Re: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! (REVIEW) LONGEST POST EVER, BE WARNED!

---

Posted by JACSANT

i think all of us know that you need to work at a relationship and have a mutal respect for each other. but what shes saying sounds more like 'when your husband arrives home make sure you have freshened your make up and run to the door to great him from his long day at work' meanwhile, you could have been home all day with 3 screaming babies, cooking and cleaning. what she is saying is just not realistic. it just seems quite over the top.

---

I agree...I just cant see in this day and age who would actually agree with this way of thinking!

.

Re: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! (REVIEW) LONGEST POST EVER, BE WARNED!

---

Posted by MJDoc12

I really can't stand that phony Dr. Laura. she really p*ssses me off. i think she is a hypocrite.

seriously she's sooooo full of it cause she's older now--when she was our age she was NOT listening to anything she is preaching about now. i mean reallly---a while back pics came out that she let her LOVER (she was having an affair) take nude photos of her...again back when she was our age.

I hate the high and mightyness---she's not even a licensed psychologist -- her speciality is physiology not psychology or psychiatry

calling women who have sex before marriage 'un paid W H O R E S' -- is hypocritcal when she did it too

---

there are many things she says that i disagree with - but many of her points make sense and are true!

If you treat your man like you want to be treated, if you thank him like you want to be thanked when you do things - hes going to want to do these things because youare appreciateing him and not nagging him..
And even if you dont want to follow that its a good reminder that its nice to tell people thank you and how much you appreciate them - if you do this with ANYONE they are going to want to be there when YOU Need then

think of relationships with friends.. they help us out we thank them up and down we buy them a gift for going out of their way - and what happens - the next time you need them or they need you - you both are there for each other.. the same premise is true with your man..

Re: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! (REVIEW) LONGEST POST EVER, BE WARNED!

---

Posted by cookieling

---

Posted by jgl

Its very true - if you come home everyday and greet your man like you havent seen him in weeks - hes going to feel so special and hes going to want to do special things for you or want to do things that you need done without nagging. (of course that is just 1 example)

---

Or he'll just start to expect to be catered to and you'll end up even more unhappy. Did Dr. Laura write an equivalent book for a man to read about making his wife happy?? I don't think so.

She is such a phony!!! Read her bio.

'...While working at USC, [Dr. Laura] met Dr. Lewis G. Bishop, who was married with dependent children. According to divorce filings, Schlessinger and Bishop began an affair. Bishop left his wife after more than 20 years of marriage, and moved in with Schlessinger. They lived together as an unmarried couple, and Schlessinger tried to get pregnant after reversing an earlier tubal ligation and suffering an ectopic pregnancy. ..'

Gues that makes her a home-wrecker and an 'unpaid w-h-o-r-e'

---

you dont have to like her - you dont have to believe what she says.

Re: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! (REVIEW) LONGEST POST EVER, BE WARNED!

---

Posted by FutureMrs.T

---

Posted by JACSANT

i think all of us know that you need to work at a relationship and have a mutal respect for each other. but what shes saying sounds more like 'when your husband arrives home make sure you have freshened your make up and run to the door to great him from his long day at work' meanwhile, you could have been home all day with 3 screaming babies, cooking and cleaning. what she is saying is just not realistic. it just seems quite over the top.

---

I agree...I just cant see in this day and age who would actually agree with this way of thinking!

---

When we have kids, and I stay home with them, an FH is working 50-60 hours a week to enable me to do so, you're damn right I will be at the door greeting him. I do it now.

Re: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! (REVIEW) LONGEST POST EVER, BE WARNED!

i didnt read the review bc i want to read the book but i bookmarked it

but seriously i totally agree with everything she says ( on her show )

maybe its not RIGHT and maybe its not PC but thats the way it is in my house and thats the way it will be when i am with FH - we are very traditional and believe in the traditional (old school) roles. . .I believe all this PC bullcrap is leading to the downfall of society THERE I SAID IT!!! i dont like to talk about it often bc i have never really met someone who agrees with me LOL so i dont feel like getting flamed but that is how i feel - i am definitely an anti feminist.

but i will not say more until i have read it!

Re: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! (REVIEW) LONGEST POST EVER, BE WARNED!

---

Posted by jgl

---

Posted by MJDoc12

I really can't stand that phony Dr. Laura. she really p*ssses me off. i think she is a hypocrite.

seriously she's sooooo full of it cause she's older now--when she was our age she was NOT listening to anything she is preaching about now. i mean reallly---a while back pics came out that she let her LOVER (she was having an affair) take nude photos of her...again back when she was our age.

I hate the high and mightyness---she's not even a licensed psychologist -- her speciality is physiology not psychology or psychiatry

calling women who have sex before marriage 'un paid W H O R E S' -- is hypocritcal when she did it too

---

there are many things she says that i disagree with - but many of her points make sense and are true!

If you treat your man like you want to be treated, if you thank him like you want to be thanked when you do things - hes going to want to do these things because youare appreciateing him and not nagging him..
And even if you dont want to follow that its a good reminder that its nice to tell people thank you and how much you appreciate them - if you do this with ANYONE they are going to want to be there when YOU Need then

think of relationships with friends.. they help us out we thank them up and down we buy them a gift for going out of their way - and what happens - the next time you need them or they need you - you both are there for each other.. the same premise is true with your man..

---

my issue is -- what makes her such an expert? she's gonna sit here and tell us what we are supposed to do to make our husbands 'happy' -- well i don't want to know how someone who had an affair on her first husband---with a man who was married for 20 years --- breaking up not only hers but the lover's marriage---then moving in with said lover---getting pregnant and having a child out of wedlock (something that is a HUGE NO-NO that she preaches) and then finally later on marrying.

she is someone who has terrible relationships in real life-- so i don't think she has an merit or credit to say anything about how us women should act

her book mainly is about making the man happy--like we are slaves to our men--what about our needs? and the other things that might bear a ring of truth to them---they are common sense stuff. if you are home all day long and sit on you azz and do nothing and don't shower and greet your husband at the door looking like the wicked witch of the west----DUH -- of course he isn't gonna like it.

Re: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! (REVIEW) LONGEST POST EVER, BE WARNED!

i am sorry but i have CLOSE family members. . . that i LOVE that are MALE and they bust their behinds working 7 days a week so that their wife can stay home and NOT cook or do laundry. . . um sorry is that what feminism is all about? i know that is not how it always is but i see it all the time around me

this is something i feel very strongly about!

Re: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! (REVIEW) LONGEST POST EVER, BE WARNED!

greeting him is one thing, i agree with that, dont misunderstand what im getting at here, i think you should honor EACH OTHER, praise EACH OTHER, respect EACH OTHER. its not all one way, if you are lucky enough to be able to stay home and be a homemaker im sure youll realize that that job is just and important and stressful than any other job.

Re: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! (REVIEW) LONGEST POST EVER, BE WARNED!

---

Posted by MJDoc12

---

Posted by jgl

---

Posted by MJDoc12

I really can't stand that phony Dr. Laura. she really p*ssses me off. i think she is a hypocrite.

seriously she's sooooo full of it cause she's older now--when she was our age she was NOT listening to anything she is preaching about now. i mean reallly---a while back pics came out that she let her LOVER (she was having an affair) take nude photos of her...again back when she was our age.

I hate the high and mightyness---she's not even a licensed psychologist -- her speciality is physiology not psychology or psychiatry

calling women who have sex before marriage 'un paid W H O R E S' -- is hypocritcal when she did it too

---

there are many things she says that i disagree with - but many of her points make sense and are true!

If you treat your man like you want to be treated, if you thank him like you want to be thanked when you do things - hes going to want to do these things because youare appreciateing him and not nagging him..
And even if you dont want to follow that its a good reminder that its nice to tell people thank you and how much you appreciate them - if you do this with ANYONE they are going to want to be there when YOU Need then

think of relationships with friends.. they help us out we thank them up and down we buy them a gift for going out of their way - and what happens - the next time you need them or they need you - you both are there for each other.. the same premise is true with your man..

---

my issue is -- what makes her such an expert? she's gonna sit here and tell us what we are supposed to do to make our husbands 'happy' -- well i don't want to know how someone who had an affair on her first husband---with a man who was married for 20 years --- breaking up not only hers but the lover's marriage---then moving in with said lover---getting pregnant and having a child out of wedlock (something that is a HUGE NO-NO that she preaches) and then finally later on marrying.

she is someone who has terrible relationships in real life-- so i don't think she has an merit or credit to say anything about how us women should act

her book mainly is about making the man happy--like we are slaves to our men--what about our needs? and the other things that might bear a ring of truth to them---they are common sense stuff. if you are home all day long and sit on you azz and do nothing and don't shower and greet your husband at the door looking like the wicked witch of the west----DUH -- of course he isn't gonna like it.

---

its not about who she is or what she has done in her life - don't people make mistakes - we forgive people for worse things.. get passed all that and read the book!

.

Re: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! (REVIEW) LONGEST POST EVER, BE WARNED!

I agree with a lot that’s being said on both sides, but I just had to chime in with this.

I’m the major breadwinner. He is a great cooker, so he cooks and I clean; if I cook, then he cleans. We do things equally. We’re equals. And if I wanted to stay at home and be a traditional housewife, I could do that too. To me, that’s what feminism is: being equals and being able to do anything.

.

Re: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! (REVIEW) LONGEST POST EVER, BE WARNED!

---

Posted by ant n tilde

i didnt read the review bc i want to read the book but i bookmarked it

but seriously i totally agree with everything she says ( on her show )

maybe its not RIGHT and maybe its not PC but thats the way it is in my house and thats the way it will be when i am with FH - we are very traditional and believe in the traditional (old school) roles. . .I believe all this PC bullcrap is leading to the downfall of society THERE I SAID IT!!! i dont like to talk about it often bc i have never really met someone who agrees with me LOL so i dont feel like getting flamed but that is how i feel - i am definitely an anti feminist.

but i will not say more until i have read it!

---

I agree people have gotten too PC that they forget some of the old school things.. \

like opening dorrs for girls and things like that .. some stuff should come back!

Re: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! (REVIEW) LONGEST POST EVER, BE WARNED!

---

Posted by KitWisdom
To me, that’s what feminism is: being equals and being able to do anything.

---

ITA!! or i should say i *wish* that is what feminism meant. i feel that because i choose to cook and clean and take care of my kids while my husband works. . . it is looked down on by society. . .like i am being a slave to my husband etc.

so that was very well said - while i wish that was what feminism means i do not believe that it is at that point yet

etf: spelling

Re: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! (REVIEW) LONGEST POST EVER, BE WARNED!

---

Posted by jgl
its not about who she is or what she has done in her life - don't people make mistakes - we forgive people for worse things.. get passed all that and read the book!

---

i have read her books--trust me. i'm not just hating on her---i really have read her books before--just because i wanted to see what she had to say. but i simply CAN NOT respect someone who says one thing and does another. that's my issue with her.

yes, people make mistakes--but this woman is putting her opinions out as fact -- like she's a real psychiatrist -- and if you don't practice what you preach -- you are a hypocrite, plain and simple.

i wonder if she was following all her rules when she was in her late 20's early 30's and was humping away at someone else's husband??

i really don't judge ppl---she can do whatever she wants and screw an entire football team for all i care---but when she puts her opinions down on paper and gets legions of women to follow and believe in her--then you bet your azz she better be the prime example.

its like Jimmy Swaggart preaching about God and then banging his secretary on the side and saying 'oh please forgive me everyone! i made a mistake'

Re: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! (REVIEW) LONGEST POST EVER, BE WARNED!

I see a lot of attacks on her. And all the ad hominem attacks in the world mean nothing unless you are going to read the book or at least listen to what I said about the book.

A person doesn't need to have a perfect past to be able to offer advice. Drug counselors are often former addicts, people who made mistakes in the past learn from them... at least they should. So if you still think that someone has to have a perfect past or a completely hypocritally-free life to offer advice, no point in reading any further. We'll never agree. That's fine.

But the book isn't about doing everything for him, and making him happy all the time at your expense. It's about understanding what men respond to, and how they perceive things. It's about making him happier, which will make him want to make you happier. It's true, and so far, in my relationship, it has worked, and had remarkable effects on us.

The knee-jerk reaction by anyone who believes themselves to be a feminist is going to be to hate this and to hare her advice because it basically is a traditional view of things. If you can never be swayed into thinking that some of those traditional ways of thinking are correct, then again, we will never agree. That's fine too.

But picking apart one statement she has made, and using that to then completely dismiss everything she has to say is a simplistic way of viewing her advice. Taking mistakes she made in her past and dismissing her ability to offer any advice is the definition of close mindedness

Re: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! (REVIEW) LONGEST POST EVER, BE WARNED!

i dont think that being a stay at home mom and homemaker is being a slave to your husband, but i think how dr. laura is saying to do it is.

Re: The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! (REVIEW) LONGEST POST EVER, BE WARNED!

Thanks Amanda I appreciate the review. I read the whole thing and found it very interesting. I don't think I will read this book but I might buy the one you said you just bought...The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands.

I mean I feel like I have been living this books ways (not all of the suggestionsin the book however) throughout FH and my whole relationship. I mean since FH and I don't see each other like ever since he was stationed in San Diego and now Japan. I feel we have such great compromising skills and communication as well as not taking each other for granted. I appreciate every min i have on the phone with him and always make time to sit on the webcams on the weekend. Plus I mean I know he is on the other side of the country but hwen he tells me he is going out for the night with some guys- thats where the convo ends- ITS FINE WITH ME. I mean not that I really could do anything with himbeing in Japan but I mean I could be a pain in the @$$ and ***** about it. BUt I dont I realize he needs his time to go out and enjoy himself with the guys...

Thanks again Amanda!!

.