Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

I have been trying so hard to be understanding of his feelings about the wedding....I don't like to be the center of attention either, but for one day....i'll **** it up to have the day of my dreams....

the good thing is that he has been much more understanding about how important the wedding is to me. and that's really all i need.

that, and him :)

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

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Posted by TraceySLP1

I have been trying so hard to be understanding of his feelings about the wedding....I don't like to be the center of attention either, but for one day....i'll **** it up to have the day of my dreams....

the good thing is that he has been much more understanding about how important the wedding is to me. and that's really all i need.

that, and him :)

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Oh, I understand. I was throwing the big wedding out the window, and it hurt me to say it, but it open the doors for him to tell me what he is thinking and wanted. My FH doesn't like the center of attention, but I started taking him places where other people are around and not look at him so much. e.g. wedding, parties lounge areas. I needed him to be himself and not think like the movie Carrie' they going to laugh at you, “kind of thinking. I just wanted you to know that sometimes they loosen up.

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

the 'carrie' reference was tooooo funny!

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

I am so bad, I can make a joke out of anything. My FH is not the best dancer, but I pull him on the dance floor. If he see people there he will go, if there is no one then I will dance by myself. I look at his point of view then make it easy for him.

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

Just dropping in to say hi to my lovely ladies! Hope everyone is doing well!

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

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Posted by MrsBlueRibbon

Just dropping in to say hi to my lovely ladies! Hope everyone is doing well!

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Hi Jen!!! how are you doing? Things are good- very busy- so glad I got done all that stuff early, because these last few months are going to be hell working on the house. But otherwise all is good

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

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Posted by TraceySLP1

Hi, all!

Here's a question for all of u.....I'm wondering if anyone is having the same issues, and I've been embarrassed to post this anywhere else, b/c all the 'younger' brides seem to have FHs that are totally psyched about their wedding....

here's the story....

FH was married b4 (town hall), this is my FIRST marriage. So i've spent the last 38 years DREAMING of having a wedding, and doing the whole always a bridesmaid, never a bride thing.

FH wanted town hall. He doesn't drink, or dance, and doesn't like big crowds. He's also very private and is having anxiety about 'baring his soul' in front of a crowd of ppl at the wedding.

It also doesnt help that his parents divorced a few years ago after 25 years of marriage and his parents really do not get along very well..so his idea of marriage in general is very tainted.

We had numerous talks about me wanting a wedding, and when he proposed and agreed to do the whole wedding thing, i was so happy b/c i knew he was only doing it to make me happy.
Since then there has been a bunch of times where he says things like 'i didn't want this wedding', and feel so bad about it.....then we fight and/or i cry and he's good for another few weeks.

He hasn't been involved in any of the planning really, save for picking the hall, and the cake appointment. I'm fine with that, but i'm kinda on edge when i talk about the wedding with him, waiting for the next fight.

He has said numerous times, he would've married me MONTHS ago, but I wanted a wedding. So it's not about whether or not he wants to marry me, it's just about the WEDDING.

sorry this is so long. needed to vent i guess, and to ask if anyone else is in a similar situation? Thanks for reading :)

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Wow, I am so glad you posted this because this is EXACTLY what is going on with FH and me! A few weeks ago we had a huge blow out because I asked him something about the wedding (who he wanted as a best man) and he just flipped out at me and said 'I dont want *ALL* of this crazy nonesense! To put on some stupid penguin suit and parade in front of all our friends and family like some circus show..thats not me! I dont want that!! I dont know how I could get through that day!'.

What I've done is just not talk wedding around him. I come to LIW to vent about my wedding stuff, and ask my mom about vendors, etc. I basically told him that its the only way I can celebrate w/ all our friends and family in 1 place and that all men go through with it..

So give him time..he has to warm up to the idea as the day grows closer...I least I hope so!

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

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Posted by Future Mrs H

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Posted by MrsBlueRibbon

Just dropping in to say hi to my lovely ladies! Hope everyone is doing well!

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Hi Jen!!! how are you doing? Things are good- very busy- so glad I got done all that stuff early, because these last few months are going to be hell working on the house. But otherwise all is good

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Hi Celia! I'm doing good, much better anyway. Work has been pretty crazy, but I guess that's a good thing. Did you guys buy a house, or are you talking about FH's in Bayside?

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

oh I wanna jump in!

This thread is so long I think maybe we should start a new one!

Hi I'm Amy.

I'm 40, FH is 31. yep, I'm a cougar.

I was married before..big wedding. I didn't have any say in it at all. My Mom was a nightmare so its time it's all about FH and me.

Problem is, he wants a HUGEEEE wedding and I want a normal one.

I really worry people will say omg she already had a wedding but FH hasn't and he's from a big Latin family and they all want one.

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

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Posted by allornil

oh I wanna jump in!

This thread is so long I think maybe we should start a new one!

Hi I'm Amy.

I'm 40, FH is 31. yep, I'm a cougar.

I was married before..big wedding. I didn't have any say in it at all. My Mom was a nightmare so its time it's all about FH and me.

Problem is, he wants a HUGEEEE wedding and I want a normal one.

I really worry people will say omg she already had a wedding but FH hasn't and he's from a big Latin family and they all want one.

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Hi Amy and welcome. I'm Renay 42 and FH 50. Since you are marrying into a Latin family you have to show them as cougar, you are the best out there. Are you having dilemma with the FH or the family. Does he want a big bridal party? I am only asking because my family is go big or go home. Keep breathing you are going to be fine.

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

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Posted by MrsBlueRibbon

Just dropping in to say hi to my lovely ladies! Hope everyone is doing well!

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Hi Jenn, what have you been up too? When are we going to meet up. Since the ladies don't want a gtg JK, I know everyone is busy, but I want another gtg, before I forgot what that is.

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

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Posted by Ray8183

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Posted by MrsBlueRibbon

Just dropping in to say hi to my lovely ladies! Hope everyone is doing well!

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Hi Jenn, what have you been up too? When are we going to meet up. Since the ladies don't want a gtg JK, I know everyone is busy, but I want another gtg, before I forgot what that is.

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Hey!!!!!!! I want a GTG but I wont have any time till after Sept. I am crazy busy right now!

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

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Posted by allornil

oh I wanna jump in!

This thread is so long I think maybe we should start a new one!

Hi I'm Amy.

I'm 40, FH is 31. yep, I'm a cougar.

I was married before..big wedding. I didn't have any say in it at all. My Mom was a nightmare so its time it's all about FH and me.

Problem is, he wants a HUGEEEE wedding and I want a normal one.

I really worry people will say omg she already had a wedding but FH hasn't and he's from a big Latin family and they all want one.

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welcome Amy! My name is Celia 47 and FH is 45 (he calls me a baby cougar since I am only 1 1/2 years older)

Nooooooooo- I dont want to start a new thread- I want to make this the longest thread ever

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

hahaah! ok then. I'm glad I posted here. I love all the LIW brides but sometimes I'm sad that I'm not 25.

FH wants a BIG wedding w every perk ever. hes a complete diva. His family would be happy with anything we want. they're honestly amazing but I know they want a big bash!

Oh his family LOVES me. they always tell him, Anthony, you have no idea how lucky you are and his mothers been calling me her daughter in law for years.

so part if me wants to run to Land's End and book today and part of me is like whoa...calm down and wait. we've been living together for 6 or so years btw. I guess its time to get married. :)

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

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Posted by allornil

hahaah! ok then. I'm glad I posted here. I love all the LIW brides but sometimes I'm sad that I'm not 25.

FH wants a BIG wedding w every perk ever. hes a complete diva. His family would be happy with anything we want. they're honestly amazing but I know they want a big bash!

Oh his family LOVES me. they always tell him, Anthony, you have no idea how lucky you are and his mothers been calling me her daughter in law for years.

so part if me wants to run to Land's End and book today and part of me is like whoa...calm down and wait. we've been living together for 6 or so years btw. I guess its time to get married. :)

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Yeah another 11 bride...I'm glad I'm not the only one that has been with their FH for many years..We will be together 9+ years when we get married

All the other ladies...HI

I booked my Epics for the end of this month

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

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Posted by allornil

hahaah! ok then. I'm glad I posted here. I love all the LIW brides but sometimes I'm sad that I'm not 25.

FH wants a BIG wedding w every perk ever. hes a complete diva. His family would be happy with anything we want. they're honestly amazing but I know they want a big bash!

Oh his family LOVES me. they always tell him, Anthony, you have no idea how lucky you are and his mothers been calling me her daughter in law for years.

so part if me wants to run to Land's End and book today and part of me is like whoa...calm down and wait. we've been living together for 6 or so years btw. I guess its time to get married. :)

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Amy, Land's End is beautiful and the food is great. Kristen was married there in 2008 and can answer any questions. Enjoy the time and you don't have to rush in booking the RH

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

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Posted by Im getting Married

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Posted by allornil

hahaah! ok then. I'm glad I posted here. I love all the LIW brides but sometimes I'm sad that I'm not 25.

FH wants a BIG wedding w every perk ever. hes a complete diva. His family would be happy with anything we want. they're honestly amazing but I know they want a big bash!

Oh his family LOVES me. they always tell him, Anthony, you have no idea how lucky you are and his mothers been calling me her daughter in law for years.

so part if me wants to run to Land's End and book today and part of me is like whoa...calm down and wait. we've been living together for 6 or so years btw. I guess its time to get married. :)

---

Yeah another 11 bride...I'm glad I'm not the only one that has been with their FH for many years..We will be together 9+ years when we get married

All the other ladies...HI

I booked my Epics for the end of this month

---

That's great Vanessa, is Thomas taking the pics?

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

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Posted by Ray8183

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Posted by Im getting Married

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Posted by allornil

hahaah! ok then. I'm glad I posted here. I love all the LIW brides but sometimes I'm sad that I'm not 25.

FH wants a BIG wedding w every perk ever. hes a complete diva. His family would be happy with anything we want. they're honestly amazing but I know they want a big bash!

Oh his family LOVES me. they always tell him, Anthony, you have no idea how lucky you are and his mothers been calling me her daughter in law for years.

so part if me wants to run to Land's End and book today and part of me is like whoa...calm down and wait. we've been living together for 6 or so years btw. I guess its time to get married. :)

---

Yeah another 11 bride...I'm glad I'm not the only one that has been with their FH for many years..We will be together 9+ years when we get married

All the other ladies...HI

I booked my Epics for the end of this month

---

That's great Vanessa, is Thomas taking the pics?

---

Yup..now all I have to do is find an outfit or 2, someone to do my makeup early in the AM and I should be okay..I'm gonna shop this weekend

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

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Posted by Im getting Married

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Posted by Ray8183

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Posted by Im getting Married

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Posted by allornil

hahaah! ok then. I'm glad I posted here. I love all the LIW brides but sometimes I'm sad that I'm not 25.

FH wants a BIG wedding w every perk ever. hes a complete diva. His family would be happy with anything we want. they're honestly amazing but I know they want a big bash!

Oh his family LOVES me. they always tell him, Anthony, you have no idea how lucky you are and his mothers been calling me her daughter in law for years.

so part if me wants to run to Land's End and book today and part of me is like whoa...calm down and wait. we've been living together for 6 or so years btw. I guess its time to get married. :)

---

Yeah another 11 bride...I'm glad I'm not the only one that has been with their FH for many years..We will be together 9+ years when we get married

All the other ladies...HI

I booked my Epics for the end of this month

---

That's great Vanessa, is Thomas taking the pics?

---

Yup..now all I have to do is find an outfit or 2, someone to do my makeup early in the AM and I should be okay..I'm gonna shop this weekend

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How early because if the department stores are open, it free.

Re: Official 30+ Brides (previously 40+ thread)

I have to be back home by 9:30..he is meeting us here then we are going to take our pics