and good luck!

Re: teacher brides - question

It is my first year teaching and it was very hard getting a job, so first thing first, I wish you luck in getting a job. You did say you were HS, so it will be probably easier for you. As my first year teaching, I am a leave replacement for the entire year, so I will be searching for a job again for this coming Sept. Just keep that in mind, that your first job can very well be a leave replacement and you might be looking for a job again the summer right before your wedding and starting a new position all over again that Sept.

With that said, if you handle stress well ( I do not) than you can make it work. Do whatever you think will make you happy. I agree with you that having a honeymoon later on can be nice as well.

Good luck with getting a job!!! Just a tip if you didn't know this already, start sending out your resume later this month, or early next month.

Re: teacher brides - question

my main rationale was a) the untentured teacher thing b) some school districts dock you if you take a day off before a three day weekend and c) teaching is EXHAUSTING and i would not want to have bags under my eyes on my wedding day
but, it sounds like you've got pros and cons on this board for going either way, so good luck with the decision!

Re: teacher brides - question

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Posted by prncssrachel

I would be very careful about getting married in October if you are planning on being a teacher. You will most likely NOT be able to take any days off around the holiday. In many, many districts, if you take off the day before or the day after a holiday weekend or vacation, you do not get paid for the holiday. I am a teacher and planned my wedding for the beginning of July for this reason. My sister is also a teacher and had her wedding this past April, however, she did it the first weekend in a week long vacation.
While your wedding is an extremely important event, your professional career that you've spent years working towards is incredibly important, as well. As a teacher, your reputation as being reliable is SO important. I cannot stress that enough. ESPECIALLY if you do not have tenure. I've known plenty of people who have been denied tenure for taking SICK days that were allotted to them. OR, they have had to make up those days before they could be granted tenure.
If you are able to plan your wedding for a longer vacation, then I would. You don't necessarily need to do it over the summer, however, it is extremely hard to predict the vacations of a hypothetical job you are hoping to have.

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Very Well said, Rachel!! I wouldn't dream of taking an extra day off around a vacation, especially being untenured - huge no no. I got married in the summer for this very reason. Would I have preferred a fall wedding? Sure - but there was no way that I would have gotten married during the school year. JMO.

Re: teacher brides - question

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Posted by petunia77

my main rationale was a) the untentured teacher thing b) some school districts dock you if you take a day off before a three day weekend and c) teaching is EXHAUSTING and i would not want to have bags under my eyes on my wedding day
but, it sounds like you've got pros and cons on this board for going either way, so good luck with the decision!

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thanks! Those are definitely valid reasons. I guess I have a lot to think about.

Re: teacher brides - question

Well... FH is a teacher and we decided on a July wedding just so that he wouldn't have to be harassed about taking time off from work. Plus we both attend college at night so we had that issue too. He is getting a second masters and I'm getting an associates for my job, so I can't take any time off of school.

Re: teacher brides - question

BTW, where are you thinking you might like to teach? in the city or in long island?

Re: teacher brides - question

I am a guidance counselor in a high school, and I am planning an October wedding...I just need to make sure that I get a lot of wedding stuff done over the summer before I go back. FH and I just didn't want to compromise on what we envisioned our wedding to be. As long as you are okay with taking your honeymoon at a later date, as we are, then I think you will be okay!

Re: teacher brides - question

I am getting married in April and everyone keeps asking me if we are going away. I am still unsure myself. I have to take off Friday for the wedding and then wanted to take off only Mon, Tues, and Wed. return on Thursday but I am stressing over taking off since this is my first year. All the othet teacher say this is the only time you can take off without getting in trouble. Wedding, Pregancy, or death so I may as well take a week and enjoy but I am thinking a few days may not hurt?
I also planned my wedding date before I had this job and I am working VERY hard and don't want my rep ruined for taking off for a wedding. I am still trying to decide what to do so this post helps me too! Thanks!

Re: teacher brides - question

I am a teacher into my 2nd year of teaching and I am getting married MARCH 25,07. I wanted a summer wedding but we couldn't afford it being that we are paying for most of it ourselves and we have a mortgage to pay.
If you are comfortable witth Oct and that's what u want go for it!!! My honeymoon will probably be a week or 2 later after the wedding during Easter break and I'm fine with it. Do what you feel in your heart is best! Don't 2nd guess yourself, if you don't want to deal with the heat Oct is PERFECT!!!
XOXOXOXO
Kitty

Re: teacher brides - question

I am in grad school and will be student teaching in the fall when i get married. FH and i hate the heat so we did not want to get married in the summer....i am dreading my desicion a bit because it is making things harder..i spoke with my grad school and they said it wouldn't be the end of the world if i took a week off from student teaching and made it up at the end..meaning extend it for the week. my only concern is that it may look bad at the school i am student teaching in....

anyone have any thoughts???Feel free to let me know...
thanks.

.

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Re: teacher brides - question

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Posted by petunia77

BTW, where are you thinking you might like to teach? in the city or in long island?

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I'm hoping for on the island somewhere. I don't want to have to commute that far, and I really don't want to live in the city.

I'm getting really nervous about getting a job though!

Re: teacher brides - question

I am a teacher and got married in November, the Friday before Thanksgiving. That way I only had to take a few days off instead of over a week. Principals had no problem (I went through three in the time between my engagement and wedding!! ) Three other girls got married withtin the last year that I work with and only one got married in the summer. The other two did something similar to me and got married before a holiday or vacation.

I could have never had a summer wedding. Go for what makes you happy!!

Re: teacher brides - question

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Posted by aje78

I am a teacher and I am getting married in July--I never thought I would have a summer wedding--I am not one for the extreme heat--But it just worked for me for a couple of reasons. I will have a nice week off before the wedding-then after the wedding I will be able to relax for 7 weeks. I won't have to worry about my students and lesson planning--I will be able to get adjusted to married life and enjoy it!!!! I agree that the heat and humidity are negatives--but for me the positives outweighed the negatives. I am sure no matter what you chose will be great and you will be happy--Good Luck!!!!!!!

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Those were my exact reasons for getting married in July. We also wanted to go on our honeymoon right away.

Re: teacher brides - question

Personally, I chose a wedding in the summer because of all the running around you have to do before the wedding - that and the fact that I wanted to be able to go on my honeymoon right after the wedding. If I had my choice, I would've gotten married in May or September - July was not my first choice b/c of it being so hot and humid. However, teaching is an EXTREMELY time consuming job - especially your 1st few years...you cannot expect to be out right after the kids leave each day...especially in the beginning of the year. I wouldn't want to worry about having to run all the last minute errands and planning lessons too.

Also, be careful with planning the wedding bc getting a job in LI is soooooo difficult (as I am sure you already know ) but most likely you will have to be a perm. sub or leave replacement for the 1st year or 2 before you find something permanent - that is how most teachers get their jobs.

Good luck!!!!!!!!!

Re: teacher brides - question